


Problem with his Vessel

by EmeraldGirl



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Bottom Castiel, Innocent Castiel, M/M, Smut, Top Dean, Wings, angel in heat, wings kink
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-16
Updated: 2017-03-02
Packaged: 2018-03-23 07:27:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 73,089
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3759646
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmeraldGirl/pseuds/EmeraldGirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There's a problem with his vessel, or at least that's what Cas thinks... he keeps getting these stiff aching problems between his thighs! So what happens when he goes to Dean for a little help with said problems? Even worse, what happens when Heaven finds out about such "forbidden acts" between Hunter and Angel? Naturally, all hell breaks loose!<br/>Rated M for Smut and Language. Top!Dean, Bottom!Cas. Wings Kink. Angel in Heat.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story kinda starts out as porn without plot but it quickly becomes porn with plot so...  
> Come for the smut and stay for the story!  
> Feedback is welcomed and encouraged!

There was a problem with his vessel, or at least, that's what the angel had convinced himself.

No matter what he did… it just kept happening.

There seemed to be no rhyme or reason to it, it would just happen... and to Castiel it seemed like it was starting to happen more and more frequently.

 _It_ was so uncomfortable and  _it_  would happen and completely distract him from whatever task was at hand.

So what was  _it_  exactly? Well, not even Cas himself really understood. It was a discomfort that started between his thighs. It ached, sometimes even twitched, and it was stiff…

It just… would do that, all on its own will. Strange tingles would run down his spine for seemingly no reason and it would start bugging him. Now that Castiel had realized that it was happening, it was becoming impossible to ignore.

The angel needed help. He was sure that this was a human issue because he had never experienced anything like it before he had taken Jimmy as his vessel. So for him, that meant asking around heaven would be useless. The only other people that Castiel could think to ask were Sam, Dean or Bobby.

Now that he was really thinking about it Cas remembered this happening to him once before… It happened because of the pizza man and the babysitter… but, he couldn't remember the name that Dean had given the condition. He never told Cas how to solve this issue either…

Perhaps Dean was the one he should go to.

On another hunting trip and it's the same old same old. Research and late nights in a rundown motel with questionable bed sheets and poor air conditioning. The boys, Sam and Dean, had been separated for the first time in a while. It was rare, but it did happen that they would run out of rooms with two single beds, so the brothers had no choice but to shack up in separate rooms.

It was late, getting close to 3 A.M., and Dean was just a little bit more than tipsy. He'd been searching all night, but couldn't seem to come up with anything that matched spot on. Infuriatingly, he seemed to find all kinds of random creatures that shared some similarities with the crimes they had investigated… but no one creature fit the profile. So what, a fucking Monster Mob?

Sam finally shot a text over to Dean claiming that he was giving up for the night and headed to bed. He, annoyingly, suggested that Dean do the same. It didn't help that Dean's short responses back usually had typos… but drinking made things easier to deal with for Dean, and he liked the warmth that spread through him when he started to feel good. So even if it made the keyboard on his phone a little fuzzy… he drank. And that was that.

Dean rubbed his eyes into the rough white towel that hung in the motel bathroom. He had just washed his face… something he seemed to do a lot of when he was feeling stressed… or oily… Somehow cleaning his face made him feel better.

He tried to get the buzzing of all the information he had read about monsters and supernatural beings to stop buzzing in his brain, but maybe he was a little too out of it for all that. He really hadn't remembered anything he'd actually read in the last few hours… So why was his head buzzing so much?

Dean turned and headed back toward the bed. He was already stripped down to just a t-shirt and boxers, and with the constant humming of the old run-down air conditioner (something he heard a lot more of when he was a kid), he knew he'd be sleeping good tonight.

As he stepped toward the bed he heard a familiar whooshing sound and sure enough, an angel followed. Castiel stood rather close to Dean, making the man jerk a bit in fright.

"Hello, Dean," his husky voice called out.

Dean didn't want to do this right now. Cas and all his angel shit could wait until Dean had had at least 4 hours of some good sleep.

Dean stepped back just slightly; mumbling under his breath about the long lost battle of "personal space" and gave Cas a good once over. What? Cas was good looking; he was allowed to look.

So look he did, until he was ready to meet Castiel's disgruntled blue gaze. His dark hair was askew and he always looked so grumpy to Dean.

"What's up, Cas," Dean practically yawned as he looked longingly at the bed. It looked absolutely perfect for jumping face first into. Cas's face seemed to become even more uncomfortable.

"I'm sorry, I've come too late. I'm interfering with your sleep."

Cas turned and acted like he was going to fly off so Dean spoke up, saying, "What is it? Just spit it out."

Cas spun around so quickly that it made Dean feel off balance. The angel was right in front of him in seconds whispering in a tone Dean could barely register and his eyebrows were scrunched together so tightly that Dean almost found it funny…

Well, maybe he would've if Cas getting all up in his personal bubble didn't leave him trying to swallow the sudden dryness in his throat. He shook his head back and forth to try and make his brain work better before throwing his hands up and stopping Cas midsentence.

"Okay, whoa, whoa, whoa, what the hell? Slow down, I can barely hear you." Cas looked up into Dean's eyes looking downright caught, like he had his hand in the cookie jar or something."

"Cas, what? What is it," Dean asked. The way Cas was acting was beginning to make him worry.

"Dean, I think there is something wrong with my vessel," Castiel said, his eyes stared earnestly up at Dean and he spoke with conviction.

Dean felt a small kick as adrenaline shot through his body. If Cas thought something was wrong then he was ready to spring into action and help him fix it, 3 A.M. or not.

"Okay, what's happening to you? What do you think is wrong?"

Castiel's eyebrows managed to scrunch together even more than they already were. He gave Dean such a weighted, unhappy look that it actually made Dean feel like he had done something wrong.

Cas opened his trench coat a little bit before looking down at himself. "This keeps happening Dean. I don't… I don't know what it means."

Dean looked at Cas confused. His chest looked fine, his clothes weren't torn. He continued downward trying to see whatever it was that Cas was talking about but nothing really stood out. It wasn't Dean's fault he didn't see it… It was dark out, and the shadow from Castiel's trench coat wasn't helping.

"Cas… I don't see it…," Dean mumbled. When he didn't see anything alarmingly wrong with Cas his little adrenaline kick seemed to end, his eyes were burning with the need to sleep and the beer was making him a little woozy.

Cas moved closer to Dean, standing inches in front of him. Cas wrapped his hand around Dean's wrist and pulled it to his crotch. It happened so fast that Dean didn't even have time to think. And holy hell… The angel was hard, hard as a fucking rock behind his tight black slacks. Dean felt his entire body spike with shock and embarrassment. Cas was so fucking horny that he was rubbing Dean's hand against it without really knowing what the hell he was doing!

"Holy shit, Cas," Dean shouted, pushing the angel away from him a bit and turning away to try and compose himself. Cas was… rubbing his dick… in Dean's hand… asking for help?

What?

Dean tried the thought once more, hoping this time it would make sense.

Cas… was horny and was asking Dean for help?

What the hell?!

"I apologize Dean, was I too straightforward?"

"Ff—Cas?! You… you can't do that kind of thing to people. It's, I don't know, sexual harassment."

"I apologize Dean; I… don't know how to make it stop. I remembered this happening from the pizza man video I watched… and I thought you could help me."

WHAT THE FUCK!?

Was Cas asking him to role play or something, why was he bringing up porn scenarios?! This just kept getting worse.

Dean's skin was probably glowing bright red with embarrassment with the way Cas was talking to him. He didn't even know the weight of his words! Was he coming on to Dean? No way – there's no way that Cas would have enough brains to do such a thing.  
Dean took a breath and finally looked back at the angel who was staring at him in desperation.

"Please Dean, tell me what to do."

Perhaps it was all that warm alcohol burning in his chest, or maybe it was the fact that Dean's brain was having a horned-up hay day with all the visual's that Cas was throwing his way. But, Dean definitely liked the way the angel was practically begging him to help him take care of it… and…

Dean shook his head, trying to dislodge his thoughts and toss them out his ears. This had to be the alcohol talking, there's no way he was going to jerk Cas off. End of story. Goodbye.

"Cas… you're just horny," Dean finally said. He rubbed the back of his neck in embarrassment. Dean was able to cover most of his own confusion with a laugh. Even with how weird this was, it was hilarious.

"What do I do to turn it off," Cas asked. He still held his trench coat open and stared down at his crotch. When he turned his body a certain way Dean could clearly see the defined bulge that he had somehow missed earlier. Then, holy hell, he saw it twitch behind Cas's pants. His knees felt weak, and the alcohol telling him to jump that poor angel's bones was getting louder and louder.

The room swayed a little.

"You have… to masturbate."

Cas looked up at him completely blank,

"Dean?"

"Are you -?!" fucking kidding me, was what he was going to say. But Dean stopped himself and sighed. He was going to need a lot more to drink after all of this.

"You have to touch it. Rub it and whatever until you finish," Dean closed his eyes and rubbed his forehead. The sound of a belt clinking brought his attention running back. Cas was trying to undo his belt right then and there!

"Cas! Oh Jesus, no! Not here, you're supposed to do that kind of thing in private!"  
"I'm sorry Dean, I-"

"Look, I get it, just get out of here okay? And don't say anything about this to anyone. You hear?"

Dean was shoving Cas in hopes of making the angel take flight; instead, he was just kind of pushing him toward the corner of the wall. Dean practically smashed into Cas when he seemingly turned his strength back on.

"Dean, I do not think I can accomplish this task on my own. I've never performed masturbation. Can you assist me?"

Dean burst out laughing. This was all way too much to be serious. Maybe this was a trickster prank. Or – well. Could angels even have sex? Was that … allowed?

Dean mentally slapped himself.

"Cas, do you realize what you're asking me to do? Friends don't normally do this for each other. This is… sexual. It's more for people you're attracted to…," Dean's words were kind of spilling out of his mouth in a rush.

"Dean I would hardly say we can be categorized as "normal friends"," Cas said.

Holy shit, he really wanted this. He was downright asking Dean to jerk him off.

"I just need you to show me how to do it… Once I understand I will take care of it myself. Please show me, Dean."

Alright, fuck it. If he was going to outright ask for it Dean was going to do it. He liked Cas, he wasn't going to lie, and he'd definitely been curious as to what the angel was packing. If Cas wanted him to jerk him off he was going to. The alcohol in Dean's system repressed his inhibitions enough to make the decision an easy on to come to.

"Do not tell anyone about this… okay," Dean said, stepping toward the other man.

"Y-yes. I won't tell anyone."

Cas felt his back bump into the wall and didn't realize that Dean had been moving forward and he had been moving backward.

The hungry look in Dean's eyes was making him nervous… but even that didn't seem to make sense as to why. He wanted Dean's help… right?

One thing was for sure, he wanted this taken care of. It was aching him.

Dean stood in front of him, not looking Cas in the eyes. He reached forward for Castiel's pants button. Cas was unsure, but he remained silent as Dean quickly undid his belt and unzipped his pants.

Just having them unzipped had made it feel much better! Cas sighed in relief as he felt the strange thing almost twitching happily to have a little bit of freedom. Dean laughed under his breath but Castiel said nothing. He was endlessly curious about what could be funny about this strange problem, but Dean was so focused on what he was doing that Cas didn't want to disrupt him.

Dean's shoulders came much closer to Castiel's face. It was almost like a hug, of sorts. Dean had leaned forward, pushing Cas's back against the wall behind him and pulling his hips forward slightly. One of Dean's hands was on the wall close to Cas's ear, and his other was the one leading the effort to remove Cas's pants. He was almost "trapped" by Dean... and he liked it.

"Now, this is going to feel good so… don't be embarrassed to make sounds."

Cas felt his brow furrow, but he trusted Dean. He was sure that he would know better than anyone how good it could feel. He wondered though, how it could be good enough to make him want to make noise… like, was he going to start cheering?

Before Cas could really ask questions he felt Dean's fingers brushing along the inside of his now unzipped pants. Dean seemed to just be… feeling around.

Cas was about to ask if everything was in order down there, when Dean spoke saying, "Spread your legs."

Cas followed Dean's orders and spread his legs apart, and Dean took his pants and boxers and pulled them down until they naturally stopped on Cas's spread thighs.

Castiel didn't even realize that this kind of situation might call for one to feel embarrassed, but he was very aware that he was much more exposed than he'd ever been in his human vessel. Both he and Dean seemed to examine what he had going on downstairs before Dean finally reached forward and took the stiff, twitching problem in his hand.

Dean started slowly, sliding his hand up and down the shaft in a slow rhythm. Cas gasped lightly in shock as little jolts of pleasure started firing through his body. The more Dean moved the more pleasure the angel received and Cas would have never expected this to feel so good.

His breathing was speeding up and his body seemed to break out in shivers with how good he was feeling. It was like his body was coming to life in a whole new way and Cas couldn't help but to roll his hips forward into Dean's touch. It felt so natural for him to push back into the pleasure and moving against Dean's hand made it feel even better. It was addicting and wonderful and overwhelming and it made Cas begin to worry. Was this normal? He didn't want to upset Dean but damn… he could hardly help himself.

Dean felt the angel tensing up and leaned in closer. "You're okay. This is supposed to happen." He said and he began to feel Cas relax a little again. This was all so strange and new.

"How does it feel?"

Cas's eyes were closed and his brow was deeply furrowed, his mouth was open in pleasure as he tried to keep up with his breathing… "It feels… so good Dean," Cas grunted and then his brow furrowed even more. "Can you-," He looked up into Dean's eyes unsure. "Can you grip it tighter," He asked in a whisper.

Dean's body was smashed with a surge of hormones. If he wasn't turned on before well, he was now. Cas was asking him to go harder? Already?! They had just started!  
Dean bit his lip a little and complied; tightening his grip around Castiel's manhood. A noise of pleasure burst from the angel and he nodded his head saying, "Yes, Dean, like that."

God, Dean's body felt like he was on fire. He leaned more into Cas, taking in his scent, and slowly starting to speed up his tempo against the angel's erection. Somewhere along the line Cas reached forward, gripping the back of Dean's t-shirt. Castiel's other hand was wrapped around Dean's literally following along with every pull Dean gave him.

His forehead was buried in Dean's shoulder as he lost himself in pleasure. Dean seemed so skilled at this… Cas had never felt like this before. He never wanted it to end.

Whenever he could manage to open his eyes he would see Dean's hand sliding against him, just the sight of it was so arousing, it sent waves of pleasure crashing through him. Dean was touching him.

Cas moaned and started thrusting a little harder into Dean's hand. Sometimes Dean would hold still just to feel the angel thrust against his palm. His eyes would slide open glazed in pleasure as if silently asking Dean why he had stopped. He couldn't help but drink in every second.

Cas's lips were parted and his neck was outstretched, his cheeks were flushed pink and his eyes were sealed shut. It was so strange to see the angel completely lost in ecstasy, his usually serious expression melted into that of bliss. Dean licked his lips, he was throbbing behind his boxers and wanted to touch himself. He couldn't help it, especially when Cas just moaned his name.

"Dean, something's… happening, I- can feel it."

It started with small dribbles of heat that seemed to make Dean able to slide even faster. Castiel wondered why he seemed to be getting wet down there, but the way Dean was speeding up and squeezing… he wasn't sure if he actually cared. Still, Cas could feel the heat building inside him, just under his stomach.

Dean knew long before Cas started telling him, he could tell by how desperately he was thrusting into his hand. Despite Cas's warnings, Dean maintained his speed. He leaned heavily into the angel, breathing against his neck and gripping every part of him as he slid his hand back and forth.  
Cas was panting, his shoulders were shaking and his grip on Dean's wrist was getting tighter. Cas was clenching his muscles, leaning back toward the wall, showing off his throat as he moaned to the ceiling, "Dean," he groaned out, "Dean, Dean," Cas kept warning and Dean was clinging to every sound, watching every breath.

"It's alright Cas, just let it happen."

Cas was moaning so loudly, it was like it vibrated in Dean's bones. Cas was pulling at Dean's shirt and arching, mumbling all kinds of things as he sought some kind of permission from Dean to cum. Dean watched as Castiel's eyes rolled back into his head.

"I don't –" He breathed, "I don't want to hold it anymore."

Dean heard himself moaning at that. Damn, Cas was too much.

"Then don't," was all Dean could think to say and sure enough the angel was cumming in seconds. His body went rigid for a moment until it started to spill out of him, spurting as he finally let go. He jutted his hips desperately as he finished, his body quaking as Dean milked him for every drop. Cas kept his eyes closed as he gasped air into his lungs. He clung tightly to Dean, breathing heavily against the hunter's neck. It was driving Dean crazy, and he watched the angel with heavy-lidded eyes glazed in pleasure.  
"Thank you, Dean, thank you," Cas whispered over and over again. It was a little bit ridiculous but Dean couldn't help but smile. He held the angel for a few moments, before finally pulling away.

He headed straight for the bathroom to wash his hands. When he finished he spun around to find Cas standing right in front of him, clean and composed as if nothing happened.  
Dean sighed and wondered if he'd ever get used to the angel just randomly popping up in front of him.

"Dean, thank you. That was… remarkable," Cas spoke, he was much more relaxed than before and he had a slight smile on his face. "I feel much better and the problem went away."

"Like I said, don't mention it… to anyone," Dean said looking pointedly into the angel's eyes. He turned toward the bed. Now that all this excitement was over he was crashing fast.

"So that is how masturbation is performed?"  
Dean rubbed his neck. "Sort of, it'll be masturbation when you do it alone."

Cas squinted and gave an affirmative nod.  
"Dean? Do you require assistance," Cas asked suddenly nodding his head in the direction of Dean's crotch. Dean was suddenly very aware of the bulge behind his boxers.

"What- no! Cas! Get out of here," Dean huffed, heading toward the bed. He covered his crotch with his hands to keep Cas from looking. "I'm going to bed."

Dean collapsed onto his motel bed and covered himself up. He couldn't think of Cas trying to help him with his own arousal, he could barely comprehend the fact that he had just gotten Cas off…

"Sleep well, Dean," He heard Cas say and by the time he looked up over the mass of blankets blocking his view, Cas was gone.


	2. Chapter 2

Dean stood under the showerhead, massaging shampoo through his hair. Cas hadn't been back to see him about any "problems" for close to two weeks now. So Dean couldn't help but think that the angel was taking care of things himself now.

Still, whenever Sam was going to be out of the motel for a while getting something, Dean would please himself and his mind would wander from bouncing boobs to Cas gripping his arm and rocking his hips desperately into his hand.

Dean tried not to think of him in such a way, but it was nearly impossible to get the imagery of Cas panting and thrusting with lustful blue eyes out of his mind.

Sometimes when Dean touched himself he would remember the way Cas's hand hung to his, as if following along with each of Dean's tugs… He would remember those breathy moans from the angel in his gravelly voice… He would remember the pure bliss so easily written all over his face…

It was almost a shame that Cas seemed to have it all figured out.

But, at the same time, whenever Cas would pop up with useful info, or whenever Dean had to call him for something, the way the two acted around each other was… different.  
Cas stood closer, and well… Dean didn't seem to mind as much. And God, the looks.

Sometimes Cas would look at Dean like he downright wanted Dean to jump him right then and there. How was Dean supposed to deal with that kind of thing? How was he supposed to be in FBI or research mode when Cas was looking at him with such hungry eyes? He wanted to jump Cas's bones… but he always popped up when others were around.

Dean hadn't really ever felt this way about Cas, or well, if he had, he was good at pushing it far, far away. But now, now that Dean had the taste for it… It was driving him insane. He just wanted to touch him again, just once would do him and then he'd quit.

Put it to rest for good.

He just wanted to hear the sounds of Cas's moans one more time. He wanted to witness the pleasure taking over his body again… He needed to see those pink lips parted with heavy breath and inhale his musky scent while the angel clung to him on the edge of spilling over… just once more.

He needed it… he was downright craving it…  
But masturbation was all Dean really had.

They'd been too busy trying to sort out this whole monster mob case, with several more cases piling up on top of it. They barely had time for beer and babes anymore.

All these thoughts had begun to stir Dean's groin and he knew Sam was asleep. While Dean could run on 4 hours of Z 's, Sam needed more like 6. Who knows, maybe it's because he's so freakishly tall? Asleep or not, he was right outside the door, making it feel more like a task than a reward…

Dean closed his eyes, allowing his hand to drift to his crotch. Task or not, he wanted to enjoy it.

* * *

Castiel sat quietly in the motel room that the boys were sharing. The air conditioning was running softly and Sam was snoring every now and then. It was so strange to Cas how humans had to stop and close their eyes for such a long time before they could run again. He could barely keep his eyes closed for a few seconds… everything about the world was fascinating in its own little way.

He could hear the shower running and he knew that Dean was within the water. This was also strange to Castiel. If humans could just zap themselves clean and always be full of energy… wouldn't they be more efficient?

Cas rubbed his palms against his pants. He was sweating. He didn't like it when his vessel did this. Not only was he sweating but he was also experiencing a problem, much like the problem that he had seen Dean about a few weeks ago.

The angel was feeling much more anxious than normal. He'd been wanting Dean to help him again with his problems for some time now… but… he wasn't sure how to ask. Dean asked him not to bring it up anymore… and he seemed somewhat uncomfortable with the subject.

Castiel's ears picked up a sound through the door, a sound that any human would have missed. Dean had groaned within the shower, much like how Cas had groaned when Dean assisted him with his problem.  
Maybe Dean was dealing with a problem now?

The angel popped out of the bedroom and into the locked bathroom. He could see Dean's silhouette through the grungy shower curtain, his lungs filled with the steam from the room. Dean groaned again, much quieter this time, and Cas decided to make his presence known.

"Hello Dean," he said, speaking just loud enough that Dean would hear him over the hum of the water.

There was a strange array of sounds from Dean swearing and things falling to the floor before Dean finally jerked the shower curtain back to reveal his face.

"Cas," he hissed in a loud whisper, "What the hell are you doing here?!"

"I came to see you, Dean."

"Well yeah! I can see that," Dean huffed and Cas noticed that Dean's face appeared to be a little bit red, "I'm a little busy though, wait for me to get out."

"That's alright," Cas said. Before Dean could even formulate a sentence Cas disappeared from sight and reappeared inside the shower with Dean. Dean stood with his back to the showerhead, water running down his back and Cas stood against the back wall.

He was still fully dressed… and Dean wasn't sure if he should be happy or upset about that little fact. It didn't make it any less awkward, that's for sure. Dean noticed right away that the angel was looking at his body. Up and down, left and right, his blue eyes seemed to slowly sweep over him.

Dean was almost frozen in shock and embarrassment. He wasn't actually embarrassed that he was naked, Dean was quite confident with his body. It was really more of the fact that it was Cas… and that he was staring at Dean like he was a piece of art. There wasn't really lust in his eyes like Dean would've expected, it was just as if Cas was studying him.

He watched Cas's brow furrow, his mouth hanging open just slightly, like the wheels inside his mind were slowly turning. Dean couldn't help but stare as water from the shower spotted Cas's trench coat and hung to his lips, it made Dean lick his own lips without thinking…

There was a little popping sound, and Cas was suddenly completely naked as well.  
"Dude, what the hell," Dean shouted in a harsh whisper, he turned so that he was facing away from Cas. It was so difficult to deal with an angel with no sense of embarrassment.

"What Dean? Is this not correct? You are doing the same…"

"Yes, oh my god Cas, it's correct," Dean huffed. "Do you remember when I helped you with your "problem?" When I told you that it was sexual and not for normal friends," Dean was making eye contact with Cas now, trying to scare him with intensity.

But Cas was an egg that didn't have the common sense to crack, so he just squinted back at Dean while he spoke. "I thought we agreed that we are more than normal friends?"

"Cas?! What the hell? It's not normal for guys to… jerk each other off unless their like… in some kind of sexual relationship. Same with sharing a shower…"

Cas looked down at his body, almost looking ashamed. "I'm sorry Dean, I was unaware."

Dean huffed a loud sigh and turned to look at Cas again. "What do you want anyway?"

Cas seemed to suddenly look even more ashamed. "I came to ask you to help me again," he confessed, "I know I said I only needed you to show me… but I can't seem to replicate the same amount of pleasure as I received from you. Am I doing it incorrectly? I… I would like your assistance again… but, I now understand that it is out of place."

Dean felt his eyes widen. He had been wanting to do this again with Cas… right?  
Was this his last chance? Especially now that he had said all of those things… Cas would probably never ask again.

"That's because masturbating and having someone do it for you are two totally different things Cas."

Castiel's eyebrows scrunched into a hard line, his face took on the look of something like a sad puppy.

Dean was feeling all kinds of crazy things. Horny, being the top of that list. Besides that, he was also becoming very agitated. Cas had interrupted him while he was trying to… solve his own problem, and now he was dancing around the fact that even though it's "wrong" he still wants Dean to jerk him off.

"Okay, look Cas… I liked helping you out the other day. Are you hoping to make this a regular thing?"

Dean had intended to continue that sentence, maybe clarify what he meant, but Cas cut him off.

"I thoroughly enjoyed you helping me. I seem to get these problems when I'm around you

Dean… My body… it seems to desire you ..."  
Dean felt a wave of dizziness making him sway. Did Cas just say in so many words that being around Dean made him get all hot under the collar? Was he literally saying Dean turned him on?

How the fuck do you turn on an angel? Like, Dean wasn't exactly trying to seduce Cas… so… what?!

"Cas… if you want this to be a thing it has to be kept a secret. You are not allowed to ask me for help in front of Sam or Bobby, or anybody… okay?"

"Can I ask Sam for assistance?"

"Hell no," Dean suddenly snapped. Cas jumped a bit at the sudden volume change. Then he noticed that Dean's face was turning a bit red.

"I'll be the one to help you… so don't ask anyone else to… okay?"

"Okay, Dean."

Dean chewed his lip for a second unsure, he was having trouble keeping his eyes focused on Castiel's face when his body was nude and wet with shower water right in front of him.

"You uh… you wanna do the same thing as last time," Dean mumbled, Cas tilted his head to the side, squinting at Dean.

"Are there different ways of doing it?"

Dean bit the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing… He noticed Cas getting a bit disgruntled and smiled, but Cas looked to the floor.

"Just… do what you would normally do with any other human…"

Dean wondered if Cas's heart was beating as fast as his was. This was actually happening again. He was going to touch Cas just like he had the first time.

He moved until he was standing right in front the angel. The air around them became electrified as Dean leaned closer. Castiel didn't meet his gaze, his eyes were fixated on Dean's mouth. Suddenly the thought of kissing Cas consumed Dean's mind.

His pink lips were parted and stained with shower water and Dean found himself leaning closer. How would Cas's mouth taste against his own?

Dean swept forward and pressed his lips to Cas's before quickly pulling back.

Dean looked to Cas as if making sure he wasn't out of line. Cas looked at him frantically and stepped closer, reaching for Dean.

Things spiraled wildly from there.  
A bottle of shampoo clattered to the ground as they collided. Skin and shower water, teeth and lips. Cas raked his nails through Dean's hair and moaned against Dean's mouth.

Dean enjoyed kissing just as much as the next guy, but Cas must've really liked it. He gasped when Dean's tongue slide against his lips and readily opened his mouth to deepen the kiss. He couldn't keep his hands to himself and pulled frantically at Dean to get him as close as possible.

Dean couldn't help it when his hips arched forward. It sent sparks racing up his spine from the slippery hot friction of their skin rubbing together. Dean felt like he was going to explode, there was no way he could touch the angel fast enough. Their wet bodies slid together so well and Dean could feel all of Cas's body. It was just water and skin, nothing was separating them.

When Castiel's erection rubbed against his he had to remind himself that Sam was right outside and would wake up if he moaned the way he wanted to. He moaned in Cas's ear as he rolled his hips forward, rubbing their erections together more directly.

Caught up in the rush of hearing Castiel's moans had Dean practically forgetting where he was and who he was with. He was biting at Cas's neck, tugging lightly at his skin with his teeth. The walls in the bathroom vibrated when Cas let out a deep groan. The sound of it lit a fire in Dean's bones and he couldn't get enough. Cas wrapped his hand around the back of Dean's neck and gasped against Dean's shoulder. He breathed Dean's name under his breath, making the hunter's body tighten with desperate arousal.

"Shh," Dean whispered, "Don't forget about Sam."

Cas pulled his bottom lip into his mouth and nodded.

Dean reached forward, taking Cas's erection in his hand and began to slowly slide up and down his length. It was the same way he did the first time he helped Cas 'solve his problem' but with the added water rushing against his arousal the pleasure was even more intense.

Cas sucked in a breath and pressed himself more into Dean's touch. His legs spread and his hand found its way to Dean's wrist just like before.

Dean's hand was sliding so much better than it had the first time. It was almost like he was getting a more intense pleasure without the build up to it. His heart was pumping hard in his chest and all he could think about was Dean. His skin, his smell, his muscles moving back and forth as his fingers slid up  
Suddenly Cas felt horrible! All this time Dean was helping him with his problem while ignoring his own. Cas reached forward and took Dean's problem into his hand, mimicking what Dean was doing to him as best he could.

Dean froze, Cas's hand had just wrapped around him and was beginning to slide. It made Dean's heart jump. His eyes shut as pleasure began to creep up his spine. He directed Cas to slow down a little and within moments he was leaned into Cas, resting his chin on the angel's shoulder while Cas touched him.

Dean was humming and moaning under his breath, forcing himself not to overreact. It was Cas's first time doing this but it still sent an overwhelming pleasure racing through his veins.

Castiel was determined to please Dean as well as the hunter was pleasing him. He hung onto every second as he watched Dean's expressions change with his pleasure. His eyes were closed and his lips were parted as he moaned quiet praises to Cas.

Dean seemed to remember that he was still supposed to be helping Cas instead of just letting the angel please him. He began moving his hand once more until he and Cas were jerking each other in sync. Whenever Dean would speed up or slow down, Cas would do the same. With Cas mimicking him so well… pleasure overtook him.

They stayed like that for a long time until Dean started noticing that Cas's hand was breaking rhythm and stalling. Dean tried to encourage Cas to continue, but he was moaning and shivering more than he was mimicking. He watched as Cas leaned back gasping with an open mouth, completely giving up on helping him.

"Cas, your hand stopped," Dean hummed teasingly in the angel's ear.

"I- I can't," was all Cas could say.

He was surprised that Cas was lasting as long as he was. His lips trembled and he was breathing fast and hard. It wouldn't be long…  
"D-dean I," Cas breathed out. His eyes were sealed shut and his body was trembling with pleasure. "I… I'm gonna…"

Hearing the desperation in his voice, Dean reached down with his free hand to pick up where Cas had left off. He wasn't too far behind the angel himself.

"Hold on Cas," Dean said as he began to pump himself along with the angel, if he could just get Cas to wait a few more minutes then they could finish together.

Cas moaned deeply, his body was quaking from the pleasure of Dean's unrelenting hand. He was right on the line. "Dean, I can't- I need…"

Dean both hated and loved hearing the angel talk like that. He didn't want it to be over but he sure loved hearing Cas beg for release. He felt the angel tensing up. His stomach and legs clenching as he clung to Dean. Dean watched Cas's face, clinging to every ounce of his pleasure as he jerked himself frantically trying to catch up with the angel. Cas was gonna cum any second and Dean needed to finish with him.

"Dean- I-," He gasped. His hips arched forward harshly, chasing that hand pleasing him.

Dean felt him jerk and knew it was happening. He opened his eyes to watch him cum as Cas began to spill over. He felt the familiar hot silky ropes of cum hit his hand and lost it, cumming shortly after.

They held each other for a long time with eyes closed and gasping at each other while they shook from their orgasms.

Dean's eyes opened first, he had a sleepy smile on his face, like he had just gotten warm after a long day in the cold. When he met Cas eyes the angel looked worried.

"Dean, I'm sorry," he apologized earnestly. "I… I couldn't wait anymore," Cas looked genuinely upset, like he was ashamed of himself.

Dean couldn't help but laugh at how serious he was being. "Cas, it's okay. It happens."  
Cas visibly relaxed. "I held on as long as I could..."

Dean pulled away from Cas laughing, he rinsed off under the water before shutting the shower off and turning back to Cas.

"You're still new at this, you'll get better at controlling it with experience… if you're sure that this is something that you wanna make… a thing."

"Yes Dean, I rather enjoy solving problems with you."

Dean looked at Cas for a long time without saying anything… What was this? Why were they doing this? What would happen if they got caught?

"Just remember the rules okay?"

Cas nodded.

"Now get out of here before Sam catches us."

Cas smiled at him for a moment, and then, he was gone.


	3. Chapter 3

They'd been at it for a long time now, Cas and Dean, and somehow they managed to go without getting caught.

Sometimes Cas would pop in and it would be strictly business. Sometimes he wouldn't show up for a week or so because all the Heaven drama would keep him too busy. Sometimes right before he would fly off after a 'strictly business' visit he would give Dean a look, and sure enough, later that night, he would pop up with a problem that only Dean could solve.

It was so fucking hot but, at the same time, it was getting a little boring. Dean and Cas had mostly stuck to handjobs and kissing. Dean was too embarrassed to try anything else with him. For some fucked up reason to Dean, doing anything else seemed too serious. Right now they were just helping each other out… but if it went further… then what was it?

Another thing was, Dean didn't want Cas to be one of his many just passing lovers. He wanted whatever this strange sexual bond was to stay this way. He thought that if he and the angel went any further… well, it would ruin what they had… Change things somehow.

Talk about no chick flick moments…

Dean was being a regular girl about this.

But he couldn't help it… he liked Cas… more than he ever wanted to admit. And with the angel being such a virgin, he didn't even know that there were other ways that he and Dean could please each other.

For Dean though, it was getting harder to resist.

What was he going to do?!

This seemed to be getting out of control.

Dean and Sam had finally settled into their newest shared motel room. Sam, who seemed to have a thorn up his ass about this monster mob case, decided to head out to the local library for some decent internet connection as soon as they walked through the door. Sam promised to bring home some food and that he'd only be an hour or so.

Either way, Dean was now left all alone.

That is, until the sound of wings flowed past his ears.

God, what great timing, Dean hadn't seen Cas in a few days and was dying to touch him again. He walked up behind the man and slid his arms around him, burying his face in Cas's neck.

Cas grabbed at the hands around his torso and started acting like he wanted to pull away.

"Sam's out," Dean murmured into his skin and he felt the angel relax a little.

"Dean, I came with information, It's-" Cas let out a sudden gasp when Dean's hand suddenly brushed against his groin. His eyes slid shut as he got swept up in the feeling of the hunter's hand rubbing against him.

"It's important," Cas tried, already hardening as Dean continued. The angel never truly fought him off despite the fact that it would be all too easy for him to break out of Dean's hold. Having Dean wrapped around him, looking down over his shoulder while he fondled him, it was so sexy. It was almost like he was trapped and he loved the feeling.

"It can wait," Dean said, now full on groping the angel through his slacks. Maybe he'd never get over how Cas looked when his face was flushed with arousal. Maybe he'd never get over the fact that he was actually allowed to touch Cas this way.

"It seems that you have a problem anyway."

"That's your fault Dean," Cas whined.

Dean couldn't help but chuckle, he managed to find the head of Cas's dick through his slacks and when he focused on it for a few seconds Cas somewhat lost his balance and was leaning forward against a small bar that the motel room came with.

Dean decided to just keep it up. He wasn't sure why, but today he really wanted to push Cas's buttons, just to see what would happen. He stayed right up against the angel's back, reaching around him and teasing him through his slacks.

It was amusing really, just how much torture Cas was willing to take. He never said a word to Dean while the man palmed him through his pants. He just blushed deeply and chewed his bottom lip as he shamelessly pressed himself into Dean's hand. Dean wondered if Cas would let him get him off in his pants, but just as the thought crossed his mind the angel finally cracked.

"Please Dean, touch me."

What was it with this angel and his way with words? Never ashamed to say what he wanted. It was so fucking hot. Dean felt a jolt of pleasure just from the gruffness of Cas's voice. He inhaled deeply as he reached around the man, undoing his pants and shoving them downward.

He undid his own pants for good measure. He wasn't really sure where this was going today, but if Cas wanted to touch him back, Dean would give him easy access. He adjusted himself so that when he thrusted up against Cas's backside it would rub him in all the right ways.

Dean let go of Cas and started unbuttoning his shirt, touching the skin underneath.

"Cas, turn around," Dean said.

Cas did right away, looking up at Dean with blue eyes ablaze with sex. Dean forced himself to ignore the look in the angel's eyes, it was hard enough seeing Cas's like this. His skin exposed from his unbuttoned shirt, his tie askew, his boxers tented with arousal and his lips parted with his heavy breath. Dean had to stay in control of himself or he'd end up fucking Cas for sure and messing up everything they had.

He pressed his lips to the angel's neck, licking and kissing his way down while he fondled Castiel's erection. He made his way down to his nipples, swirling his tongue around them and sucking them lightly until they became erect as well. The angel shuddered immediately and started moaning. He pushed against Dean's shoulder and twisted like he wanted the hunter to stop.

"You don't like it," Dean questioned, looking up at Castiel's face. He was biting at his lips.

"I-I do…" Cas gasped.

Dean's head was spinning. He pulled away from him and spun Cas back around the way he was before. He went back to undoing his pants and made them drop to the floor. He took Cas's erection in his hand and touched him directly.

Cas chewed on his clenched fist, whining. "Did I upset you, Dean? … You turned me back around."

"No," Dean responded, biting the angel's shoulders through his coat. "I liked you better this way."

Cas looked over his shoulder at Dean for a second. Dean tightened his grip around Cas's groin making the angel bite at his lips to keep from making sounds.

"Why are you holding back, let me hear you moan," Dean spoke, beginning to tug against the angel. Dean witnessed the rare sight of Cas turning red in the face.

"Yes, Dean," was all he said.

Dean kept up the pace, trying to get the angel close as fast as he could… just so he could tease him. He pumped him quickly building Cas up until he noticed that Cas was beginning to dribble pre-cum in his hand, Dean abruptly pulled away.

Now he was just looking at the angel, watching him rock into the air with need. His bare legs looked almost strange with his coat still on and as his hips rocked his coat would sway, revealing his swollen cock before hiding it again.

"Dean," he murmured, looking over his shoulder at him. His eyes were glazed and filled with lust. Dean stared at him hungrily. "Dean," Cas repeated all too quickly when the hunter didn't respond. He couldn't help it, he was so turned on it made it hard to think.

"What Cas?"

"You stopped," Castiel complained. His hips still moved slowly, looking desperately for something to pick up where Dean had so suddenly left off.

"Yeah, I did," Dean said. He couldn't take his eyes off Cas's hips, every time he caught a glimpse of his dick he throbbed with his own arousal.

Cas stared at Dean with upturned eyebrows, pouting a bit. When Dean didn't move he started reaching for it himself, instead of waiting for Dean. Dean moved forward and blocked Castiel's hands from meeting his twitching need. He couldn't watch that, just the thought of Cas touching himself was too much.

The angel sighed in frustration. "Dean, please… please... Finish it…"

God hearing Castiel beg was stronger than any liquor that Dean could buy, just hearing the need in his voice had Dean soaring higher than a kite. He rocked forward against the angel, making Cas moan out just because he could feel Dean's arousal against his back…he just wanted him exposed, to lift that coat up, bend him over this mini bar and fuck him.

Dean took Cas's member back in his hand and began again. Making the angel shiver in his grasp. He moaned encouragingly when Dean nuzzled against his neck, licking and biting at the skin.

Cas moaned out his name, and Dean thrusted against his back again, rubbing against him and his stupid coat. He felt drunk, Cas was making him drunk… all the noises and all the friction… it was too much.

Dean pulled Cas as much into his body as he could, and with his free hand he reached forward and began to stroke his torso. He squeezed at his nipples and kept his pace on his manhood so slow that there was no way Cas would cum.

It was making the angel produce the most intoxicating noises. His deep voice vibrated in his bones. He whined Dean's name and pushed himself back against Dean's straining erection in his pants.

No. Don't do that because God, Dean wanted to fuck him so badly.

"Dean, please…," Cas begged again, his hand wrapping around Dean's in an attempt to convince him to move faster. "Stop teasing me."

Dean had to take a breath to stabilize himself, Cas was driving him insane. He began to pick up his speed. Cas's blue eyes slid shut and his hands were clenched into fists. He and Dean rolled their hips forward in unison, both panting open-mouthed in pleasure.

Dean continued to slide his free hand up higher and higher until he was touching Cas's lips and slipping his fingers into the angel's open mouth. He rubbed his fingers against the roof of Castiel's mouth, making the angel moan and shiver even more.

Cas seemed to like anything Dean did to him, no matter if Dean found it somewhat strange or not. One thing was for sure, hearing his broken cries of pleasure through Deans fingers was even hotter than just hearing them at all.

Dean was finding it easier and easier to slide his hand back and forth against his length and Cas let out a low whine. Dean knew that the angel wouldn't last much longer.

Cas was rocking heavily into Dean's hand and Dean was caught up in his wave, rocking along with him. Dean couldn't stop now, it was a rhythm, and Dean was becoming overwhelmed with Cas's voice calling as he thrusted. He was already going nuts with the friction against his straining erection. He was feeling it too, that heat growing in his stomach.

"Dean, I need to…"

Dean felt his eyes rolling back as Cas warned of his closeness. It only made him want him more. It only made him rock harder. His body was tightening, his heart racing. He needed it.

"Dean… I-"

Dean didn't say anything because he liked to watch the angel squirm as need overtook him. His eyes were glazed over and he couldn't stop the desperate jut of his hips. Cas turned his face toward Dean who still had his head resting on his shoulder while he touched him. His eyes were closed in concentrated bliss as he tried to warn Dean of the heat overtaking him. His mouth hung open around the unformed words.

Dean was too lost in his lust but he briefly wondered what the angel would do if he didn't say anything, how long would Cas hold back if Dean didn't give him permission or denial at all? He gripped Cas tighter just to feel his erection throb in his hand. Dean wasn't sure if he could wait much longer either, it was too hot. His lungs felt like they were constricting and he couldn't breathe. His heart was pumping so hard he could barely think.

"Please, Dean… I must…"

"God dammit Cas," Dean moaned, he was overwhelmed. Just hearing Cas beg like that… he lost it and suddenly Dean was cumming, jerking and spasming hard unto Cas's back as he finished. He moaned against Cas's shoulder, his trench coat pressed into his cheek.

God, he hated the feeling of cumming in his pants, but damn it felt so good. Cas must have taken Dean's cumming as an unspoken okay for him to finish as well, because he was cumming into Dean's hand in minutes, rocking and whispering things Dean couldn't quite understand.

The two stayed huddled against the bar and each other for a good few minutes… sweating and panting… before Dean finally found the strength to pull away.

Damn, that was a hot one. Perhaps the hottest one so far… well, maybe not… the shower had been pretty hot… Dean smiled.

Cas magically cleaned himself up, but Dean had to walk over to the dresser to find a new pair of underwear and pants to wear. He began to change, using a nearby towel to clean himself up, while the angel watched him.

Cas sat down beside him on the bed, leaning against Dean without saying a word. Dean looked over at the angel silently sitting beside him before pulling on his fresh pair of jeans. He sat back down and looked at Cas.

"You alright?"

"Yes Dean, that was quite unexpected."

Dean smiled and let his memory replay the sweet sound of Cas begging him. Dean was going to come back with a witty comment but when he met the angel's gaze, he knew that it was back to strictly business. When Cas told Dean everything that he had originally wanted to say, Dean felt stress beginning to weigh him down.

"I'm glad we solved some problems," Cas finally admitted, "because I don't know when I'll be back… It may be a while."

They looked at each other for a long time.

"I'll miss ya, man," Dean said suddenly, the words spilling out of his mouth. He mentally kicked himself.

"I'll miss you too Dean." Cas smiled down at his lap, his eyes crinkling with his happiness. Dean could only blush like an idiot and hope that Cas didn't notice.

"For now, I must go."

And before Dean could really say goodbye, Cas was gone. The bed still slightly sunken in from where he sat.

Well fuck, there was that. All that fun and now he was gone for who knows how long…

Why was Dean so upset anyway? It was just Cas… Still, he couldn't help the sadness that suddenly weighed him down.


	4. Chapter 4

Dean had had his eyes on her all night. She was dancing around the small bar with a short skirt and a low cut top that was driving him insane.

He knew that she was feeling it too, the electric tension between them. He felt it zap through him every time her eyes met his before quickly darting away.

He would have her; it was only a matter of time before he would have her.

Perhaps he should've thought of Cas… but he didn't. The angel never even crossed his mind. Not when he called Sam to arrange an empty hotel room, and not even when she plopped into the Impala, filling his baby with her sweet scent.

No. For whatever reason Cas didn't cross his mind until the very end…

She was a loud one, and it made Dean feel like he was doing an excellent job. He had her laying on the bed on her back, while he stood at the end of the bed. With his feet firmly on the ground, he was able to aim right for her sweet spot and fill the woman with pleasure.

Her breasts bouncing and Dean dizzy with lust and just  _thrusts_ away from finishing… that's when Cas crossed his mind and even that's just because he popped into the room.

The girl he was nailing… Damn, what was her name…? She never even saw him. Her eyes were closed, mouth open, back arched, she was way too far gone to notice the man appearing out of thin air. Dean saw him though. He heard the sound of wings whooshing past his ears, he felt his body tense up, and when he turned his head just slightly… there was Cas.

It was only a few seconds, but it was enough. Cas had his head tilted to the side as Dean thrusted into the woman, his blue eyes traveled Dean's body in lust and confusion. He seemed to focus on where Dean was thrusting into… talk about embarrassing… and then his eyes traveled up Dean's stomach to his face.

When their eyes met there was some much bewilderment… so much arousal, so much betrayal… all coming from the angel. Dean gasped but before he could think he was cumming. He'd been right on the edge when the angel came in and the girl… she squeezed her muscles around him so hard that he lost it. It was all happening so fast, he wasn't even sure if this was real…

His body took over then as he was overcome with pleasure. He trembled and opened his eyes as soon as he could… but Cas was already gone.

Cas smiled to himself. Finally, he was back on Earth.

His father's wonderful creation…

The angel took in a gulp of fresh air. Sure it wasn't fresher than anything he'd ever breathed in on heaven, but… perhaps the slight pollution… the traces of just cooked meals… the smells of sweat… the bits of human existence that lingered in the air… they brought such life to this earth, and it made the air here something that Castiel loved.

Not only was he finally out of heaven and back on God's green earth, but he was going to get to see Dean.

It had been such a long time since Cas had seen him, he wanted to talk, to listen and hear his gruff voice, see his face and those bright green eyes…

To problem solve… goodness; it had been a long time since he'd done that. He could hardly wait to get Dean's rough hands on his body, to feel that rush of pleasure and the heat overtaking them both… he yearned for Dean's touch.

The Winchester's weren't always easy to find, but Cas had his ways… and when he finally did find Dean, Cas was a bit… overwhelmed.

His rock hard body, glistening with sweat, his eyes closed in bliss, his penis filling up the woman he was thrusting into… It assaulted his eyes all at once, and it almost seemed too harsh to be real.

He was solving problems with her… that was very clear to Cas. The rest didn't make much sense.

What was this exactly? He was… within her? Pushing a piece of his body into hers over and over?

Why had Dean not pushed that piece of his body into him? Was this something only men and women could achieve? Did he not wish to be within Cas?

Well? Perhaps he was wrong? Perhaps this wasn't a more  _advanced_  way to problem solve… maybe they were doing something else. But that couldn't be true, Dean was making all those sounds, those lustful noises he made whenever he thought Cas wasn't really listening… he was making those for her…

Cas's skin prickled with anger and betrayal… was he not good enough for Dean? Had Dean purposefully kept this… next level of problem-solving from him? Was he not comfortable enough to go further with him?

And if so … why? He and Dean had been solving problems together for so long now… and now Dean had found someone else… ?

Cas saw Dean's body tense up and suddenly they were staring into each other's eyes. Dean appeared utterly overcome with guilt.

Cas tilted his head trying to determine exactly what was running through Dean's mind. Why did he look so guilty? Why did he tell Cas not to solve problems with others if he was going to use others to solve his…?

Cas felt his mouth open to say something, but he was overwhelmed again when Dean was suddenly crying out in pleasure. The woman had helped him solve his problem…

He watched Dean crumble into his own pleasure. His back arched back and his eyes rolled closed… Cas felt anger again… This woman… filling Dean with such pleasure, such bliss… and she, receiving that same bliss from Dean when she knew nothing of just how special Dean Winchester really was…

She did not deserve to know Dean in such a way…

Cas fond his broken and battered soul within the flames of hell and set him free… and yet this woman was the one being rewarded by his pleasure? He chose her… or did she cause the problem for him herself…?

Cas clenched his fists and looked to the floor, he flew from the room before Dean could open his eyes…

He couldn't handle seeing that dopey smile that would play across the hunter's face after he came down from the high. He didn't want to see his pleasure hazed eyes looking into that woman's eyes like Dean would sometimes look at him. He didn't want to hear that faint laugh of relief when Dean made a comment about how much better he felt…

Those were Cas's things; things that Dean was only supposed to share with him.

Then a horrible thought danced across the angel's mind. It was his fault. Dean did this because Cas had been away for too long. He needed someone else… and went out and found one…

God, was that even real? Or was he just seeing things?

Cas had been gone for a few months, did he really just pop back in just a few solid moments before Dean was cumming into some woman he didn't even know?

Dean held his head in his hands.

If so… what did that mean for the two of them? Cas was the first person he'd been constantly intimate with in years. Did he just fuck it up by not thinking and sleeping with a floozy?

Dean gritted his teeth, he'd been caught before by other lovers, he'd had women disappear never to be heard from again, he'd had women destroy his car and scream and scream and scream at him before finally leaving, but this… somehow this was much worse. Unlike a lot of those girls, Dean really cared about Cas…

So… why? Why didn't Cas even cross Dean's mind?

Hadn't Dean been the one to flip out when Cas even suggested he try asking Sam or Bobby to help him with his little "problems"? Didn't Dean have something close to a small heart attack when those words came out of Castiel's mouth? The idea of sharing him, the idea of someone else pleasing Cas… it made him want to explode in a rush of fury…

As soon as Dean requested that Cas not ask anyone else, the mere idea left the angel's mind and he never brought it up again. And Dean knew that Cas never even imagined asking anyone else again…

This is how he repaid him?

Dean felt like such an asshole…

He and Cas had never even gone all the way, and the first thing the poor guy sees after being gone for months is Dean cock deep in some chick…

Dean shook his head and huffed, which, of course, earned him a strange look from Sam.

"You alright," he asked.

"Yeah, yeah…" Dean said, waving his brother off.

He wasn't sure when he'd get to… but he really needed to see Cas…


	5. Chapter 5

It took two days. Two, long, horrible days.

He and Sam finally wrapped up the whole "monster mob" ordeal. They managed to take out all the monsters involved and they were even able to solve one other case that they had fallen behind on. Finally, they were all caught up and in a strange limbo of waiting for word from either Heaven or Hell to spring into their next case. But for now, all was quiet… all seemed clear.

Sam was flipping through a newspaper in the Impala while Dean waited in the little hotel's lobby. He returned to the Impala with two separate room keys.

"All out of doubles," Sam said as Dean tossed him his room key. Dean started the car and drove them over to their rooms.

Gee, that boy was smart as a tack wasn't he?

The truth was, Dean just needed some alone time to talk to Cas, but Sam didn't have to know everything now did he? So he lied and told his brother he was right.

"There might be a case two states over," Sam said, "looks pretty bloody. Want to head there in the morning?"

"Sure thing, but for now… sleep," Dean said, smiling at his brother while wagging his room key at him. It was a little past 10 p.m. and wrapping up those cases had Dean beat… but he knew that his mind wouldn't rest until he set things right with Cas.

"It looks like vampires, so it should be an in and out kind of deal. Once we find the nest and all…"

It seemed to take forever for Dean to get Sam to leave and go to his own room. His eyes were drooping as Sam was pestering him with questions and wanting to re-live the big fight… Jesus, did he have to pick today to be a clingy little brother? Normally Dean would be fine with this kind of thing… but Sam had his own room to go to… and Dean was having trouble staying awake as it was… he needed to talk to Cas before he crashed.

When Sam finally left, Dean locked the door and walked over to sit on the bed.

"Cas," he called out. He'd been waiting to speak to him all day. "I'd like to see you, Buddy. If you're not too busy can you pop in here?"

Dean kept his eyes closed for a long time, waiting to hear the sound of wings, but it didn't come.

He sighed and opened his eyes looking at his lap. Maybe Cas wouldn't come at all… and hey, Dean deserved that… but damn, he wanted so badly to explain himself.

"Cas… I really want to explain to you what happened…," Dean whispered this time, and sure enough… the sound of wings.

When he lifted his head, Cas had his back to him.

Relief surged through Dean's body, Cas had actually shown up!

Dean stared at Cas's back, looking at his long trench coat and his dark hair… The angel stood as still as a statue. Dean slid off the bed and stepped toward the angel. He had to stop himself from grabbing Cas and hugging him… He wasn't sure how he would be feeling… most likely anger but he wasn't totally sure.

"Cas, I'm so glad you came," was all Dean could think to say. He stood close to the angel and yearned to touch him, but kept his hands to himself.

After a few long moments of silence, Cas finally turned around.

Dean fell into an apology, rambling off something he'd probably said to plenty of lovers in the past. He couldn't tell what Cas was feeling… he looked confused and hurt… and there was a little bit of anger there too… It made Dean feel uneasy.

"Cas, I'm – I'm so sorry man. It won't happen again."

"Dean… Am I not sufficient at problem-solving?"

Dean felt his eyebrows coming together in confusion, then he understood. He wanted to correct him, tell him that it should be "lover" and not "problem solver", but god, Cas was so clueless… and if he ever did slip up in front of the others… "problem-solving" wouldn't get him into trouble like "lover" would.

Dean chuckled, he couldn't help it. The phrasing was adorable and the weight of the question was awkward… Then Dean felt himself blush…

"Uh, no Cas… You're just fine at… problem-solving…"

Dean watched as Cas absently rubbed his lips together, his eyebrows came together in a familiar squint of concentration.

Where exactly did "just fine" land on the scale of good or bad? Cas didn't know…

Dean watched the angel closely, waiting for him to speak. Cas looked up at Dean searching his eyes for an answer for a long time before actually asking it.

"Is "just fine" good or bad, Dean?"

Dean rubbed his face in irritation and embarrassment.

"God dammit Cas, this has nothing to do with how good you are!"

"Then why did you seek a replacement?"

Dean felt something similar to getting knocked off his feet. The angel was shooting questions back at him so fast that he felt like he needed to find his footing. Cas had been dwelling on this… Dean really messed up…

Dean huffed with guilt and irritation… "I didn't "seek a replacement" Cas, I got horny and made a bad choice. I'm sorry."

Cas stared at him in confusion for a long time.

"You didn't seek a better problem solver because of my skill?"

"No Cas… I didn't"

"Dean, you entered her."

Well, that wasn't what Dean was expecting him to say… Dean tilted his head, trying to follow Castiel's train of thought.

"Um, yes… I did…"

Awkward…

"Why have you not entered me? Is it impossible for two men to…," Castiel trailed off, squinting at Dean.

His question was shrouded with innocence. He seemed like he wasn't quite sure what he should be asking, but Dean understood.

Dean swallowed thickly, "I mean… I could… I've never… done that… before…" Dean said looking at the ground.

Embarrassment had him rambling about how weird it might be and how he wasn't sure if he would be any good at it. Finally, Cas cut him off.

"Dean, I want you to enter me."

So forward… so sure… Cas even seemed to puff out his chest a little bit with that statement.

God, how was it that this angel got away with such a lewd mouth?

Dean swayed a bit on his feet, feeling like the wind had been knocked out of him.

"W-what," Dean must have heard that wrong…

He'd wanted to enter Cas… Of course he wanted to, but for some reason he just couldn't. It seemed more serious than their typical hand job and what if Cas got too attached? What if he wanted something more serious? Dean and relationships did not go well together. He'd already almost ruined this once.

"Dean, why did you not tell me that we could go further in our problem-solving?"

"Cas I-" He faltered. His brain was talking louder than Cas was. Could he even go through with it?

Cas had a stone cold look in his eyes that seemed to refuse to take no for an answer. Could he and Cas even really do it? Wouldn't God smite him right then and there?

"You and that woman went further than we ever have and you didn't even know her…"

Dean stared at the ground.

"Dean… I feel very possessive of you and I don't understand."

Dean looked into Cas's eyes again. Red flags were flying up all over his brain.

Relationship! Relationship! Abort, abort, abort! Cas was sounding more and more like he was about to go a "chick flick" and confess his love or something.

Castiel took a few slow steps closer to Dean.

"I was very angered that you found a replacement with that woman… and I… I want to feel what she felt Dean."

"What are you talking about Cas-"

"I want to feel you inside me."

Dean felt his body heating up and his brain slowing down.

"Cas, wait, I don't know…"

"If you teach me how to be better at solving problems… then you won't need to replace me with others."

Dean turned away, "Cas… listen to me! I shouldn't have done that… I wasn't trying to replace you… I just… I fucked up. Listen to me Cas," Dean repeated although Cas never looked away. He turned to face the angel once more.

"… I don't want to replace you. That girl… I don't even know her name… She doesn't mean a thing to me."

"Do I mean something to you, Dean?"

Dean rubbed the back of his neck, suddenly feeling very exposed. He was so far into the red zone he felt like he was slipping under.

Did Cas mean something to him? Yeah, he was an important part of the team, and yeah, he was like family… but could it be more?

Family sure never lusted after each other like this.

"Yeah, I guess you could say that."

"Then please, Dean, teach me more. I want to feel you inside me."

Again with that, it was amazing how straightforward Cas could be.

"Cas-"

"Dean…"

Dean suddenly felt the desperation in Castiel's voice. It was like Cas needed this.

"Give to me what you gave to her."

Dean felt himself shudder. He didn't want to just give him what he gave her… he wanted to give him more… that's why he'd been holding back for so long. He didn't want this to be meaningless sex that led to a dead end, but the look on Cas's face… the plea in his voice.

Would it ruin their relationship if he didn't do this?

If it was Cas… He could do it. Right? He always gave in when it was for Cas…

"It-it may hurt… it's different for men than it is for women… as and it's your first time…"

Dean spoke while moving closer to Cas. He couldn't look him in the eye… it was too embarrassing.

"I can handle it," Cas whispered, looking up at Dean.

Dean felt his throat dry up, Cas was looking at his lips instead of his eyes. There was heat between them, a tightness of wanting one another. His heart was pounding against his chest painfully. He wanted this so badly but... If this fucked things up…

Dean closed his eyes, he was going to do this…

"Don't you leave me," he said. His expression was pained but he was blocking as much as he could. He knew he couldn't handle losing Cas and if the angel wanted to take things further then… he needed to know… he needed to hear him say it.

Castiel's eyebrows shot up in shock at the mere thought.

"I would never," Castiel said and just like always it was blunt and true.

That's was good enough for Dean. In that moment he snapped and lunged forward, grabbing Cas and kissing him roughly.

It was all breaking loose now and he was kissing so fast and hard that Cas was gasping and struggling to keep up. He moaned against his mouth, readily taking everything Dean gave him. He wrapped his arms up around Dean's shoulders, letting Dean lean him back to deepen the kiss.

Dean felt like he was spinning. Castiel's lips tasted so good and he couldn't get enough, he directed Cas toward the empty motel bed as best he could, but Cas was anxiously tugging on Dean's clothes and hair.

Whenever Dean would try to move he'd get fully distracted by Cas pulling back and licking at his lips. His bright blue irises peeking out from beneath half-lidded eyes when he opened them just enough to catch a glimpse of Dean's face before diving back into the kiss.

They collided with an end table first, knocking things to the floor as he shoved Cas onto it. He pulled his shirt open sending buttons all over just to get his hands on his skin. Cas was moaning already, his voice deep and desperate in Dean's ear. His skin was soft and toned and rising and falling against Dean's hands with his rapid breath.

Dean's teeth were tugging lightly at his neck, pulling intoxicating moans from the angel. His hands were on Dean's back, gripping his shirt, clawing at him for more. Fuck. Not here, not here.

Dean pulled Cas up again, pushing and kissing him until his legs finally bumped the mattress. He fell backward onto the bed looking up at Dean in complete shock.

It was adorable, that goofy look of surprise all over his face, his cheeks a gentle pink and his mouth open as he breathed heavily. Dean couldn't help but chuckle. He slid out of his button-up shirt as he climbed over top of him. He went back to kissing at Castiel's neck, feeling the slight roughness from his stubble poking through his freshly shaved face as he led Cas to lay down.

Cas moaned and leaned his head to the side, giving Dean all the room he might need to terrorize his skin. Dean gasped hotly against his skin when he felt Cas palming at his erection through his jeans. He pulled back just to see it for himself before meeting Cas's gaze. Dean's eyes slid closed at the feeling, nodding to Cas in silent agreement as he undid his button. His zipper was undone in a second and Cas was pulling him out, running both hands up and down his shaft. Dean spread his legs and let the angel touch him, moaning gently and whispering praises.

Cas was speeding up and squeezing, working both his hands so well. Dean was rocking into it, feeling so good, lost in the fingers kneading his hard skin. He let Cas touch him until it got a little too dangerous, then he placed a hand on Cas's wrist, stopping him.

"If you keep that up… I won't last that long inside of you."

Something lit up in Cas's eyes, and he took his hands away…

"Then please Dean, hurry."

Dean nodded and leaned down over the angel. He slid his hands down Castiel's body as he licked and kissed his way down.

He bit and kissed around his hips, sending zaps of pleasure right up Cas's spine. He nipped and teased around his groin before finally licking Cas's shaft.

The angel arched at just how good that felt. Dean slid his hands down further, lifting Cas's hips and sliding his fingers up until he rubbed over Cas's entrance. He rubbed his finger over the tight circle a few times, pressing against it.

"Dean," the angel breathed out in question.

"You want me to enter you… right," Dean asked, blushing a bit. He avoided Cas's gaze.

"Yes, please."

"Alright, then… I need to do this first…"

Or at least that's what he thought, he was sure he'd heard it somewhere, right? Dean wasn't really the expert in gay sex… but he remembered learning about the prostate and how men received pleasure from it… and he figured… well, this hole was tighter right? He was just gonna loosen him up… no big deal… He remembered that he had lube in the drawer of the end table near his bed so he grabbed it and coated his fingers.

Cas agreed all too easily and stayed still while Dean rubbed over the hole again, pressing until his finger began to slide inside of him. It freaked him out a little, he wouldn't lie… but Cas was taking in these desperate little breaths and making small noises of pleasure. His response was enough to keep Dean going.

It wasn't long until his finger was sliding in and out easily, he added a second, stretching him as he did.

It didn't really hurt Cas; it was just pressure in a place that he wasn't used to… Cas stayed as still as he could but he was so overwhelmed. Part of Dean was inside of him… He wanted more.

Dean began pushing his fingers deeper, bending them and-

"A-ahh!"

Cas's entire body throbbed suddenly, overcome with a harsh wave of pleasure. He squeezed against the fingers inside him, trembling as Dean continued to finger that spot.

"D-dean," he practically begged.

Whatever that was… it felt amazing. Cas tried to form words to ask Dean to come inside, but all he could do was release strangled moans of pleasure before getting out a "please."

The sound of it was so needy that Dean shivered and his dick throbbed.

Cas trembled and moaned so deeply that it felt like it was vibrating in Dean's bones. Dean was throbbing again, desperate to get inside. He could barely think clearly as he retrieved his fingers and aligned himself with Castiel's entrance.

"Okay Cas, hold still," Dean breathed out.

He quickly coated himself with lube before beginning to push himself inside. Cas's eyes rolled shut and his back arched up off of the bed. Dean had to hold his hips still as he pushed his way inside.

Cas moaned Dean's name over and over and over until Dean was drunk on the sound of his voice. He began to thrust, unable to keep self-control, moving both him and Cas with each push. Cas didn't seem to mind though, his voice was filling the air and it barely took any time at all before he was pushing back against Dean's thrusts. His thick thighs gripping tightly around Dean as he moved in and out of the angel.

Dean felt like he was going to explode. Just hearing Cas groan like that, hearing him whine out his name, it was putting him over the edge. How was he going to last with Cas crying in pleasure beneath him?

He didn't think he could, so Dean leaned over Cas and pressed their mouths together while he thrusted. Instead of moans, Cas's mouth hummed against his.

Dean did what he could to focus on the kiss, but he was overcome by pleasure and the heat of Castiel's body. Before long he was pulling away to focus on thrusting.

Cas could hardly help himself, this pleasure was so much more than he'd ever experienced before, and the mere fact that it was Dean within him, giving him this pleasure... He and Dean… they were one.

Cas felt like he was melting into the blissful heat and could hardly hold himself back. He was lifting his hips and pulling Dean in more and more like a pro. Dean's hips were jutting so fast and hard, pounding that spot within him. He was so overwhelmed by the pleasure that he was slammed by his sudden closeness to finishing.

He twisted beneath Dean's weight, biting his lips, "Dean- I'm- I'm gonna…" He gripped the sheets, overcome by the need to let go already.

Dean thrusted deeper, "No, not yet," Dean said, his voice deep with sex. He suddenly reached down and tightly gripped the base of Castiel's dick, just hard enough to cut off the sensation and keep Cas from being able to finish. The angel twisted more, pushing desperately against Dean's thrusts as his body yearned for release.

"Dean! D-ah! Ah-!"

He moaned as the pleasure overwhelmed him, he'd never wanted to cum more than he did in this moment. He felt as if his entire body was vibrating hard against a line he was so close to crossing, and Dean was still thrusting, still grunting, still moaning, still pumping that pleasure into him. He wanted more, but his body, his vessel, was so overwhelmed.

Another wave of desperate closeness flooded the angel and he was sure he would cum. "Dean – Dean! C-cumming."

He warned and begged all at the same, Dean's fingers squeezed him a little tighter, pushing down around his dick.

Cas melted into a sobbing mess of pleasure, unable to cum. The need was aching deep within him, making his body throb as he twisted and stretched and thrust hard against that hand like he was trying to somehow force it between Dean's fingers.

The heat was filling up his dick and aching in his muscles with nowhere to go. It was throbbing so hard it was almost painful.

Dean felt Cas's muscles squeezing around him, he was lifting his hips more and more, arching up off the bed. The more Cas lifted himself the easier it was for Dean to thrust deeper and deeper.

He could feel the heat growing, threatening to spill over, but he was not ready for it end. Now that he was finally here within Castiel's tightness, feeling his muscles, feeling the heat… it was like the animal had been released within him and he couldn't get enough.

"Oh- mmm! It's too- m-much, I need… Dean… I need," Cas sobbed, clawing at his back and arching upward. His neck was stretched back toward the headboard and his thighs were trembling, desperate from how they strained against Dean.

Dean's eyes rolled shut as he fell into the absolute bliss of Cas begging him for release. He refused to remove his hand and let the angel cum. Not when his voice sounded so good begging for it, not when he squeezed his muscles like that, desperate to spill over, not when each thrust was lined up so perfectly and felt this good.

Cas's voice only seemed to get louder and louder as he twisted beneath him. Dean opened his eyes to catch a glimpse of Cas writhing in pleasure, but noticed something else instead.

Castiel's eyes were wide open and beginning to glow a blinding blue and large black shadows were beginning to spill outward from his arched back. It took Dean a few moments to realize that the shadows were his wings and Cas was practically glowing beneath him.

Dean felt like he was going to burst into flames, Castiel was so overwhelmed with pleasure that's he going full blown angel on him!

As the angel's skin began to glow the heat of Castiel's body spread through Dean starting from his hips and branching outward through the rest of his body. Dean lost every bit of control he had left and was thrusting harder than ever as his body was overwhelmed with ungodly amounts of pleasure. It's so intoxicating that Dean could hardly breathe and he was moaning and cursing and closing his eyes trying to block out the blinding white glow Cas was giving off.

Cas's body began to vibrate hard around Dean's dick like an expensive toy and when the bed began to shake beneath the two of them Dean couldn't handle anymore and lost it. He removed his hand from Cas's dick and shouted as he came harder than ever before in his life. Cas practically burst as he came untouched. His voice rippled through the room as he spilled over in a hard rush, quaking with his orgasm.

Castiel's cry was mixed with the high pitched sound that Dean could only describe as the ringing he would get in his ears after rocking out to Metallica too loudly.

Dean collapsed onto the bed beside him, draping his arm over Castiel's nude waist now wet with sweat. For a long time the only sounds were of Cas and Dean gasping for air and the occasional whisper of "holy shit," under Dean's breath.

Dean felt like he couldn't move, and hell, after that he didn't want to. He looked at the angel laying next to him. His eyes were still wide open and he looked fearful.

"Cas, you okay?"

Castiel's eyes suddenly met Dean's. "Dean?"

"Yeah?"

"May I request that you no longer solve your problems with anyone but me?"

Dean laughed a little bit, but he was too tired to really get into it. Truthfully he'd been waiting for that request. He was going to answer but Cas kept talking.

"I understand that you enjoy fornicating with women… and perhaps it's rude of me to be so selfish… but…"

"Cas, it's fine. Only you from now on."

Castiel smiled. It was such a deeply genuine smile that it made Dean close his eyes and smile too. Cas was such an idiot sometimes…

Dean stared at the angel for a long time while his eyes drooped, after last night's hunt and that workout… his energy was zapped.

No more sex with anyone else but Cas... That sure sounded a lot like commitment… a lot like a relationship...

Cas smiled at him again, "You should rest Dean, I'll watch over you."

Dean let out a breath and the tension left his body, his eyes falling closed. Perhaps a relationship wouldn't be so bad...


	6. Chapter 6

Dean's body relaxed more and more as he stared at the angel beside him. He felt at peace. He and Cas had talked, his mess up with that woman was forgiven and he had committed himself to Cas and Cas only.

It was scary for him but somehow he was okay with it, or maybe he was just too exhausted to realize the weight of his decision. Either way, in this moment, he was happy.

His breathing slowed to a deep rhythm and he wondered if Cas would be there tomorrow when he woke up… he wouldn't mind waking up next to those bright blue eyes.

Just as he was about to let his eyes close for good a loud banging spilled out into the room.

"Dean! Dean?! Did you hear that?! Did you  _feel_  that!? I think something is going down!"

It was Sam and he was freaking out by the sound of it. Dean actually pouted a little bit, he just wanted some goddamn sleep.

"Dean?! Are you alright?"

"Sam I'm fine, go away!"

The door burst open and Sam came tumbling into his hotel room. All the oxygen left Dean's body as he was sure in that moment that he'd been caught. He was laying here, drenched in sweat, on his side, with a good portion of his ass exposed in an attempt to cool off from the sex he'd just had… but most importantly he was lying next to Cas who was also naked and sweaty and exposed!

He shot a look to where Cas should've been laying beside him… but the angel was gone.

"Oh God, really," Sam called out in frustration bringing Dean back to reality.

"Where are your clothes," Sam asked. He was covering his face a bit like a child before finally spinning around to face the door he'd just come through.

Served him right for just barging in. Dean made no move to cover himself up. Even if he wanted to his exhausted muscles wouldn't let him. He pressed his head against his pillow and shut his eyes, trying to block out his brother.

"Dean, did you hear that? It sounded like an angel's voice… And that little earthquake? Something must be going down. I think we should investigate."

"Sam I'm not getting up…"

"Dean! This could be something big! What if an angel just got killed or something?"

"Big whoop Sammy, it'll wait till morning."

Sam spun around to protest but was once again slapped in the face by Dean in all his naked glory, "God Dean…"

"Go to bed Sam!"

Finally, his little brother left, slamming the door behind him.

"Fine, I'll look into it tomorrow, with or without you."

"Don't be such a bitch, Sammy."

He heard a muffled, "Jerk," as his brother walked away.

"Cas?"

The angel popped up as soon as the word left Dean's mouth.

He was fully clothed and seemed well put together, although he obviously had sex hair. Dean smiled to himself.

"Yes, Dean."

Dean felt his eyes burning, and his eyelids drooping. He didn't care how damn girly it was… he wanted to lay next to Cas…

He lurched forward and grabbed the angel's coat sleeve and pulled him into bed with him.

"Please don't poof away again… I wanna talk to you."

He more meant in the morning when he could think straight, but Cas thought he meant more right then and there.

"Alright Dean, what do you wish to talk about?"

After a long silence Cas turned his head. He then realized just how much Dean had managed to wrap himself around him… He had one leg up over him and an arm draped around him as well. He was breathing deeply with his eyes closed. His lips were parted and already he had slipped into a deep sleep. Whatever it was Dean wanted to talk about it would have to wait.

* * *

 

Last night had been weird, that little earthquake, the high pitched sound his ears rang with… and the fact that he woke up in the middle of the night just to realize that he was starving… (although he was sure that last one was unrelated.)

Nothing, however, could've prepared him for what he saw next.

Sam was determined to figure out what all that racket was last night, and before he went off on his own to investigate, he figured he'd try again with Dean. Hopefully this time he was at least covered up.

Sam took his time getting a shower and doing his morning routine, so by the time he made it to Dean's room and opened the door, he was surprised to see Dean still snoozing hard.

It definitely wasn't like his brother to sleep this long.

As he walked up on the bed, calling out his brother's name, what he found… well… let's just say nothing could've ever prepared him for this moment.

Dean was totally out, eyes twitching and snoring gently, but as crazy as it was that he was still asleep that wasn't the kicker. Castiel was lying on his back fully clothed with a completely naked Dean  _wrapped_ around him. His blue eyes were wide and full of fear as Sam came up on them, and it was so outrageous that Sam burst out laughing.

"Cas!"

"Hello, Sam."

Sam practically doubled over and lost it. "What are you two doing?!"

"Dean is resting and I am… laying here."

Sam started making ugly high-pitched squeaking noises from laughing so hard. It was enough to make Dean stir, he tossed a pillow at Sam without even fully waking up.

"Sammy shudup, I'm sleeping," Dean slurred.

This, of course, only managed to make it worse. What the fuck was Cas doing laying in bed with his naked brother?!

And holy fuck, last night when Sam barged in on Dean and he was all sweaty and naked… and he had that "I just got laid" smile all over his face… Oh god, there was no way. His laughing got even louder.

"Sammy what the fu-"

Dean sat up in his bed suddenly putting all the pieces together, his moose of a brother was straight up rolling on the floor laughing and Cas was as red as a tomato and staring blankly at the ceiling.

The only thing Dean could think to do was deny.

"What the hell Cas?!"

Dean jumped out of the bed.

"What the hell are you doing?!"

Cas jumped out of the bed as well, staring at Dean with wide eyes, looking hurt.

"Dean I-"

Dean rushed over to him, shoving lightly against him and whispering "Go, just go, I'm sorry… go."

Cas stared at him for what felt like forever to Dean until the words made sense in his mind, then, Cas flew away.

"Sam, what the hell," Dean shouted. He grabbed his clothes from the floor and used them to cover himself a little. "Don't come barging in on me like that!"

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean to ruin your morning cuddle session with Castiel!"

Oh god, Dean wanted to beat the shit out of him.

He really did ruin it too, it wasn't funny.

"Sam! Pull yourself together! Are we gonna investigate or not?!"

Playing it off like he was angry, Dean stormed off and slammed the bathroom door behind him. He threw his clothes to the floor.

There was no telling how much time that would buy him.

Dean washed his face, he was planning on taking a shower anyway, but he still did it out of habit.

When he spun around Cas was there, staring at him.

"Jesus Cas, please don't do that to me," Dean growled out.

"Dean, I apologize, you asked me not to leave, I didn't know what to do."

"It's alright, I'll handle it."

Dean wiped his face on a nearby towel. He ground his teeth and paced around the bathroom a little as Sam's laughter seemed to seep through the door.

"Perhaps it wouldn't be so bad if Sam knew?"

Dean sighed. Cas was probably right, Sam was pretty understanding about well… everything… but Dean liked this little game he and Cas were playing.

It was their little secret… something only he and Cas knew about. Letting Sam in on the joke… well… it just seemed to take some of the fun out of it. And well… if Sam knew things felt  _even more_  serious…

Dean liked things the way they were. He still needed time to get used to the idea of being in this relationship in the first place before blabbing about it to everybody he knew. Still, he didn't know how he was gonna talk his way out of this one.

"I know," Dean finally said. "But I like it being our little secret."

Cas looked to the ground. Aside from the whole Sam ordeal, Cas was acting a bit different than normal.

"You okay?"

"Dean… last night… I lost control."

Hell yeah you did and it was so fucking hot, Dean thought immediately and if it weren't for the look of concern on Castiel's face he might've said it too.

Dean smiled a little at the memory of last night and pulled out his toothbrush. "It was fun, no big deal."

"Dean…"

Dean looked at Cas, examining him.

"You could've gotten hurt. I think maybe we shouldn't do it that way anymore."

"Hey come on, don't freak out. It was my fault for not letting you cum."

For some reason, Cas turned bright red. Dean smirked while he brushed his teeth, eyeing the angel through the mirror.

"I did not like that…"

"Ah come on, you know it was amazing when you finally did."

Cas flashed his teeth in a brief smile. "Yes, I suppose."

Dean rinsed his mouth out and grabbed the angel in a sudden hug.

"I really enjoyed seeing you like that… your wings, you… the real you… glowing through the pleasure… and God Cas, at the end when you starting fucking  _vibrating._ That was the hottest thing I have ever experienced in my entire life."

Cas was turning an even deeper shade of red. Dean was still naked and running his hands up and down Cas's back. Cas pushed himself into Dean, feeling his body and wanting more.

"Dean, I'm having a problem…."

Dean kissed at Castiel's neck, grabbing at his ass. The words the angel spoke didn't really register though. Dean may have been feeling the angel up, but after last night he was spent. Any other time touching Cas like this would send tingles of lust straight to Dean's dick, and sure even now there was a tingle or two, but his dick might as well be waving the white flag of surrender… there was no way he could get it up for anything good.

So naturally, it didn't occur to Dean that Cas might be feeling a little bit different. So, he just kept fondling him, making Cas make quiet noises that Sam wouldn't hear on the other side of the door. (If he was even there anymore.)

"Dean please," Cas mumbled. "It's been up since late last night… laying next to you and not being able to touch you…"

His bright blue eyes were pleading. Dean reached around and rubbed Castiel's crotch through his pants. His mind was blown to find a hardness there.

"Cas, there's no way I can get it up to fuck you. I'm still wiped from yesterday."

Cas didn't seem to be paying much attention. His hand was holding the elbow of the arm that Dean was using to rub against him. He wanted it… he didn't care how… he just wanted it.

"Then… can we… do it like the very first time you helped me?"

Castiel's body was like fire, and Dean was drawn to him like a freezing man on a wintery night. He couldn't get enough of him.

He pushed Cas against the sink where he had just washed his face and quickly undid his pants. He rubbed against Cas's underwear, squeezing his erection through the fabric.

The angel was letting out quiet little mm's and ahh's as Dean slid his hand into Cas's underwear, fishing him out. He took his length in his hand and began to stroke him.

God, he wished he had it in him to flip Cas around and nail him right here. He wanted to hear his voice reverberating throughout this bathroom, intensified by the porcelain. He wanted to feel Castiel's heat squeezing around him once more. He wanted to feel him vibrate around him when his body literally couldn't take anymore.

Dean may not have been physically turned on, but his mind was downright torturing him. Maybe angel's were like women? Able to fuck basically whenever they felt like it?

"Dean, what's taking you so long in there?"

Sam was banging at the door. Dean froze for a second and Cas's eyes opened. His heart was pumping now because he thought he'd been caught.

He looked to Cas for a moment before winking and starting to stroke him again, Cas's eyes slid closed to the bliss once again.

"I'm trying to shave Sam, will you go the fuck away?"

Dean took his free hand and began to roll Castiel's balls around between his fingers. Cas's mouth opened, but no sound came out. It seemed to be a silent moan of approval. Dean slid his fingers up, lifting Castiel's leg and running a finger over his entrance. Cas gasped loudly causing Dean to shush him right away.

Maybe he couldn't fuck him… but he could finger him.

"Fine, please hurry though. We have things to do."

Dean huffed. Sam was really sucking all the fun out of this lately. And if he managed to put it together that all that angel ruckus last night was because of Cas being royally fucked… well… Dean would be in a really embarrassing situation.

Finally, he heard the sound of his brother's footsteps retreating and heard his motel door shutting.

Alone at last.

Dean turned his full attention back to Cas, he retrieved his hand and used the sink to get his fingers wet before going right back to pushing against his entrance.

"You want this," Dean asked just to be sure.

"Yes," Cas breathed as Dean pressed inside him. He began to slide two fingers in and out.

Cas held onto him tightly, using both Dean and the sink to keep himself standing. His arm was around Dean's neck, his leg around his waist and the sink was pressing into his back but he was focused on those fingers pressing their way deeper.

Cas reached down and began to stroke himself in time with Dean fingering him.

That was so hot to Dean, seeing the angel touching himself. He released a shaky breath at the sight of it. He pressed his fingers in harder, bending and searching for-

Cas let out a heated gasp, his hand stopped for a second from the sudden wave of pleasure flooding him.

Things picked up from there. His voice was vibrating off the walls just like Dean had wanted. His hand was stroking himself quickly and Dean was rubbing and bouncing his fingers, desperate to see Cas cum.

"Come on buddy, come on," Dean was whispering in Cas's ear. He felt Cas's body tensing up and knew it would happen soon. He pushed his fingers harder, watching the pleasure take over his face. His eyes were closed, mouth open and eyebrows drawn into a hard line. He leaned his head back, gasping to the ceiling and fogging up that mirror behind him.

"Dean," Cas spoke. His voice was deep and gruff and throbbed through Dean's body.

"I know," Dean said, never slowing his actions. He watched Cas's cock now, red and disappearing with the rise of Cas's hand.

With a hard thrust, it happened, spilling out of Cas in a hot rush. Dean focused his fingers on the spot, pressing into it as the angel jerked and came, collapsing against the sink behind him.

He was taking in big gulps of air to steady himself as his orgasm throbbed through him.

It may not have been anything compared to the bliss he felt last night, but pleasure looked so damn good written all over Cas's face.

Dean washed his hand off and pulled Cas close.

"I can't wait to take you again. Don't forget how good last night felt."

Cas breathed heavily in Dean's ear and blushed. He nodded, feeling completely spent. Without Dean hugging him close it was possible that Cas wouldn't be able to stand at all. He was fine with Dean holding him up, he enjoyed the attention.

After Cas had gotten his breathing and all that back under control he left Dean to do his morning routine.

The fun part wouldn't start until Dean had to deal with Sam again… stuck in the Impala…. On the road… with no escape…


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know the whole "the more angels partake the lower their tolerance gets," isn't canon but hey, it's a fun idea. It's fanfiction right? I just want a little wiggle room, I'm making it as close to canon as... I want to make it. I was gonna say as close as possible but that isn't actually true. Haha

Sam thought he was something clever.

The two of them wandered around the little hotel looking for more evidence about last night's "angel disturbance" only to find nothing, but Dean was 87% sure that Sam already knew what had happened.

He wasn't going to say anything about it though, hopefully Sam didn't think what Dean thought he was thinking…

But now, while on the road to their next case over in Iowa, Sam was doing that thing.

That thing he does where he just lets Dean drive without saying anything, that thing where he sings along with the radio or plays around on his phone, and doesn't say a word about the weirdness hanging in the air.

Nope, he waits for Dean to start a stupid conversation about the weather or his car, and then he drops the bomb. And for god sakes, if Dean doesn't walk right into it every time! He just can't help it, it's natural for him to want to talk… it makes the car rides go faster, and unlike Sam, he doesn't dwell on the elephants in the Impala, he just wants to forget them.

So, whenever he's not thinking about whatever thing it is that Sam is trying to catch him on, Dean talks and Sam pounces.

But not fucking today.

Dean has his lips sealed and he will not mess this up. Sure, Sam might just ask him outright, but not if Dean can help it.

So the two have been sitting quietly, listening to old CDs and the sound of the wheels on the road, with Dean not talking and Sam doing that thing.

What Dean didn't think to avoid though, were traps.

And well… maybe Sam is clever after all.

Dean's watching the yellow line of the road as it slithers along, and just when he thinks he might see a deer or something Sam chuckles to himself. And without thought Dean asks, "What?"

Might as well slam into the nearest tree Dean, it would be less awkward.

"I was just remembering the look on Cas's face when I caught you two in bed together."

Dean literally gritted his teeth and swerved a little on the road. He gripped the steering wheel for more control and laughed nervously.

"Haha, yeah, what's up with that angel anyway… Cas is such a weird little guy."

Dean could feel Sam's eyes staring at him so hard it felt like the skin on his face was peeling off.

"Yeah, I'll say, why would he do that anyway?"

"Like I would know! You should just ask Cas yourself!"

"Ask me what?"

Both brothers jumped at the sudden third voice in the car. Cas had appeared in the back seat. Dean cursed under his breath.

Sam chuckled lightly and smiled at Cas, "Why were you in bed with my brother this morning?"

Cas looked out the window, "I do apologize for that Dean, I understand that my actions were inappropriate."

The angel and the hunter made brief eye contact in the rearview mirror. Dean wasn't totally sure where Cas was going with this. What if he messed up?

"It really wasn't that big of a deal," Dean mumbled.

"Okay," Sam butted in, "But that doesn't really answer the question."

"I've been quite interested in humans and their needs lately, I've watched over both of you while you've slept before... and I was curious to experience it for myself. I didn't realize it was so unacceptable to lay with him."

Dean squeezed his lips together and snuck a look at Sam. Cas was lying so well it made his skin crawl… and for a moment even Dean believed him. Sam, for some reason, looked guilty.

"I mean, it wasn't  _that_  inappropriate, it just really caught me by surprise. It was quite a sight."

Dean caught a glance of Cas smiling and looking down, it made him feel hot. They were so close to getting caught… but at the same time, they were getting away with it.

How was that even possible?

The three sat in a strange silence for a long time, once the weirdness seemed to go away Cas flew off leaving Sam and Dean to the rest of their drive.

When the boys arrived in town and settled into their little motel, they were pretty sure that they were dealing with a nest of vampires, but these vamps were pretty decent at covering their tracks. The boys suited up in their FBI gear to get some hints as to where they may be.

Dean and Sam stood on opposite sides of the room, facing away from each other as they dressed. Ever since Cas had popped into the Impala Sam had been incredibly quiet. Dean could tell he was thinking about something, and just as he was about to open his mouth to ask, Sam spoke.

"Does Cas really not get… how sexual he can be," Sam asked.

Surprised, Dean looked up from his tie. "What do you mean?"

Sam cleared his throat and looked unsure, before sitting down to put on his shoes.

"Just that… him laying in bed with you while you were naked… and I don't know… He's asked me questions…. A long time ago," Sam seemed to think for a long minute, before continuing. "Does he really not get it?"

Dean's heart began to beat a little bit faster, he thought back to the first encounter with Cas and his seemingly budding sexuality. He had literally come to Dean with a boner asking for help. Had Sam encountered something similar? Had Cas asked him for help first before he had come to Dean?

Heat spread up Dean's neck and made his skin feel tight.

Dean cleared his throat, "What did he… uh, what did he ask you, Sammy?" Dean tried to keep his voice even. He tried to focus on the tie he was holding between his fingers but he couldn't think. It just didn't make sense to him anymore.

"Like I said, this was a long time ago. Like when we first really got to know him… we were standing somewhere and we saw this couple making out," Sam kind of chuckled awkwardly at the memory of it.

"He started asking me about why humans kiss each other… when I explained it to him he seemed intrigued… and later… he asked me to kiss him."

The stupid tie that Dean had been working so hard to fix dropped from his fingers and flopped against his chest. Dean turned toward Sam with a look of pure shock. Sam, who was still tying his shoes, blushed lightly and didn't look up to meet Dean's gaze.

Oh god, oh god. Sam and Cas had made out?! Sam and Cas had made out! Dean had gotten his brother's sloppy seconds?! No! No! God no!

This had to be some kind of payback for the girl Dean had hooked up with a few nights ago.

_Okay, Dean, breathe… There's no way Sam would make out with Cas… and come on! If they did Cas surely would have told you by now!_

But what if he wouldn't? Dean had snapped at him pretty hard when Cas mentioned going to Sam for help about his 'problems'… Would he have hidden it from him because of that?

Anger flooded Dean's body, making his hands form into fists, as images… terrible, terrible images… of Sam and Cas kissing flooded his brain.

He thought about how the simple act seemed to excite Cas so much… How Cas liked to curl his fingers into Dean's hair… how he liked to get as close and passionate as he could while they kissed…

Did he do that same thing with Sam?

Did he look up at Sam with bright blue eyes and a straight face when he asked for a kiss without a trace of embarrassment?

Did Sam feel the heat and the magnetic pull? Did the thought of making Cas feel something he had never experienced before excite him to no end?

Dean's eyes zeroed in on the blush on Sam's face.

"OH MY GOD SAM! DID YOU?!"

Sam's face snapped up to meet Dean's gaze, "What?! No Dean," Sam laughed, then he seemed to notice how worked up Dean was and squinted at him with a tilted head. "I told him why it was weird and he backed off."

Feeling caught Dean grabbed his tie again and spun around away from his brother. He felt like an idiot, was he trying to blow their cover?

The Stanford Moose would surely catch on if Dean couldn't keep it together.

Even if Sam knew, he didn't say anything.

* * *

 

"Dude's breath was awful," Dean muttered as he and Sam left the police station.

"Yeah, that's what you smell like when you get extra onions on your burger."

"Dude no," Dean scoffed.

"Dude," Sam replied with one of his many bitch faces. "Yes."

Dean was about to fire off a comment about Sam's constant bitchiness when he slammed right into something.

"Hello, Dean," that something slurred.

"Son of a bitch! God fucking-! Cas! What the hell is your problem," Dean squawked, when he ran into Cas he somehow managed to slam his nose into his friend's statue-like structure. Sam, of course, laughed loudly.

With his hand over his nose Dean glared at Cas, and that's when he realized… Cas was totally drunk.

What the hell? It was barely six o'clock and Cas was swaying on the sidewalk with red cheeks and a goofy smile.

"Cas, are you drunk?"

Cas huffed like he was annoyed before nodding.

"Dude, the sun is still up, and you're plastered? What the hell Cas, why?"

Cas leaned heavily against Dean, looking up at him. "Dean," the angel suddenly said. "I'm having a problem."

Dean's face flooded with blush, he was too shocked to speak. It was like his brain slammed on the brakes and left him frozen.

Sure Sam or anyone else standing around wouldn't really know what was being said, but here they were standing in front of the police station with Cas hanging on him and announcing that's he's horny.

"Dean, did you hear me?"

Bright blue eyes stared up at him, his hair was disheveled and his coat was twisted, and he was moving closer and closer to Dean until Cas was basically hugging him. He felt the angel's waist move against his and Dean did feel a hardness there making it even more difficult for Dean to function. He stood like a broken robot with his mouth flapping open and closed.

Sam clapped Dean on the back. "I'll say you're having a problem Cas, you can barely stand up! Why are you so drunk?"

"I wanted… I wanted to see what it was like," Cas slurred. His eyebrows were scrunched into a hard line like he was trying extra hard to concentrate.

"Cas you've been drunk before."

"Yeah, and it wasn't this bad either," Dean finally spoke, seemingly recovering from his previous shut down.

"Angels are not meant to partake… their tolerance gets weaker each time they drink." Cas absentmindedly touched Dean's tie, rubbing the fabric between his fingers.

His eyes were wide open with his pupils dilated and God… he was standing so close to Dean… His smell was sweet and intoxicating…

Dean looked to Sam for help.

"Okay Cas, but why are you drunk right now?"

"Is a reason required to partake? You two drink all the time…"

Cas started to move toward Sam now, there was a dip in the sidewalk that his drunk ass didn't see and he tripped, falling into Sam's chest. Time seemed to slow down and there was this moment of Cas looking up at Sam with a shocked expression, and Sam smiling down at him. It was every definition of a chick flick moment, and it made Dean's stomach turn.

The images of Sam and Cas kissing started flooding him again. His chest tightened when their eyes met and he could barely keep it together as Sam asked Cas if he was alright, while steadying him and smiling. Dean practically lunged forward to peel Cas off of his brother.

"Sam," Cas mumbled, "your hair is so soft. Dean… why isn't… why isn't your hair as soft as Sam's," Cas asked.

At that point, Dean had managed to pull Cas away from Sam a bit and now he was looking up at Dean with those wide blue eyes, his lips parted and his hands clinging to Dean's arms.

"Okay," Dean said, the fuse of his temper was really starting to run out. He didn't know how much more irritation he could take. "I think we've had enough fun for the day. Let's get you back to our room."

Dean pulled one of Castiel's arms over his neck so he could lead the angel to the Impala.

"I can fly there! Dean, I can fly there," Cas kept saying, he was acting like he was trying to pull away but only managed to take his arm off of Dean's neck.

"No Cas, okay? Stop. I don't need your drunk ass flying all over town. Get in the car."

Cas went willingly into the back seat… but he ended up more lying across the seat than sitting.

" _Do not_  hurl in my baby, or I will end you," Dean snapped as he climbed into the front. It barely took any time at all to get over to the motel but getting Cas out of the car… was another story.

Somehow the angel got his foot tangled up in the seat belt, and was too drunk to get it loose. Dean had no choice but to stand there and try to untangle the giant baby in a trench coat. When he finally freed him Dean pulled his head out of the car, "Okay, come on Cas, get out."

Cas, who was flat on his back, leaned up and reached for Dean like he wanted him to pull him up. Without really thinking about it, Dean leaned back into the car and reached for Castiel's hands. Cas grabbed Dean's hands, but instead of letting Dean help him Cas yanked hard making Dean fall into the Impala on top of him.

"Cas! What the hell?!"

His voice was gruff, and his sapphire eyes were half-lidded and ablaze with lust. "Dean," Cas whispered.

That's all he really needed to say for Dean to understand. His blood started pumping faster and he felt those dangerous tingles of sexual excitement starting down his spine.

Dean's breath caught in his throat.

Holy shit, Cas was so sexy, and how hot would it be to fuck him right here in the Impala? Baby's brakes squeaking in time with Dean's thrusts… the leather… the sweat… and Cas… begging to finish with glowing eyes and moaning so loud that Baby's windows would burst.

Heat raced through Dean's body.

"Dean, this problem… it's aching."

"Cas stop," Dean hissed, blushing hard. "Sam is here and we need to get you inside."

"Dean, I want you inside."

Holy fuck, Dean started to scramble, he couldn't handle Cas coming on to him this strong, but damn, it wouldn't be the first time he'd had to replace the windows in the Impala… Cas shifted a little beneath him and made a sound.

Dean needed to get away from Cas immediately or he would end up fucking him right then and there. He ducked out of Castiel's arms, forcing his way out of the car.

"Dean what's taking so long," Sam asked. He had run a few snacks and things that they had bought earlier to the room and was now back with a concerned look on his face.

"He's drunk Sam," Dean huffed. "and he's being impossible."

Cas practically fell out of the car and grumbled "I am not being impossible," under his breath. Sam quickly got behind the angel and steered him into their room. When they got inside Sam dumped Cas on to Dean's bed.

"Sam!"

"Well! I don't want him in my bed. Besides," Sam smiled, "he likes sleeping with you."

Dean huffed, "What are we going to do? What about the vamps?"

"I guess it'll have to wait, their attacks are pretty spaced out… we should be okay."

"Sam…"

"Dean I don't know what you expect me to do. I can't snap my fingers and make him sober."

Dean popped open his own bottle of beer. He hated leaving a job unfinished… especially when they were this close.

"Look, I'm a little hungry, why don't I get us some food? That should help him sober up."

Dean nodded, looking at Cas who was laying on his back and staring at the ceiling.

"I might swing by their nest and stake it out for a few hours too… just to make sure that we got the right place."

"So you're telling me that you're gonna leave me here to babysit Cas, while you go out and hunt?"

"I'm not hunting Dean, I just wanna make sure we got the right place. I can't handle that many vampires by myself."

"But Sammy, why do I have to be the babysitter, this is the kind of stuff I make you do."

"Sorry bro, he likes you more. More profound bond and what not," Sam took the keys from Dean's hand. "I'll be back in a few hours, with food."

Dean followed Sam to the door as he headed out. "I want extra onions, no bitching. And pie!"

The driver door of the Impala slammed shut and Dean caught sight of his brother rolling his eyes. When Dean turned around he found Cas standing at the foot of the bed loosening his tie. He wondered when the angel had managed to stand up.

"What are you doing?"

Cas swayed on his feet and his trench coat fell off his shoulders and hit the floor.

"I'm burning up Dean."

Cas suddenly flopped back onto Dean's bed. He was now barefooted and only wearing his button-down white dress shirt and black dress pants. Dean swallowed thickly. It was strange to see Cas without his normal attire, almost like his eyes were lying to him.

God, Cas was driving him crazy, he wanted to pounce, and with the way the angel was acting, Dean was pretty sure that Cas wanted him to pounce too. It just felt odd, knowing that Cas could barely walk straight because he was so drunk… like he was taking advantage of him or something.

Dean sat on the edge of the bed.

He felt like he was being ridiculous… it wasn't like Cas was some random drunk girl at a party, they knew each other… and he knew that Cas trusted him. But when he was this drunk… something just didn't feel right. Dean looked at the angel breathing a bit heavily on his bed.

"You know you're slowing us down on this hunt, right," Dean asked, taking a swig of his beer. His tone wasn't harsh or rude, he was simply asking.

Cas sat up slowly, "I know, I'm sorry Dean, I've been irresponsible."

Dean turned more to face the angel.

"What made you decide to drink today anyway?"

"Dean, I have come of age."

Dean laughed. "Dude, I know you're older than 21, you're older than like… 2000…"

Cas squinted at Dean in confusion.

"No Dean, I've reached my sexual prime."

Dean stared at him, not quite understanding what he was saying. "Okay?"

"Gabriel once described it to me as being like an animal in heat… I am going through that Dean," Cas huffed, his eyes meeting Dean's shocked gaze.

"I'm going into heat."


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It just kind of seems weird to me that Cas says he "... doesn't sweat under any circumstances..." in canon. Oh well, it wasn't that way when I wrote this!  
> Also I know that Cas says he does not have a gender in canon but I want this to be gay so the gay is gonna stay! Haha, also that's kinda what makes the whole "angel mating" thing work. It all gets explained, my friends, so don't worry!

Once again, like a robot with frozen gears straining to move, Dean’s brain froze.

Cas was telling him he was in heat?! Wait a second… angels _go_ into heat?

What the fuck?!

Why would God make his own creations go through a horny phase? Weren’t angels supposed to be sacred creatures?

At the same time it seemed to make sense… humans were born from humans so angels were born from angels?

This was so messed up.

“You’re… in heat…,” Dean asked. He had to repeat it to himself just to try to grasp what Cas was saying.

“Yes, Dean,” Cas replied. He absently rubbed his forefinger back and forth along Dean’s knuckle. Dean noted just how touchy he was when he was drunk. He and Cas were sitting at the edge of the bed in the hotel room, he had one leg tucked up under the other and he was staring intently at him.

“My problems have been coming more and more frequently… and you’re always so busy… I thought drinking would help… but instead it has made it much worse,” Cas slurred a little as he spoke. Dean wanted to laugh, of course drinking would make it worse.

“How… how long does this whole “heat thing” usually last,” Dean asked. He was having a rough time paying attention to Cas when he was trying to wrap his mind around this.

“Angels are different than humans… and since I am male… my longing to mate will last much longer than say… a female’s might. It can last for years… Although they say the first few months are really the worst.”

Cas started unbuttoning his shirt, spreading the fabric and letting his skin breathe. Dean felt his skin tighten as his eyes zeroed in on Castiel’s skin slowly coming more and more into view. That’s when Dean noticed just how much Cas was sweating. Dean licked his lips. Cas really was burning up... He was in _heat._

_Years… Cas could be going through this for years…_

Dean cleared his throat and slid off the bed, he just needed to get away for a second. He headed toward the fridge to grab Cas a bottled water. Cas was just sitting there, undressing and sweating… He was really afraid he was gonna lose it. Cas was being a real tease... When he turned to take the water to him, he was standing there behind him.

“Dean, how long do you intend to ignore me,” Cas asked flatly.

Dean swallowed, trying to clear the thickness in his throat. “I’m not ignoring you, I was grabbing you some water. You’re sweating.”

Castiel’s eyes were ablaze again as he moved closer to Dean.  He took the water from Dean’s hand and set it on a nearby counter.

“I do not require water.”

“Cas,” Dean said, automatically taking a step back away from the angel.

“I require your assistance.”

Castiel’s eyes flicked to Dean’s lips where they stayed entranced.

“Cas, it’s just weird because you’re so drunk…”

Cas stepped forward one last time, leaving barely any space between the two men.

“Dean.”

God, Cas had such a way of saying his name. The weight of it, the need within it…

“You do not wish to assist me with this?”

Dean licked his lips again. He inhaled deeply as the angel began to lean forward. He could smell the alcohol on Cas’s breath.

All this was happening so fast. They were in a relationship, Sam had very nearly caught them and now Cas was going into heat?

Dean chewed his bottom lip as Cas got closer.

Everything was spinning more and more out of control and all he could think about was Cas leaning in closer. Dammit, he needed to stop and think for a second.

Dean was having a hard time controlling himself. He let his arms wrap around Cas, running them down his back, pulling him close. The air in the room felt tense and hot. Castiel was staring up at him hard, the intensity in his eyes alone was making Dean’s head rush.

Just kissing him a little wouldn’t hurt… right?

Cracking under the pressure Dean leaned forward, his nose brushed against Cas’s cheek and Cas turned, their lips meeting. Dean kissed slowly, driving the angel wild, he didn’t care how anxious Cas was, he wanted to take his time.

Cas had put him through a lot of shit today anyway… he almost broke his nose when he slammed into his drunk ass outside the police station. Then he was humiliated by Cas announcing his ‘problems’ in front of Sam while hanging all over him in public and then there was Cas pulling him down on top of him in the Impala…

Dean licked against the angel’s mouth making him groan. Cas wrapped a hand around Dean’s neck and pulled him closer, angling his head to kiss just right. The only sounds were them pulling apart to breathe until Dean finally pulled back for good. Cas’s eyes snapped open.

“Dean,” Cas grunted deeply, moving closer to try and recapture Dean’s lips.

“Cas, you really embarrassed me today… several times… in front of Sam.”

Cas was staring at Dean’s lips again, to the point that Dean wondered if he was even listening to him.

“Dean, I apologize,” Cas muttered, his eyes flicked into contact with Dean’s for a moment before fleeting back to his lips, “I did not intend to embarrass you.”

Dean pulled Cas closer to him with a quick jerk, their bodies bounced together lightly. He spoke directly into Cas’s ear, causing the angel to shudder against him.

“That’s because you were only thinking about yourself,” Dean whispered.

He reached down to rub against Cas’s crotch. He was rock hard behind his slacks and Cas gasped out in shock at Dean’s sudden touch. Dean rubbed him slowly, savoring the look on Cas’s face.

His eyes were closed and his mouth was hanging open allowing small sounds to escape.

Since Cas was so focused on his own needs Dean decided that he was going to use it against him.

He would overwhelm him with pleasure and make him beg for it.

He’d push Cas to his limits and make it so release was all he could think about. If Cas was going to beg him for it then he wanted to make it good.

Dean leaned Cas back against the kitchen counter while he undid his pants. “I think I need to punish you.”

Castiel’s eyes grew in distress “P-punish?”

Dean slid his hands into Cas’s pants, rubbing against his underwear.

“Pa-please,” Cas begged, he held onto the arm pleasing him, encouraging its touch. His voice cracked with arousal, “Dean, don’t punish me.”

Cas leaned his head back as Dean got a hold of him and began to stroke him through the fabric. He squeezed along the shaft, moving the fabric with him as he pulled against the hardened skin. Every third or fourth time he would include the head of Cas’s dick as he stroked.

Cas’s breath was already labored, his eyes slid closed as Dean kissed against his throat.  He loved seeing Cas with his head thrown back in pleasure.

“If I don’t punish you, you’ll never learn.”

A wild grin spread across Dean’s face as he spun Cas around, leaning him over the kitchen counter. Cas stared over his shoulder with a pout.

Cas could’ve easily shoved Dean away or hell… he probably could’ve pulled some kind of angel mumbo jumbo to force Dean to help him… but instead, Cas was just staring at him with a deep look of longing. It made Dean feel powerful. Cas was putty in his hands.

“Dean, please,” Cas groaned out, his voice was deep and gravelly and filled with need.

Dean got up behind the angel and placed his hands on Cas’s hips, he pulled the angel back against his waist.

“Please what,” Dean hummed in the angel’s ear.  

He watched Castiel’s eyebrows draw together and then Cas suddenly got the idea to push back against Dean, rubbing his ass against Dean’s crotch. Dean swallowed, shamelessly pushing his hips into the friction but forcing himself to stay in control and not make any sounds. Heat and pleasure spread up his spine, but Dean stayed perfectly composed.

“Hmm,” Dean asked again as he smirked against the angel’s ear.

“Please,” Cas panted, “ _please,_ touch me.”

Cas took Dean’s hand and slid it straight to his dick before proceeding to thrust his hips against Dean’s palm and fingers. Dean moaned lightly. He couldn’t help but form his hand around Cas’s dick, letting the angel thrust into his hand.

They were caught grinding against each other with Dean’s mouth nuzzled against Cas’s neck. He was inhaling Cas’s sweet scent laced with alcohol. He felt Cas’s throat vibrating against his lips with each deep, needy groan.

Dean watched over Castiel’s shoulder, savoring the roll of Cas’s hips as he thrusted into his grasp. He’d never get enough of this.

He was burning up as more and more arousal pumped through his veins. He longed to get Cas back to the place he was the last time they fucked. He wanted to see that glow, hear his voice and see those giant wings as they spread and stretched out across his back. He wanted to push Cas to the edge… get him so overwhelmed that his body began to vibrate hard with the need to release...

Dean moaned again before pulling away from Cas and dragging him across the room to an empty bed. Dean practically threw Cas down onto the mattress before crawling over top of him.

Cas stared up at him with wide eyes while Dean unbuttoned the angel’s shirt before leaning down over him.

Dean licked and kissed at Cas’s skin, making goosebumps spill out all over his body. He pulled the angel's skin into his mouth, biting and sucking small bruises that would easily be hidden later. Cas was gripping Dean’s shirt and twisted beneath him whimpering, “Dean, I’m sorry, please… stop torturing me.”

Dean smiled against his skin, “What’s wrong Cas? Don’t you like it?”

Cas twisted more, and Dean noticed that he was rubbing himself through his pants. He moved Cas’s hand away causing Cas to huff in frustration.

Cas was basically a whining mess, he couldn’t lay still. His eyes were closed with need and he was panting like he’d just run a marathon.

Was this what it was going to be like now that Cas was in heat? Dean was barely trying and yet Cas was a wreck…

He bit at his lips… maybe he should give Cas a little more…?

“Dean, inside… Come inside,” Cas was mumbling, straining against Dean’s hold to touch himself again. He needed relief, he felt like he couldn’t breathe without Dean touching him.

Dean leaned back and started to pull off his shirt but Cas reached up and grabbed his wrist, zapping both of them naked.

Dean gasped and his heart raced with the sudden sight of Cas nude beneath him.

“Dean, I cannot wait any longer.”

Dean was beginning to feel the same way, but he wasn’t quite done playing with Cas yet. He spread the angel’s legs, moving himself closer.

He once again had to knock Cas’s hand away to stop the angel from touching himself. This time, however, he quickly replaced it with his own hand. Cas’s held onto Dean’s wrist as he stroked, following along with each of his movements. It was practically magnetic how the angel held onto him and Dean loved it.

As he stroked him he went back to work on the angel’s chest, licking and biting at his nipples. Cas moaned and gasped at the feeling, jutting his hips into Dean’s hand.

“Please… come inside, Dean,” Cas begged again. Dean smirked and grabbed Castiel’s arm and flipped him over. Once he had Cas on all fours in front of him he moved up behind him before retaking his erection in his hand and sliding his free hand down Cas’s back to his entrance.

He wet his fingers with spit and the pre-cum dribbling from Cas’s dick. Slowly he began to push his way inside and Cas seemed to expand easily, allowing Dean to pump his fingers in and out slowly.

Cas started panting and was making all kinds of noise. His body was trembling with need. Although he was moaning he still protested.

“No, no… not- your fingers…,” he slurred. He begged and demanded all at once that Dean fuck him properly. Cas was driving him insane, making him throb anxiously as he pushed his fingers deeper.

He wasn’t sure if it was the alcohol or the heat making Cas so fussy, but despite how much Cas begged he stuck to his guns. He was supposed to be punishing him for Christ’s sake… he just didn’t think holding back would be so difficult.

Cas spread his legs a little bit as Dean continued. He shamelessly pushed back against the fingers inside of him while he begged for Dean’s cock.

Dean’s whole body was on fire. The angel was coming completely apart at the seams in his desperation to be fucked. He’d never seen Cas act like this. To see the angel who was usually so put together, act so desperate… it was driving him crazy. He ached to get inside him.

He curled his fingers and prodded deeper making the angel squirm. He released a heated breath.

Castiel’s erection was pulsating in Dean’s opposite hand making Dean’s heart pound. Was he really this close?

Dean leaned over Cas’s shoulder, moving his fingers within, “Are you about to cum?”

Cas bared his teeth and shivered hard. Dean could tell he was tensing every muscle in his body. “Na-no…” he gasped.

“Cas,” Dean mused, he pressed his finger roughly into the angel’s prostate and watched as his jaw fell open in bliss. Cas was never good at holding back but would he really lie about his closeness? His body trembled and he squeezed the bed sheets beneath him.

“You’re throbbing...”

“Dean… please, I… I apologize fa-for my previous behavior… please, come inside. I-I can’t wait.”

Dean gripped Cas’s dick around the base and held his fingers still until Cas seemed to relax a little. When the threat of him cumming was gone he retrieved his fingers and slid his hands up Cas’s chest, fondling his nipples again.

Cas whined, leaning back into Dean. The hunter wasn’t quite sure if he liked his nipples touched or not.

“Okay, Cas.”

Cas looked back at Dean with wide eyes, his skin was flushed, he was covered in sweat and his eyes seemed like they couldn’t focus. Dean moved Cas back down onto all fours and lined himself up.

“You ready?”

“Yes,” Cas huffed. How could Dean even ask that when he’d been begging this whole time? “Ready.”

Dean moved forward _finally_ pushing inside. Cas moaned deeply, arching slightly and mumbling things to Dean that he could barely understand.

Dean slid his hips forward, pressing slowly into Cas’s body. As he worked to keep his hips still Cas cried out beneath him.

He was producing these beautiful, strangled moans as Dean worked his way in, shifting his hips and legs until finally, Dean was completely inside.

Dean watched in hazed pleasure as Cas’s shoulder blades moved beneath his skin while the angel adjusted beneath him.

He wasn’t really sure why, but he suddenly leaned forward and bit lightly, gnawing and dragging his teeth along the skin.

Cas moaned loudly and his body jerked and shuddered. He was gasping deeply at the feeling, clenching and unclenching his muscles.

Curious, Dean bit again, making Cas arch and moan once more. Cas pushed back against Dean, rocking his hips slightly causing Dean to slide within him.

“You like this,” Dean asked breathlessly. Finally he had seemed to find a little sweet spot.

“Y-yes.”

Dean peered up at the angel staring back at him. “Why is this so sensitive?”

Dean began to move a bit, rolling his hips forward gently. Another gruff moan fell out of Cas’s mouth.

“It’s near… my, ah- my wing.”

Dean nodded and began to pick up his pace, he placed his hands on Cas’s hips and pulled him into each thrust.

Cas was already pushing back against Dean and moaning loudly, begging and thanking him with each thrust. Finally the hunter was within him. Finally.

Dean pulled Cas closer, thrusting hard and deep, making Cas tremble. He lifted Cas’s hips and angled his legs as he thrust forward repeatedly hitting that spot.

Their eyes connected and Dean could see the angel mojo starting up behind those bright eyes. Dean gasped just at the sight of it and tried to catch his breath.

He wanted it.

“Cas,” Dean moaned out, “Show me your wings.”

He reached around, taking Cas’s erection in his hand and began to pump him in time with each of his thrusts. He was already thrusting hard and fast causing the angel to sob into the sheets in pure bliss. Dean needed to get Cas there, get him glowing…

It was working too because Cas was moaning louder and louder and his body was tensing up fast.

“Dean… So good… I’m-I’m,” Castiel moaned. He could no longer push himself back into the thrusts assaulting him, instead he held his hips still at the perfect angle allowing Dean to easily pound that spot within him. He stared up over his shoulder at Dean, watching the hunters face as he fucked him.

The pleasure was pulsing through him with each thrust and tightening in his veins. He could feel it ebbing closer.

“Dean, I’m – I’m gonna,” Cas sobbed, he wanted nothing more than to slide over the edge.

Dean was drunk on excitement and the sound of Cas’s voice. He slid his fingers to the base of Cas’s dick and squeezed, cutting off the flow a bit. Cas cried out loudly. Now he was gripping the bed sheets and downright begging.

“Dean, no, no,” He begged. “Let me.”

Cas swung his hips, desperate to find purchase. He could feel it building up behind Dean’s hand, begging to spill out.

Dean kept his pace. Just feeling Cas’s cock throbbing in his hand had him feeling that dangerous closeness looming nearer and nearer.

“Cas, just… hold on,” Dean moaned, he watched as light began to spread through Cas’s veins.

Dean’s breath caught in his throat at the sight of it and knowing what was to come.

Heat from the light of Cas’s skin flooded out through both of the men’s bodies. It was like thrusting into a fire, it was so hot…

Cas was begging more and more and squeezing his muscles around Dean’s dick. He clawed at the hand Dean was using to stop his orgasm.

“Please,” Cas was panting, “please.” His voice was laced with the high pitched ringing.

“Just a little more,” Dean groaned into the angels ear,  his hips snapping forward faster and faster. “Show me those wings… Vibrate for me.”

His voice was breathy and hot and flooded Cas’s brain. The angels eyes rolled shut as he lost the ability to fight it. He needed to cum, he needed to cum so badly it was the only thought he could think. His body started taking over then.

As Cas’s grace began to force its way out, his vessel erupted into shivers before beginning to vibrate hard around Dean’s dick. Dean burst out in a loud moan, his hips slowing down considerably to keep himself from cumming right then.

Not yet, he still needed to see those wings.

Cas thrusted forward, swinging his hips desperately to get Dean’s hand to move and relive the growing pressure in his dick. He was right there.

It all happened so fast, the room shaking and Cas’s body buzzing hard around him. Dean moaned out loudly, his face was pressed against the angel’s back and he dug his nails into the angel’s hip and pulled him closer with each thrust. Dean’s eyes were shut, his mouth hanging open in pleasure as he panted, lost in bliss.

He suddenly remembered Cas’s sweet spot and reached up to grip Cas’s shoulder blades, rubbing up under them with his fingers to feed the angel even more pleasure while he was drowning in his own, that’s when the shadow of Cas’s wings came into sight.

They spread out, lifting Dean’s hands away from Cas’s shoulders and Dean could even feel them… feathers.

Drunk and so fucking close to exploding, Dean began to pump Cas again with each thrust. He kept his muscles as tight as he could but Cas was already warning him again.

“Dean!”

Overloaded and finally able to let go, Cas climaxed. He shouted so loudly with his finish that the windows in the room burst, sending glass flying everywhere. Dean arched hard, burying himself in the angel and erupting. He shouted loudly too, unable to hold back. His eyes opened briefly just to catch sight of the glass raining from the windows.

Both men collapsed onto the bed and the room shook. They both gasped like fish out of water trying to regain composure. Dean’s energy felt as if it had been zapped… he was crumbling fast.

And shit! What was he going to do?? They’d destroyed the place!

But Cas seemed to be ahead of him. He looked like he was about to pass out but he waved his hand and somehow everything in the room seemed to magically fix itself.

Dean’s ears were still buzzing when Cas reached over to touch him, leaving them both suddenly dressed… but even then Dean couldn’t move.

He looked at the angel who was still glowing dimly. “Dean… I can’t,” Cas said as his eyelids drooped… “I need to rest.”

Dean couldn’t argue, he was glad that Cas was falling asleep because there was no way he could stay awake either.... This kind of tired wasn’t normal… he literally couldn’t keep his eyes open… he couldn’t even move…

He watched Cas pass out and tried to move his muscles… he needed to move to the other bed. Both dressed or not, Sammy would surely say something about them sleeping together once again.

Dean tried again, but his body wasn’t having it. He looked at the ceiling briefly, trying to find strength, he cursed mentally, and that was the last thing he remembered before passing out too.

* * *

Hushed voices

Harsh tones

Castiel’s eyes slid open for a few moments, but he couldn’t focus.

Dean was still out beside him, sleeping peacefully.

The room was spinning and figures were standing around the bed, gawking. They were his brothers and sisters…

Angels.

Things that Cas had forgotten, things that he should’ve known started flowing back into his mind.

Rules he should’ve followed, common sense he should have never discarded.

Dean might now be in danger because of Cas’s stupidity.

He tried to find strength… tried to push himself up… but his vessel would not comply.

His eyes blurred, and he closed them to try and make things clear up…

But the angel wouldn’t open his eyes until several minutes later… long after the hushed voices in the room had disappeared.


	9. Chapter 9

Sam opened the door to his and Dean's crumby room while juggling several bags of fast food in his hands. Normally Sam went out of his way to eat healthily, but his mouth started watering when he drove past a local burger hut that was pumping its fumes of cooking meat all over the area, he couldn't help but stop and order a good load of calories for him and his brother. He was starving; a big boy like Sam needed to eat! He fumbled with the key, trying to get inside so he could chow down.

The vamps were indeed staying just where Sam and Dean had thought, however, there were a lot more than they had originally guessed. Sam wasn't exactly sure if they'd be able to take them all down themselves…

But hey, Cas had been hanging around a lot more lately… An angel in the mix would certainly help out.

Sam set the bags down on the little kitchen table in the corner. He wondered why Dean wasn't jumping him for some food right about now… he was gone a little longer than he had planned.

Instead, when he lifted his head and pushed his long dark hair out of his eyes he found Dean and Cas laying side by side in bed.

Well… at least this time they were fully clothed.

Sam walked over, looking down at them both… Had Dean gotten drunk too and they both crashed? It wasn't like Dean to fall asleep this easily.

Sam cleared his throat, "Hey Dean?"

Dean stirred a little, but never truly woke. Cas, on the other hand, didn't even move. Sam distinctly remembered Cas telling him that angels didn't need sleep… so seeing him laying there breathing deeply seemed strange to him.

"Dean," Sam said considerably louder, and this time Dean jumped, his eyes opening.

"Wha-what? Are you hurt," Dean mumbled, bolting upright.

"No, Dean… I'm fine, what's going on?"

Sam eyed his brother closely. His skin was pale and his eyes dull… Sam thought that if he looked away for too long he'd turn back to find his brother zonked out again.

"What happened?"

Dean tried to stand but he couldn't. It was like he could feel the signals going from his brain to his muscles but his body would not comply.

"Keeping up with his drunk ass must've wiped me out… I'm just tired."

Sam gave him a concerned look, he wasn't buying the whole 'just tired' excuse. Dean rubbed his face, his eyes were burning.

"Okay Sammy," He literally didn't have the strength to argue with his brother right now. "I don't really know why I'm this wiped… Cas must've done something to me without realizing it."

Part of that was true at least. Maybe Cas was a little too drunk and did some weird angel mojo that zapped Dean's energy? He was tired the last time they had sex, but this was different… This felt like the kind of thing Sam and Dean were always on high alert about. This was pure exhaustion.

Dean looked up at his brother… then to the angel on the bed beside him.

"Let's wake him up," Dean finally said, the only way they were going to find anything out was by asking Cas himself.

Sam and Dean went to work on trying to wake Cas; they called his name and shook him… Dean even started to lightly slap Cas's face until finally, he opened his eyes.

"Dean, what," Castiel asked. His eyes rolled around in his head trying to focus.

"You passed out," Dean said.

Dean grabbed one of Cas's arms and slowly helped the angel to sit upright. Sam watched in surprise at just how drained both of them were. It took way too much effort for Dean to get Cas completely upright and once he did Cas was leaning heavily against Dean's shoulder. Their faces were close when Cas finally lifted his eyes to look at Dean.

Well damn, this was making Sam uncomfortable. His eyebrows scrunched together. This seemed like an intimate moment… The two of them leaning and gazing at each other without speaking… The way Dean's eyes seemed happier just looking at the angel. The way Cas stared without breaking focus, like anything Dean might say would be of the utmost importance.

"I'm exhausted man," Dean spoke quietly, his voice gruff and his hushed tone making it feel like it was just him and Cas in the room, "Did you do something to me?"

Sam shifted. Castiel stared at Dean for a few minutes, his mouth parted slightly and he looked like he was lost in thought… then his eyes grew in sudden realization.

"Dean," He said. "My grace must have touched you."

Sam made a face, confused. Cas's grace touched him? Why… How?

Dean kept his face passive, not wanting to give any weird ideas to his brother.

"In my weakened state, it's harder for me to contain myself within my vessel… when I'm drunk… or," Cas looked at Dean hard, heavily considering his words. "Uh… When I'm weak my grace takes energy from the closest source."

What Cas said to Dean was completely different from what Sam heard. Dean was positive that Cas was telling him that when he was in heat and while they were having sex… his grace fed off Dean's energy…

Being in heat must take a lot out of angels…

"Luckily, I can give that energy back to you."

Cas's hand wrapped around Dean's forearm. A gentle warmth started from Cas's hand before spreading up Dean's arm and throughout the rest of his body. Dean felt his entire body relax like a tight knot had come undone and relief washed through him. Dean sighed, smiling pleasantly.

"This should at least restore your energy for a few hours until you lay down to rest tonight…" Cas smiled sleepily at Dean who was beaming with newfound energy. Then Cas's tone became more serious.

"However, the fix will not last very long for me… May I stay here tonight?"

Dean looked to Sam.

Huh? Why was it suddenly _his_ decision to make? Dean and Cas were the ones who kept ending up in bed together.

"I mean we have the couch over there," Sam said, gesturing toward the beat up sofa sitting in front of the small TV. "Unless you two plan on sharing a bed. I don't really care," Sam smiled.

Cas looked back to Dean.

"The couch it is then," Dean said, standing up and stretching. He was feeling like a whole new person now that the fatigue had been lifted. The smell of that food sitting across the room was getting to him. He headed to the small table and dove his arm into the bag before pulling out a burger.

"Yours are marked double onion," Sam said sheepishly, "They didn't have pie… but I got some apple turnovers…"

"Sammy…," Dean said, smiling brightly at his brother. "You're too good to me."

Sam handed Cas a burger with the top exposed but the wrapper still around the bottom.

"Here, you eat too, this will help you sober up."

Cas was considerably more stable than he was before, but he still seemed a little fuzzy. He smiled down at the cheeseburger now in his hand.

"I have missed these."

Dean had to shove the burger into his mouth to keep from smiling like a fool. The others followed suit and the three began to chow down. God, it was so good and hot and bursting with flavor. Dean practically moaned.

"So… how exactly did your grace drain Dean's energy again?" Sam asked between bites.

Both Cas and Dean looked up from their burgers at the same time, they looked at each other for a few seconds before shifting their gaze to Sam… staring at him with wide eyes and chewing mouths.

"Cas's grace wasn't contained as well within his vessel while he was drunk… So… I guess when he touched me it zapped some of my energy."

Sam laughed, "Cas was touching you?"

Dean choked, coughing loudly, "Jesus Sam, not like that…"

Dean did the best he could to play it cool, but the heat burning up his face let him know that he was blushing.

"You sure? You guys seem really close lately…"

"Yeah, so," Dean asked, taking another aggressive bite. He refused to look at his brother.

Sam shrugged it off but Dean's heart was pounding out of his chest. He and Cas made brief eye contact before going back to their burgers.

"So… tell me about the vampire situation," Dean said, trying to change the subject.

The boys dove into business, with Sam bringing up that he was sure there were more vamps in the nest than they originally guessed.

The cheeseburger that Cas was eating was greasy and warm and helping him keep things straight in his mind. It was quite a relief to have the room stop spinning but he noticed an ache beginning between his temples.

When the pain did not subside right away Cas began to heal himself without really thinking about it. It was habit by now to keep his vessel in the best condition possible. It burned up his energy so fast, that he suddenly felt weak all over, he swayed on his feet and worried he might pass out.

"I think I'm going to lie down now," Cas said setting down his half-eaten burger and heading for the couch. Dean and Sam watched as the angel suddenly ducked out of the conversation and made a beeline for the nearby sofa.

Cas laid down quickly and propped his feet up on the arm of the couch. His eyes closed right away and he draped one of his arms across his forehead. Within seconds his breathing became slow and steady, signaling that he was already in a deep sleep. Dean stared at him while he chewed…

"So… anyway… I think we should head over in the morning, crash in on them while they're asleep."

Dean nodded, "Always a good plan."

"I think we should bring Cas with us… since there are more than we originally thought."

Dean wondered if Cas would be any good in battle with how messed up being in heat was starting to make him… but it wasn't like Dean could tell Sam that… at least… not right now. He nodded anyway.

"Well Sammy," Dean said, crumbling up the wrapping paper on his finished burger and grabbing his leather jacket.

"Let's go get us some dead man's blood."

Sam finished up his food as well and the boys headed out to the local morgue with several empty syringes.

* * *

Ah, morgues.

It didn't seem to matter how long the hunters had been in this gig, morgues always freaked Dean out. It was probably because he'd seen too many horror movies with dead bodies suddenly just sitting straight up and ripping off their white sheet to reveal a monster…

Thinking about it… it was kind of weird to Dean that he and Sam had never had that happen to them… was today the day it would? It was only a matter of time before it would… right?

Dean shivered with a cold chill.

He was on high alert, but he seriously doubted it would happen.

He and Sam stood quietly while they filled their syringes with blood from the corpses. God, their lives were so messed up.

Sam had been rather quiet and Dean wasn't sure if he was doing that _thing_ again or not…

Dean couldn't really worry with Sam right now, he was having a little bit of trouble focusing on the task at hand, it was getting close to 9 o'clock and the energy refill that Cas had worked on him seemed to be wearing off.

He was nowhere near as tired as he was then, but he could feel it creeping up on him.

Sam sneezed and Dean looked up at him. This seemed to be enough to break the tension in the room.

"So what's going on with you and Cas," Sam suddenly asked.

Dean felt caught but he kept himself focused. "What do you mean?"

"You guys seem pretty close lately… sleeping in the same bed… is something going on?"

Dean rolled his shoulders, "Cas is just going through some weird angel shit lately, but nothing is going on…"

"Angel shit that requires you both to sleep together?" Sam smiled like he was real proud of himself. He looked at him but Dean didn't meet his brother's gaze.

"Okay, I know it's happened twice now, but I swear they were both accidental."

Sam laughed while Dean's heart throbbed in his neck. He swallowed thickly, embarrassed. He hated this… Sam was being a real ass about him and Cas… So what if they were fucking? It wasn't really Sam's business… It wasn't like Sam's past fuck buddies were perfect either… He had Ruby and almost Lilith…

Even still, he couldn't tell him about him and Cas… not yet.

Besides, how long was this really going to last anyway…?

Sure he and Cas had agreed not to sleep with anyone else, but Dean wasn't sure if it was a _permanent thing_ or not…

Cas was often doted on by others around him, telling him how handsome he was; Dean was sure that it was only a matter of time before Cas found someone else and backed off of Dean and Dean was fine with that…

His chest tightened because it literally hurt at the thought of Cas deciding to move on to someone else… well, maybe he wasn't fine with that, but he could deal with it if it was what Cas wanted.

If he didn't even know how long it was going to last then Sam didn't need to know… He could handle himself and he could handle Cas…

"What kind of weird angel shit anyway?"

"He's-," Dean had to catch himself before he blurted out about Cas being in heat. "He hasn't quite told me exactly what it is… but it sounds weird… I don't really know," Dean totally lied. He hoped his brother didn't realize it.

Sam finished filling his last syringe with blood, "If something is going on, you can tell me… Weird angel shit or not."

Dean took a deep breath and let it out slowly, despite his desire to huff in frustration. Sam had the scent now and he wouldn't stop prodding until he got the answer he thought was the truth…

Dean didn't like lying to his brother and he especially hated being under constant surveillance while Sam tried to catch him in a lie…

"Alright, Sam," Dean said, smiling at his brother. "As soon as he tells me what's going on I'll let you know."

If Sam wanted to watch his every move that was fine, Dean knew how to get away with a good lie. He would just have to be more careful about him and Cas for a while and let this blow over.

Until then he pushed another syringe into the corpse lying in front of him, filling it with dead man's blood.

He could get away with this still. His cover wasn't blown quite yet.


	10. Chapter 10

Dean stared down the barrel of his own gun and into the eyes of a hissing vampire.

He was huge and sweaty with dark greasy hair that was pulled back into a ponytail. The vampire was on top of him, holding him down and trying to keep Dean from pointing his gun at his face and doing everything he could to pull it from Dean's grasp.

Dean struggled underneath the vampire's weight trying desperately to get his finger on the trigger. Guns may not have been the weapon of choice against vampires, but at least it would stun him long enough to allow Dean to get his footing back. Blowing a hole in someone's face was typically effective, vampire or not. And at this point… Dean needed all the help he could get.

To say the least, the ambush had not gone as planned.

Dean, Sam, and Cas had broken into the abandoned house where the vamps were squatting. Cas took the upstairs while Sam and Dean moved through the main level, filling the sleeping vampires with the blood they collected the night before. The plan was, once all the vamps had been sabotaged with the dead man's blood then the trio would slaughter them all. It would be an easy in and out kind of deal, the vampires wouldn't know they were there until it was too late. All they had to do was keep quiet and inject as many as possible.

Vampires were scattered all throughout the house, sleeping on different types of furniture and even the floor. There were so many that Sam ended up heading to the basement to do a quick sweep for any hiding down there.

Dean was slowly emptying a vile of dead man's blood into a sleeping vampire's neck when the sound of wings fluttered past his ears.

Knowing that the vamps could spring to life at any minute and attack had Dean on edge, and hearing those wings fluttering past his ears… the wings that had risen out from Cas's shoulder blades… the wings he had had in his very hands just the night before made the hair on his neck stand on end.

He didn't have time to think about Cas, he had to focus on the needle he was slowly retrieving, otherwise, he might mess up.

"Clear upstairs," Cas whispered. His voice was so low that Dean wondered if Cas had actually spoken or if he just imagined it.

Either way, Dean nodded and began to slowly back away from the now paralyzed vamp. He was more focused on being quiet than anything else so when his foot suddenly collided with Castiel behind him, Dean stumbled.

"Fuck," Dean burst out in shock, he twisted and tried to catch himself but panicked and over corrected causing him to land flat on his stomach releasing a loud "umphf," when his chest hit the floor. His machete hit the floor and slid out of reach.

Every vampire in the room opened its eyes, and every one that hadn't been previously sabotaged with dead man's blood jumped to their feet snarling and ready to fight.

Dean turned to grab another weapon but was tackled back down to the floor. That's about when he and the sweaty giant of a vampire started wrestling over control of his gun. He could hear Cas fighting off the other vamps in the room, killing them with a single touch, but he couldn't get out from underneath this vamp. Dean shifted, figuring he should give up on the gun and just grab a knife he had hidden in a nearby pocket instead when the vampire's eyes began to glow with a fiery yellow.

The vampire's body arched and he screamed out in agony as he was burned out through the core. The vampire collapsed as Cas shoved him to the side and fell over Dean. Dean flinched and tried to catch him, but Cas seemed to have caught himself. He was gasping for breath.

"Cas," Dean whispered, worry washed over him and he stared at Cas above him. Cas slowly lifted his head and their eyes slid into contact. His hand was resting near Dean's ear and his coat was hanging down over him.

Where Dean had been worried that Cas was weak from being in heat, he now knew he was wrong. White hot energy was pouring off the angel and surging like lightning through Dean's body.

Cas's breath fanned over Dean's face as he panted heavily; his eyes were blazing a fiery blue. His mouth hung open and his hair was a mess and Dean could feel it pulsing through his bones. It crashed into him like a tidal wave. Need… Pure fucking need.

It was primal… instinctual, like every fiber of his being yearned for Cas. He tried to keep himself calm, tried to remember where he was, what he was doing… But Cas was staring at him with eyes ablaze and the brightness of them was burning all Dean's thoughts away.

His eyes slowly flicked from Dean's eyes to his lips… His chest was on Dean's chest… he was right there… so close…

Dean stared up at the angel over him and moaned lightly. He was surprised by just how easily the sound escaped him.

Heat was burning through his veins, overwhelming his body.

Cas's mouth never moved, but he heard it clear as day, Cas speaking his name…

It boomed throughout his mind like thunder.

Dean gasped; his body was humming with pleasure that was brushing lightly over his chest… his groin. He couldn't breathe; he kept trying to but he was caught up in this whirlwind of lust and bright blue eyes…

He stared at Castiel with open mouth shock. The pleasure that buzzed through his skin was hardly there… just a whisper against his skin, but still present… and Dean wanted more.

He panted, scrambling for a thought that wasn't about Cas, trying to get his shit together, but he couldn't… his heart pounded hard making him dizzy.

When he couldn't take anymore Dean reached up, grabbing Castiel's coat collar and pulling him down, their lips colliding. Dean's tongue dove into Cas's mouth, kissing him deeply. He tasted so sweet and Cas made a sound of shock before grunting in approval and responding with his tongue against Dean's.

Dean's chest was tight with need as he raked his fingers through Cas's dark hair and pulled the angel as close as he could get him. He needed it and he needed it now. His body was burning, aching already for Cas. He needed to be inside, needed to finish with Cas vibrating around him. God, how long had it even been since they last fucked? Hours… but it felt like months.

He cupped Cas's face in his hand, his fingers up behind Cas's ear as he kissed him deeper. Cas moaned into the kiss when Dean bit playfully at his bottom lip and tugged it with his teeth.

Like an addict to his drug, in this moment, nothing else mattered.

Dean was more aroused than he thought, and he realized it when his dick pulsed behind his tight jeans. He tugged on Cas's clothes, pulling the angel's waist close until Cas suddenly got bold and moved his hips, grinding against him.

Dean threw his head back and moaned at the feeling which seemed to make Cas move faster. Dean scrambled to get his hands on Castiel's hips and got lost in the wave of Cas thrusting against his aching erection. He could feel Cas's arousal sliding against his and it was driving him crazy.

This was happening. It was happening right fucking now.

Cas's forehead was against his and they were grinding and sweating, and making small noises of pleasure to each other until Dean thought he was gonna burst. He reached forward to yank that stupid trench coat off of Cas's shoulders, exposing the black suit jacket he wore underneath and his brain was screaming, _'Now! Now! Now!_ '

Dean was ready to start unbuttoning his white dress shirt when he heard it, a loud thumping, coming closer. Cas kept moving his body against Dean's but Dean realized what it was…

It was Sam.

"Stop, stop," he said, shoving Cas hard and struggling to get away before Cas seemed to understand and backed off enough for Dean to scramble to his feet.

Sam thumped up the last few steps and barreled into the room, gun ablaze with a machete at the ready in his free hand.

Dean's body still hummed, and he kept his hips aimed away from Sam so that his brother would not see just how excited he was. He wiped fiercely at his lips, trying to get the taste of Cas off of him. Dean ached as the tingles of excitement ebbed away, and the heat that had overtaken him just a few seconds before was replaced with a sudden coldness.

Sam looked taken aback, like he knew he'd interrupted something but he wasn't sure what, he breathed heavily and lowered his weapons.

He looked to Dean, then to Cas who was sitting on the floor disheveled and breathing hard. Thankfully part of his coat laid over his lap, hiding his arousal from sight.

Sam shot Dean a questioning look before looking to all the burned out vamps lying all along the floor. Dammit, Dean hadn't managed to kill a single one of them.

Dean turned to look at his brother, embarrassed and somewhat ashamed of himself. Sam could've been in trouble down there but instead of hunting he got all caught up in Castiel… he risked Sam's life… Hell, if they had missed a single vamp he could have risked his _own_ life…

Sam moved to Dean's side.

Dean looked down at the floor… disgusted with himself.

"Are you alright?"

He wasn't really sure. What the hell had just come over him?

"Yeah," Dean responded gruffly.

He watched as Sam turned, probably to help Cas back to his feet, but when he turned Cas was already gone.

Dean rubbed his face… He wanted to get away from this place and what had just happened…

He wanted to get away from Sam too… He didn't want his brother looking at him when he felt like this.

But that wasn't an option so Dean did the only thing he knew how to do, he sucked it up and went back to work.

"Downstairs clear?" Dean asked.

Sam gave an affirmative nod.

"Cas and I… we cleared this floor… and he cleared the top floor."

The boys did one final sweep, looking for any vamps that may have been hidden or any humans that may have been held, hostage. There were still quite a few vamps who were paralyzed that Dean happily beheaded. He looked into their eyes before he did it, they knew. They probably saw the whole thing with Cas…

Once they were sure that the nest was totally clear they began moving the bodies to the backyard.

Dean groaned as he pulled himself out of the grave he and Sam had just dug. He breathed hard and wiped sweat from his brow and longed for an ice cold beer.

"Damn, sure wish killing vamps was like it is in Buffy the Vampire Slayer."

Sam laughed at his brother, his eyebrows coming together a bit in confusion. "What?"

"Well shit, all she has to do is stake them and poof, they're dust. She never had to salt and burn the remains…. Why couldn't that be one of the few things that were true about vamps?"

"Dean, that show is so lame… and old."

"Come on Sammy, Sarah Michelle Gellar is hot. Tight leather pants… stake at the ready…"

Sam shook his head and the two went to work on getting the vampire's bodies and severed heads into the ground. Sure it might be silly to salt and burn vampires but hey, the idea of hunting a ghost vamp didn't sound like fun to Dean.

While they worked Dean's mind kept going back to that moment with Cas. Him staring down at him with glowing eyes and pumping pleasure into him… through the air… it felt… _so good_ … and it was _so_ fucked up…

Dean kept trying to convince himself that everything after that point… the kiss, the grinding… It was all by his own choice… but damn, it was like he lost control of himself and his hormones took over. It was like his body demanded that he take Cas right then and there and he couldn't wait one more second…

And hell, what if Sam had come barreling up the stairs just a few seconds later? How far into it would he and Cas have been then?

Then there was Castiel's voice in his head? Speaking loud and clear just like he would speak normally… he was looking right at Cas when it happened… his mouth never moved… He never actually _spoke_ Dean's name…

He knew that Cas could hear him a lot… like, whenever Dean prayed to him for help or whatever. But he never expected to hear Cas in his own head… And was it even legit? Or was it just something he imagined?

Sam jarred Dean from his thoughts by suddenly asking him if he was okay. He, of course, told Sam he was fine…

Maybe he was making a big deal out of nothing; it was probably just typical angel mojo that caused Cas's voice in his head... And maybe he was just hit with a wave of Cas's heat…? That would explain his sudden inability to control himself… He and Cas would just have to be more careful, it was no big deal.

And with that, Dean was able to tuck his troubles away deep within and fool himself into not worrying about it anymore… at least for now.

When the boys finally finished with burning and burying the remains they slid into the Impala and headed back to their little motel. It was getting late and the motel's neon lights were already buzzing and flickering against the night sky.

"Dean, mind if I get a shower first," Sam asked as he and Dean walked through the motel door.

Dean's shoulders slumped. Oh God, he hated those words. Dean wanted to fight over it, he was the oldest and dammit he deserved to shower first! It was a birthright

"Sammy… please be quick… okay?" Dean sighed heavily.

He seriously didn't want to let his brother go first but hell, the kid had gotten him extra onions on his burger earlier… and turnovers… which he hadn't eaten yet.

Dean headed to the fast food still on the table and popped open one of the cardboard boxes containing the tasty treat. That's when Cas popped into the room. Dean looked up at Cas with a mouth full of pie.

"Sup?"

"Hello, Dean," Cas said. He seemed a little more at ease than he was earlier which of course, put Dean at ease as well. He tried not to think about the kiss they had shared earlier but his face still turned red.

"Where'd you run off to," he asked, squinting at his turnover.

"I… felt like I was going to lose control of myself…"

Dean, who had gotten lost in his turnover once again, looked up at Cas in surprise.

"Lose control?"

Dean laughed a little but in all honesty, he had felt the same way…

Cas nodded and suddenly stepped closer to Dean making Dean immediately straighten up. He looked down at Cas's crotch but he didn't let his eyes linger. He mentally kicked himself in embarrassment for looking in the first place.

_'Dammit! Get a'hold of yourself Dean. You're acting like a stupid teenager…'_

Cas squinted at Dean in a way that made Dean feel like somehow the angel was listening to his thoughts. He rolled his shoulders.

"Lose control how," Dean asked.

He licked crumbs from his bottom lip and watched as Castiel's pupils dilated.

He knew exactly how Cas might've lost control… but hell, he liked teasing the angel.

"Dean, it's getting worse… I would like to… I need to… touch you... "

Fuck.

Dean stared back into the angel's gaze, swallowing hard.

He was starting to feel it again… bubbling in his chest… that same energy from before.

It started in his heart, pumping hard and blooming outward. Dean swayed a little on his feet and looked to the floor.

Dean heard the shower turn on in the bathroom and looked over his shoulder. The door was closed, and Sam was nowhere to be seen and when he looked back, Cas was staring at him.

He was starting to feel trapped. He wanted Cas… wanted to pin him against the wall and bang him until the windows burst… but this… this was getting out of control.

If they started making out… if they started fooling around more than they already were… they would get caught and Dean was starting to feel like he couldn't control himself or his body. He felt like he needed to be inside of Cas… he felt like he needed it like he needed air in his lungs.

This wasn't right.

Dean's heart was pounding, "Cas, this is getting a little out of hand here, buddy..."

Cas squinted at his lips, he was just inches from Dean's face.

"Sam might catch us…"

Cas leaned forward a little, his mouth was the only thing Dean could see. He sucked in air.

Why do I feel like this? Dean wondered, his chest was tight… he wanted it so badly.

Fuck, fuck, fuck…

"Cas… I…"

He couldn't stay away from him. The space between them… it was killing Dean.

He moved forward, catching the angel's lips with his own making relief surge through his chest. Dean reached up with his free hand that wasn't holding his half-eaten turn-over and cupped the back of Cas's neck. He kissed slowly, their lips moving together.

He felt better, like he could finally breathe again. He sighed into the kiss, stepping closer to make things easier. He never picked up his pace, which he could tell was driving Cas nuts. But Dean didn't really want to make out like before… he just wanted to touch him… to kiss him… to feel Cas's lips with his…

For now, just kissing was enough for him.

Cas's lips were dry and soft and he tasted sweet. Dean smiled when he pulled away because Cas leaned forward and caught his mouth again. His kisses were much more aggressive, he even licked lightly against Dean's lips. But Dean kept things slow, no matter how anxious the angel was.

He heard it again, loud and clear. Castiel's voice echoing through his mind… He was speaking his name in a way that begged him to take it further.

It lit something inside of him. Just like before, need was bursting through his chest and this slow kiss was not enough anymore.

He pushed Cas away from him for a second and breathed in deeply. He needed it.

This time, it was so much stronger than before. He felt like he might burst. It was like suddenly _he_ was the one in heat. His body was on fire. He didn't know how… but it needed to happen… right now.

He turned away from Cas feeling absolutely frazzled. When he turned back Cas was watching him with wild eyes. Cas looked as hungry for it as Dean felt.

"Cas… now…"

"I know," he said. Their lips came back together and Dean was pulling at his clothes. Kissing deeply, tongues swirling together… bodies pressed close. He needed it.

He shoved Cas away.

"No, we can't…"

Cas stared up at him, breathing hard.

"Dean… I need it."

"Fuck Cas, I do too, but we can't do it here. Sammy will catch us."

Cas was looking at him with an angry glare. "Dean I…" His gaze suddenly moved from Dean to something behind him. Dean spun around.

"Dean?"

"Sammy…"

"What's going on?"

"Nothing Sam, what happened with you taking a shower?"

Sam tilted his head. "You know how it is with these crappy motels. It takes the water a while to heat up… and I needed a towel..." Sam looked at Cas who was standing awkwardly next to Dean.

"Cas, everything okay?"

Castiel huffed. "Sam, do not be alarmed… I need to borrow your brother."

Dean watched Sam's eyebrows shoot up in surprise. Cas suddenly clapped his hand down on Dean's shoulder and everything shifted.

When Dean opened his eyes, he and Cas were suddenly in a completely different place. It was still a small room except much nicer. Dean felt his face flood with embarrassment, Cas's words kept replaying in his head.

_"Sam, do not be alarmed… I need to borrow your brother."_

Oh god… How could he just zap them away like this?!

"Cas," Dean belted out. He threw his arms out in anger and spun to face the angel. "What the hell? That- that was so obvious! Sam is gonna know something is going on!"

Dean rubbed his face.

"Dean…"

Cas was breathing heavily and Dean could hear it in his voice. He shivered.

"No, slow down…"

Cas approached him quickly, stepping into Dean's personal space.

"Dean, now," He said, and he leaned up kissing Dean's mouth.

Need ripped through him, but he turned away. This feeling, this need, it wasn't normal… and Dean needed to pause and just sort this out for a second.

"Cas…"

Cas stepped into Dean's space again, following Dean when the hunter took an automatic step back. Dean lunged forward and shoved Cas hard causing the angel to stumble backward in shock.

"Sam could've really gotten hurt today! We could've gotten him killed!"

Cas's eyes looked a little crazy, blazing with anger and desperation.

"Dean!"

"God dammit," Dean said through gritted teeth. He spun on his heel and the two of them collided, dissolving into another feverish kiss.

Suddenly everything shifted, the ceiling wasn't where it should be and neither was all the pressure in his body. Instead of standing Dean was now laying flat on his back with Cas straddling him.

His trench coat was long gone and he quickly slid out of his suit jacket before tugging impatiently at his own tie. His lips were parted and his eyebrow was arched as he pressed Dean into the bed. He looked at Dean like he was prey and he was savoring the moments right before the kill.

Dean's breath hitched and evaporated from his lungs, he wondered briefly if Cas was going to be the one fucking him. He had teleported them to the bed in the room and Dean just couldn't get his mind to work… Cas yanked his tie free.

"Afterward… we talk about this," Dean said, he was suddenly popping open the buttons on Cas's dress shirt unable to stop himself. He couldn't get it open fast enough.

"Yes," was all Cas said, his eyes were ablaze as he nodded. He ran his hands over Dean's chest as the hunter unbuttoned his shirt.

Dean sat up, keeping Cas in his lap and the two began to kiss again. Dean's lips were swollen and lightly bruised from how deeply he and Cas had been kissing all day, but he didn't care. He finally managed to pull Cas's shirt off of his shoulders and started kissing at the angel's neck. His hand slid up the angel's bare back, finding one of Cas's shoulder blades and rubbing his fingertips over the skin there.

A deep moan slipped out of Cas and he clung to Dean as he shuddered. Dean continued to rub the spot, watching Cas's face turn red as he blushed. His eyes sealed shut and Dean throbbed to be inside him.

He shifted his hips a little against Cas in his lap and was zapped with pleasure from the friction against his erection.

God, he needed it so badly.

"Cas, zap our clothes off," Dean ordered and Cas nodded through his haze of pleasure.

In the next moment, they were both naked, and Dean reached forward taking Cas's erection with one hand and his with the other and began to stroke them both.

Cas's body was muscular and his skin was a slight shade darker than Dean's. It was easy to forget that the angel was so buff because he was always swallowed by that oversized coat. But remove the layers and find that he was not tiny in any way…

Dean swallowed, overwhelmed by Cas's body… his skin and the sweet smell that seemed to pour off of him lately. Cas stared down at him approvingly as he stroked the both of them.

"Cas, when we kissed in the vamp nest… I could feel your energy," Dean mumbled. Cas grunted lightly to indicate that he was listening.

"Can you… do that again?"

Cas leaned down over Dean making it impossible for Dean to keep his hand moving.

"You want me to please you, Dean," Cas asked in a whisper. Angel grace flashed behind his pupils.

Dean felt like he couldn't breathe. He slid his hands down Cas's body, encouraging the angel to slowly move his hips. He gripped at the angel's ass and spread his cheeks.

Cas's heart was racing just having Dean touch him. He felt like he could finally concentrate again.

Dean ran his fingertip down over Cas's entrance, circling and teasing the hole. Castiel shuddered.

"Will you do it," Dean asked again. His dick throbbed against Cas's.

Cas placed his hand flat on Dean's chest, focusing his energy and letting it spread throughout Dean's body.

Dean tensed beneath him, his back arching slightly. His breath hitched and he slowly started rolling his hips.

"Dean," Cas murmured, "May I touch you?"

Dean's eyes slid open in surprise. Cas was laying on top of him completely naked but he was still asking permission?

"Yes, Cas."

Cas leaned down over Dean, kissing and sucking at his neck. That mixed with the tingle of energy ghosting over his skin was starting to drive him crazy.

Castiel continued to work his way downward, kissing hotly against Dean's skin.

Dean felt lost in bliss. Castiel's grace was slowly coiling through his body, and the angel himself was kissing down his neck. He couldn't help the moan that practically burst out of him when Cas suddenly took his nipple into his mouth. He was biting and sucking on it as if he'd done it a million times before.

Dean slid a hand up the angels back and rubbed against one of his shoulder blades.

Castiel looked up at him with lustful eyes and small strings of spit still hanging from his mouth.

"Dean," the angel suddenly groaned out. "I want you inside."

Dean felt a familiar rush of arousal, God Cas could get away with saying anything…

Dean swallowed deeply, "Okay," was all he could really say. "Can you get us some lube?"

Castiel disappeared and reappeared so quickly that Dean wasn't sure if he actually left at all. Either way, he lifted his hand to reveal a small bottle of lubricant.

Dean slicked his dick with a generous amount of lube. Cas watched him unable to look away. His dick twitched repeatedly, begging to be touched.

"Dean," He whispered. "Hurry."

Dean laid back and guided Cas to lift off of him a bit. At first, the angel expected Dean to have him move off completely but when he started to, Dean stopped him.

"No. I like you on top."

Cas wasn't quite sure how that would work but he stayed put. He watched as Dean shifted, lining himself up with the angel.

His heart was pounding and his lips were quivering with desperation, he wanted Dean so badly.

When Cas met Dean's gaze the hunter nodded giving him the 'go ahead' like Cas knew what he was supposed to do.

Cas's eyes widened a little but he stayed still. Dean squeezed at his hips and pushed him towards his erection.

Then Cas understood. He took a deep breath and reached down between his legs to line Dean up until his erection was budding against his entrance.

Heat rushed through Dean in that moment, making him bite impatiently at his lips. He knew what was coming. His dick twitched making Cas huff in irritation.

"Sorry," Dean breathed, he couldn't really fight the excitement blazing through him.

Cas began to push himself down onto Dean, sucking in air as he did so. He moved slower just because he hadn't been opened up by Dean's fingers first but the lube was helping considerably.

The air rushed out of Dean's lungs as Cas slowly worked his way down onto him. He would freeze and wince but Dean stayed still, watching entranced as Cas made it down his shaft completely. His heat surrounding him… Cas's stomach muscles tight… rising and falling as he panted.

Dean throbbed within the angel and longed to start thrusting but waited, allowing Cas some time to adjust to the feeling. Cas gasped each time Dean twitched within him, then he took a deep breath and began to move.

With his hands on the angel's hips, he helped guide him to slide up before bringing him back down.

Cas was gasping and Dean's eyes were already rolling with pleasure at the overwhelming feeling of Cas riding him. He only had to show him once before Cas got the idea and was moving himself up and down, rolling his hips greedily against Dean's erection.

Dean couldn't stop the moans pouring out of him, his entire body was tight and his heart was beating a mile a minute.

His legs were taut, toes curled and he was raising his hips to meet Cas as the angel moved. Dean had never been so overwhelmed before. Cas was riding him… shifting and sliding and in full control. Then the angel shuddered, moaning loudly when he finally found that spot within… Dean helped angle himself and the pace picked up from there.

Cas was moving so fast it was hard for Dean to keep up. He was sweating, panting and trying to keep his mind focused on making this last… He kept his fists clenched into the bed's comforter as Cas moved against him. His stomach was tight, his lungs aching, heat filling his groin… He stared at Cas's thick muscular thighs as they bounced and squeezed around him.

"Fuck Cas," Dean kept repeating, feeding his moans to the angel.

Cas's had his head thrown back with his moans headed toward the ceiling. His hands were on Dean's chest and he seemed to use it as leverage to keep himself moving.

Dean wanted to see his wings… He wanted to see them stretch out across the room. Sweat drenched his brow and Dean gripped at Castiel's hips.

"Wings," he suddenly moaned out. "Show me… your wings."

Cas moaned above him and started bouncing himself faster, making Dean lose himself in the pleasure. His eyes fell closed and his head dropped back into a pillow. He was groaning and his efforts to thrust up and meet Cas were lessening as he got more and more overwhelmed with pleasure.

"Dean… I'm going to…"

Dean was throbbing so hard he didn't know if he could wait. He moved his hand from Cas's hips to his dick and squeezed around the base.

He imagined them before he saw them, those wings… and a short burst of vibration went out through Cas's body. Dean gritted his teeth and clenched his chest to keep from cumming right then.

He looked up in time to see Cas's eyes glowing, casting two bright circles at the ceiling. He released a gust of breath. It was coming, he was cumming. He clenched again trying to hold it back just long enough. Castiel begged for release above him, shoving his hips forward against the hand holding him back.

The light was getting brighter. Cas's moans getting louder and he was begging Dean to let him cum. Dean closed his eyes, holding his breath, holding himself back, then, just before it got too bright he opened his eyes.

Cas moaned his name loudly, words spilling out of him in Enochian and two dark shadows spilled across the room. They stretched and flexed in the light erupting from Cas's body. A feather fluttered down and landed on Dean's chest and he lost it, thrusting hard into Cas as he came. He began to pump Cas's erection so that the angel could cum too, vibrating and jerking with each shot.

Dean moaned as he watched the angel cumming all over his chest… He shamelessly pushed Dean's cock into himself over and over, causing more and more cum to spill out.

Then something happened… something different from the norm… Heat…

Heat spread through his body like a hot tidal wave. It was like fire erupting in his chest and spreading through his limbs. It burned with intensity… like being stuck outside on a humid day with no water in sight and it ached in his lungs. He looked at Cas, and he was all he could see… The rest of the room faded to darkness and it was just the goofy angel in sight. It burned… hotter than anything before.

Then… a wave of bliss flooded his senses… a calmness he couldn't describe. Like everything would be alright… as long as he was with Cas. Just as soon as it had started, the heat and overwhelming bliss vanished and he was back to his panting sweaty self.

"I apologize Dean," the angel spoke breathlessly, it pulled Dean back to reality with a harsh jerk.

"I made a mess…"

Cas slowly removed himself from Dean and collapsed onto the bed beside the hunter. They stared at each other panting heavily and Dean's hand was on Cas's bare back. Just like the times before, his energy was depleted.

It wasn't quite as bad as it had been the last couple of times. For whatever reason, he couldn't hold out as long with Cas in control like that… but his eyes still drooped a little with exhaustion. He smiled at Cas, his eyes seemed so blue against the white comforter… it was all he could really think about. Cas gave him a gentle smile in return.

"I feel much better now," He hummed.

Dean nodded.

It happened so fast, Dean fell asleep. Their agreement to discuss what the hell was going on between the two of them would just have to wait a little longer while Dean rested.

* * *

"Mated," an angel whispered.

" _Bonded…"_

"To a _human!"_

"To a _Winchester!"_

"I've gathered you all here today, because what you've heard is true… Castiel and Dean Winchester have mated… several times," He added, pinching the bridge of his nose. "And as a result have become Bonded…"

Hushed whispers and mutters broke out between the angels.

"As you already know," the angel in charge spoke, recalling attention to himself… "This is highly forbidden and must be stopped."


	11. Chapter 11

Sun rays spilled in from a small window just above where Dean and Cas were laying. They warmed the bare skin of Castiel's back, making the angel feel safe and sleepy. He stared dopey-eyed at Dean resting peacefully next to him. Everything felt right with the world.

It was a curiously wonderful feeling to have his vessel’s skin exposed and warmed like this. He hadn't realized how much clothing weighed him down. Now that he was naked he found that he loved the feeling. It was so relaxing and freeing…

Maybe he'd never wear clothing again. He wondered how Dean would react to that idea. 

Jut imagining how angry and red Dean would be as he explained why it was not okay for him to walk around naked all the time made Cas smile to himself.

He looked at Dean laying on his back beside him. His previous thoughts dissolving away when he caught sight of sunlight resting on Dean's lower stomach. He wondered if it felt as pleasant to Dean as it did to him to have a small concentrated area of warmth on his flesh. 

He thought about reaching over to touch it when Dean made a sound of sleep. His vast green eyes were hidden behind his eyelids and Cas wouldn't dare wake him.

No, he would wait for those green eyes to open on their own. 

Humans were such baffling creatures. Awake and so alive one moment and then, moments later, they could be asleep.

That's what had happened with Dean... He had settled into the mattress and was asleep just a few moments after their problems had been solved. 

Sleep was fascinating to Cas. Dean had explained it to him once when he was still new to his vessel. The trio had finished a hunt together and Cas had accidentally overstayed his welcome once they returned to the boys’ shared motel room.

Dean was quick to let Cas know that he “needed to get his feathery ass outta there so that he could get some shut eye.”

He would later explain that without sleep human’s couldn’t perform at their best but instead were weaker. They were almost like batteries that needed to recharge each night.

Cas wondered what that was like, requiring something like that each day, no matter what. Then again that’s what being in heat was starting to feel like... 

Like he just couldn’t get enough of Dean. Like he required his touch and would do anything for it. Sometimes he felt like his very being would erupt if he couldn’t get Dean to touch him.

It was right about then that Dean shifted and opened his eyes. 

“Shit,” he mumbled. “Don’t let me fall asleep. Sam’s probably so worried he's pacing a hole in the motel floor right now.”

Cas watched him as Dean sat up and scratched the back of his neck. Then his eyebrows slowly came together and he turned to meet Cas's gaze.

“Cas… what’s going on,” Dean suddenly asked.

The question caught him off guard. “What do you mean?”

Dean took a few breaths; looking nervously around the room for a few moments.

“I’m starting to feel crazy,” he muttered. His voice was small.

Cas stared at him, his lips parted subconsciously while he waited for Dean to continue.

Dean swallowed thickly. All Cas could do was stare at him while Dean struggled to bring himself to speak. His eyes looked fearful. 

“I’ve been hearing your voice in my mind… like you’re speaking to me. Except, I’ll be looking right at you… and…,” he trailed off before suddenly laughing.

Cas knew that it was a laugh of nervousness and not humor, but it was still startling when Dean's smile dropped back into a somber expression. 

He licked his lips, his tongue pausing in the center of his mouth while he searched the ceiling for an answer. He was looking everywhere except Cas's eyes and it was driving the angel insane. 

“I’ll be looking right at you… and your lips never move... but your voice is there... Clear as day... In my head.”

He gave another pained smile before dropping his head. Hiding himself in a way. 

Cas couldn’t think to speak. Dean was hurting. He could practically feel the hunter’s pain in his own chest...

He was hearing him in his mind? That sounded a lot like thought sharing... But that was something that only angels could do with each other… Would it even be possible to share thoughts with a human? Had Cas even _tried_ to speak to Dean through his mind? He wasn’t sure he’d tried.

When Cas didn’t speak, Dean continued. The words were spilling out of him.

“That’s not all either… I… I can’t stand being away from you…”

Lost in his thought, Cas had begun to stare off into space, but when he heard those words his eyes snapped right back into contact with Dean's. It didn't last though, because Dean quickly looked away. 

 "Dean, what do you mean?"

Dean suddenly stood up from the bed. This was all getting a little too “chick-flick” for him. Maybe he should just shut up. 

"It must just be your heat hormones affecting me somehow." 

This was how he did it... He was about to shut Cas out completely and there was no way of knowing when the subject would be brought up again. 

"Dean."

The hunter turned toward the angel looking at him. His frown was deep and his shoulders slumped. Cas stood from the bed making his way toward the man; his feet padding lightly against the hardwood floor. 

"Really," Dean said. "I'm sure it's no big deal. I think I'm just catching your heat wave."

Cas squinted at him, trying to de-code what Dean was saying. He longed to understand because tough as he might be Dean looked like he was about to break. 

“You feel similar to being in heat…?”

He hoped his guess was correct. 

Dean looked at him. There was desperation in his eyes.

“I… I put Sam in danger.” Dean swallowed, his hands squeezed into fists. “I couldn’t control myself.”

Cas moved closer, drawn into Dean… longing to ease his pain.

He had put both Sam _and_ Dean in danger… _He_ couldn’t control _himself_ around Dean… not being able to solve his problems with Dean in the vampire's nest had practically driven him to madness.

Castiel’s eyes grew in sudden realization, Dean was having the same symptoms as he was! He was “sharing his partner’s heat!”

Hearing his thoughts… Feeling uneasy when they were apart… those were all signs… of Bonding.

Were they becoming Bonded?

Was it even possible for a human and an angel? What would happen? _What would heaven do?_

“Cas?”

Dean could be in danger!

Cas suddenly felt the need to run. It was like his whole body was tightening to the point of suffocation like darkness was closing in around the corners of his vision. If he was putting Dean in danger then he needed to get away from him.

Dean grabbed Castiel’s arm just above his elbow. Just by the look on the angel’s face, he knew that Cas was about to bolt.

“Oh no, you’re not running off. What’s wrong?”

“Dean,” Cas said gruffly, his eyes wide. He still looked like he was going to fly away at any second.

“No. Don’t look at me like that. Tell me what’s wrong.”

Cas stared at him with his eyes blown wide open.

“Cas… say something.”

“We’re Bonding,” Cas muttered. “I don’t know how… but I think we’re… Bonding.”

Dean stared at Cas. “What is that supposed to mean?”

Cas turned, looking away from Dean.

“When angels go into heat they Bond with the person they choose to mate with.”

Dean closed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose. “You didn’t think to mention this?”

Cas glared harshly at Dean.

“Bonding happens between _angels._ I didn’t know I needed to worry about it.”

Dean licked nervously at his lips.

“What’s gonna happen Cas? What should we do?”

Cas swayed a little. He didn’t know the answer to that.

“There’s a lot about this that I don’t know… and with you being human it makes things even more complicated.”

Dean and Cas stared at each other for a few moments.

“I’m afraid I’ve put you in danger… If it’s even possible that we’re Bonding… It’s forbidden for angels and humans to mate…”

Dean rubbed his eyes. He was exhausted. Why had Cas come to him in the first place begging for his help if he knew it was ‘forbidden’?

“Should… we stop? Is it possible to break… a Bond?”

The question was simple and easily left Dean’s lips, but the thought of it poisoned the air. Dean saw that saying it immediately hurt Cas… His shoulders deflated a little and he looked to the floor.

Did he even want to stop?

The thrill of sneaking around… The promise to not sleep with anyone else… Even using ‘problem’ as a code word, as silly as it was… The thought of being forced to go back to what they had been before… Always wanting and never receiving… ran through Dean’s mind.

“If the Bonding process has begun, breaking it will be brutal… The pain of separation has been so bad that angels have lost their minds… or even died…”

Dean swallowed, he couldn’t even control himself about Cas thirty minutes ago… how was he supposed to try and keep away from him long enough to break their Bond?

He couldn’t afford to lose his mind over Cas either… he needed to be there for Sam…

“We would have to stay away from each other for a very long time… Even being in the same room is enough to keep the Bond alive. It could take months…”

Cas didn’t look at him as he spoke… Dean felt pain in his throat, he couldn’t swallow it away. Being away from Cas for months?

“I don’t want to do that,” Dean said. The words spilled out of his mouth all at once.

Dean’s cheeks blazed with embarrassment but Cas’s eyes seemed to light up. He finally looked up from the spot on the floor he had been staring at.

“I mean, Sam and I need you all the time… There’s no way we could separate for months...”

Cas smiled just slightly and then nodded.

“Okay, zap our clothes back on… If we’re going to have all this shit coming at us we need to be prepared… I think… we need to tell Sam.”

Cas’s eyes widened at that notion.

“We’re going to need all the help we can get researching this… We need to know everything we’re in for…”

* * *

 

Fully dressed and eased of their previous problems, Dean and Cas stood facing each other.

The secret was about to come out. Dean and Cas were going to have to come clean because Sam was too nosey and smart not to figure out that they were asking all these questions about angels and heat because they needed the information for what was going to happen to _them._

Dean looked at Cas, fixing part of his coat that had been turned inside out. “Damn…” he sighed. “I’m sure this will be nice and awkward.”

“Sam will surely be very understanding.”

Dean rolled his shoulders, his shirt felt a little bit tight. If anything Sam was always understanding… it was just the fact that it was his brother, and it was Cas, and that this had been going on _for a while._ And fucking Sam… He'd probably give a knowing smile or burst into laughter like he did when he caught the two of them in bed together… Or he’d be insanely quiet or confused or embarrassed…

And fucking Sam… He'd probably give a knowing smile or burst into laughter like he did when he caught the two of them in bed together… Or he’d be insanely quiet or confused or embarrassed…

And what if he made comments, what if he kind of… lectured them both about it when they started finding more information… If he heard a “Dean, you should’ve known better...” he might lose his shit.

And what about Bobby… oh god, he’s probably going to need to be roped in too. They were going to need a lot of manpower on this topic… and this didn’t seem like something they were going to find in an ancient text because it literally had nothing to do with humans! It’s supposed to be purely angel nonsense.

What if they were completely out of luck? Flying blind was something Dean hated the most… What if things got unbearable? What if he and Cas needed to go on some kind of sexcation because they couldn’t handle doing anything else?

What if something goes seriously wrong because Dean is a human being and Cas is literally a being of power and light crammed into a tiny vessel who used to be named Jimmy?

Dean swallowed, swaying and feeling light headed. Cas was squinting hard at him.

“Take us back,” Dean huffed, “let’s get this over with.”

Dean closed his eyes when he felt Cas touch his shoulder. The world shifted beneath his feet and he felt like he was falling for about 30 seconds before the ground seemed to reappear under his feet.

He jerked a little, feeling like he needed to catch himself and when he opened his eyes they were back at their motel.

Sam, who had been pacing around the room with his cell phone crammed against his ear, practically leapt across the room. “Dean, what the hell?! I called you like 8 times!” His eyes looked toward the phone he was still holding.

“Yeah Bobby,” he said. “He’s back with Cas… I’ll call you back.”

Sam snapped his phone shut.

“What’s going on with you two?”

Dean and Cas exchanged a glance.

“Sam… there’s something we need to tell you.”

“Finally, I could use some answers,” Sam said. He was tense, his hands in fists, his shoulders raised… It wasn’t like him to get so bent out of shape.

After a minute or so of silence, he seemed to relax a little and asked, “What’s going on?”

Dean shifted back and forth. He really didn’t want to say this out loud… He licked his lips and prepared to drop the bomb.

Sam’s eyes were searching hard, he stood up straighter… waiting for Dean to speak.

How? How was he supposed to say this? He wasn’t the best at putting things delicately.

_Was there even a way to put this delicately?_

Cas and I have been fucking… No.

Cas and I have been fooling around…?

Cas came to me with a boner and I tried to help him and it has sort of gotten out of control and now we can’t stop having sex and we’re both sort of in heat and Bonding and that’s bad because it’s an angel thing only, but here I am hearing his thoughts and unable to contain myself?

Dean rolled his shoulders and straightened his stance before meeting his brother’s gaze. “Sam… Cas and I… We…”

The sound of wings cut Dean off mid-sentence, and for a second Dean thought that Cas had bolted right before he could say it. A quick look to his right dismissed that thought because Cas was still beside him.

When he looked back to Sam he realized that the room was filled with angels, all wearing their typical business suits and ties. Dean’s body tensed up, ready to jump into defensive action. The angel's had managed to appear right in the middle of the room separating him and Cas from Sam, who was now standing with the group of angels in front of him.

Fuck… he didn’t like being separated from Sammy like this at all…

“Castiel and Dean Winchester!”

The lead angel, a woman with blonde hair, pointed to the men in question before her.

“You are under arrest for the committing of forbidden acts of sexual intercourse and Bonding between human and angel!”

“What?!” Dean heard Sam shout, he caught sight of his brother’s eyes nearly popping out of his skull.

In a sudden rush, group of angels grabbed Sam and shoved him against the wall, holding him back.

All Dean could see were Sam’s legs flailing about. He was shouting for Dean and fighting as the rest of the angels turned toward Dean and started closing in on them.

“Sammy!”

“Dean, what’s happening?!”

The angels were getting closer, grabbing him and holding him so that he couldn’t fight. He looked to his right again and caught sight of Cas getting his angel blade yanked from his grip. He tried to reach for Cas, to swing at an angel, but a hand reached up and touched his forehead.

The last thing he heard was Cas shouting his name as everything went white.


	12. Chapter 12

A dull throbbing in his skull brought Dean back to consciousness. He squeezed his eyes against the painful drumming in his head. The harsh white light was seeping through his eyelids and he could hear a faint buzz from overhead lights.  It all happened so fast…

Sam… Cas… Angels…

Dean jerked as he came to his senses. His muscles ached and his body was twisted like he’d been dumped and left in whatever angle his body landed in. His cheek was squished against the floor, leaving his face wet with his own drool. 

The hunter slowly opened his eyes. He squinted hard against the brightness of the room and lifted his head. His entire body ached like he was hungover. His head felt like it was going to split open and his limbs felt heavy.

Laying on his stomach, Dean pushed himself up a bit from the floor and rested his weight on his elbows. He wiped his chin dry and with only one eye open he looked around the room. His stomach plummeted in horror.

Bright, blinding white was all he could see. Beneath him, above him, around him. All there was… was white. Dean couldn’t tell where the walls ended or where the floor started. Even the floor beneath him only provided more horror as it appeared that he wasn’t even sitting on anything at all. 

He was trapped in an endless white void.

The air evaporated out of his lungs. Darkness started creeping in on his vision like he was about to pass out. Dean closed his eyes to keep from hyperventilating.

Tiny spaces didn’t bother him. He and Sam had to take down a monster hiding out in the vent system of a school when they were kids; their dad was obviously too big to get inside them so he coached the two of them through the whole thing. It was a rush, and it stopped Dean from ever having a problem with tight spots. This was different though. It was bright. He could see if anything were to come at him. There wasn’t something waiting for him behind a corner…  This was like being stuck in nothing.

Did he even exist anymore? How was he supposed to know?

How was he supposed to fight if there seemed to be no way out? Dean swallowed, he couldn’t open his eyes because this white void was too much.

He needed to figure out what he was up against. He slowly pushed himself up until he was standing, which was a bit strange to do with both eyes closed.

Dean slid an eye open to view the room around him again. His throat immediately began to close up. What if what he was standing on was some kind of illusion? What if he stepped too far in one direction and ended up falling through this endless void forever? What if this was some kind of room that only angels could get in and out of? Dean squeezed his eyes shut, fighting the panic. He had to remain calm.

If he was going to find either his brother or Cas he needed to try to get out of here.

Dean checked his pockets for his phone or a weapon. Everything was gone, the angels must have stripped him of everything before they dumped him in here.

He huffed in irritation and thought of Cas. Angels had randomly popped in and outed his and Cas’s whole relationship to Sam. They were yelling about how forbidden it is for them to be fooling around.

Would they kill Cas for that?

Would the punishment for such “forbidden acts” be death?

Dean found it hard to breathe. Cas and his bright blue eyes sealed in death. Those large black wings that Dean so loved to see stretched out during sex… burned into the floor. Never hearing that familiar “Hello, Dean” ever again… His vision was blacking out again. Dean had to shake himself to stop the images. His heart was racing and his throat was so tight he struggled to take in air.

                                                                                             
This room was fucking him up. He needed to see Cas, they had already been apart for too long. It wasn’t normal for him to get this emotional.

But there was a pain in his chest that he just couldn’t shake. He felt like he was too far away from his angel. There was too much space between them. He needed to touch him… just feel his skin and he would be okay.

  
Somehow… Dean knew… Cas was still alive. He could feel him. He also knew that Cas was in danger.

He had to find him. Once they were together he’d be able to think straight. They could find Sam and get out of here.

After calming down a bit Dean was ready to step forward and try to find a way out. He feared that he might be about to step off of some unseen ledge and fall but he ignored it and started moving forward with his arms outstretched like a blind man without his cane.

He moved forward slowly and wondered briefly if he would walk forward forever and never find anything. So when the tips of his fingers bumped into a wall he jumped and his eyes snapped open. Just like the floor, he couldn’t see the wall in front of him. It was just an invisible barrier. It look no different standing here than it did when he was in the center of the room, but at least he could _fee_ l something.

He spun around, pressing his back against the wall before slowly sliding back down to the floor. He needed the floor… as ridiculous as that sounded. He needed it to remind him that he wasn’t falling. 

He felt like he was losing his mind. He was struggling to keep it together. Fear was eating up his mind because the threat wasn’t snarling in front of him. He couldn’t grab it…  He couldn’t beat it to a pulp.

 _‘Breathe Dean,’_ Dean reminded himself. _‘There is a way to beat this. There’s a wall. That means this is either a room or… maybe some huge hallway.’_

He exhaled loudly and would swear that underneath all the fear buzzing in his own mind he could hear Cas… just faintly calling out to him.

How long had they been separated? The pain in his chest was getting worse. Searing up his spine. He remembered Cas with his somber expression, explaining to Dean that the pain has been so bad that angels have lost their minds… or even died…

Maybe Dean _was_ losing his mind. He couldn’t even open his eyes in this horrible room…

Another wave of pain suddenly shot through Dean’s body. Growing with intensity until it felt like his flesh was being ripped apart. He bared his teeth, squeezing his eyes shut and his hands into fists. His body trembled in pain.

Their bond was breaking. Somehow he just knew, the Bond was breaking.

The pain was so real, yet just a phantom on his skin. It burned, but he couldn’t reach out and touch it. He was defenseless to stop the sensation of their bond ripping apart.

The pain was shredding his soul.

Tears leaked from Dean’s eyes but it kicked him into action. Get to Cas, his brain was screaming. Get to Cas! He staggered to his feet, leaning heavily against the wall. He panted through dry lips.  He had to get out.

If this was a room… every room had to have a door. Dean wiped sweat from his face and began to make his way along the wall.

He gripped his chest against the waves of pain. He was sure he could hear Cas yelling out to him in his mind and he could feel pain in his body that wasn’t his. They must be hurting Cas… 

He had to find a way out of here. Find a bump, a seam, anything…

He grunted loudly, still sliding along when his shoulder suddenly collided with the corner of two meeting walls.

Wall! He found another wall! This wasn’t some endless hallway. It was a room.

Dean quickly pivoted and started along the next wall moving much faster. His heart was pounding and he was afraid that another wave of pain was going to roll through him at any second.

They couldn’t keep them apart until the bond split; he wouldn’t let them. It could take weeks… He had to get back to Earth, back to his brother.

Back into Castiel’s embrace.

His heart was ripping apart being away from him.

 _‘Dean…,’_ His mind whispered. It was Cas… He could hear him.

_‘I’m coming buddy, just hold on.’_

Dean’s fingers slid over a bump and the hunter gasped out in shock. He spun around staring hard at the invisible barrier before him.

He couldn’t see anything but he knew he felt it! He squinted, leaning slowly from side to side as he ran his finger back and forth over that bump.

His eyes jumped around in his skull trying to locate the source of the bump. Trying to see what was causing it. He followed it up until he couldn’t stretch any further and down until he touched the floor.

He reached out with his other hand and ran it until… Yes! He felt another seam! Was this… the door?

As he stared at the white before him a thin black line seemed to materialize out of nowhere.

“Yeah,” Dean shouted in joy.

He couldn’t look away. It was so white in here that if he lost sight of it, he might not ever find it again.  Dean ran his hands around like crazy trying to find any kind of doorknob. Who knows, maybe it would be that easy.

When his fingers found nothing he stepped back, calculating. If it was a door it would either swing in or swing out… If he couldn’t find a doorknob he would just need to break down the door. Dean placed his hands on the wall in front of him and began to push as hard as he could. Grunting, shoving and even throwing himself at this spot of the wall. Sweat was running down his neck and he could feel the door moving but it would not open.

Dean stepped back and rolled his shoulders. If he couldn’t push it open then somehow he had to pull it. He moved forward to get his fingers in the crack of the door when suddenly his chest exploded in pain. It knocked him to the floor and his vision cut out. He was gasping with eyes wide open but couldn’t see a thing.

Something shifted and suddenly the room he was seeing was different than the white room he was trapped in. This room was gray… bleak… and his eyesight was blurry. A figure was standing before him with an angel blade in their hand. A female with blond hair…

The sound of Cas crying out in pain flooded Dean’s ears. His stomach lurched and he felt that ripping sensation through his body again. He could hear Cas screaming, but he couldn’t see him anywhere.

“Cas!” he was screaming as hard as he could, but he couldn’t even hear his own voice. All he could hear was Castiel screaming out in pain.

She was torturing him, which he didn’t understand. She was standing in front of _Dean_ , she was slicing _him_ with the angel blade, but it was Cas he was hearing.

There was so much pain in his body that Dean didn’t have time to question how he got to this strange room or how he was seeing the blond in the first place.

Then suddenly the angel in front of him called him Castiel… called him brother.

Dean’s body went cold when he realized that he wasn’t seeing through his own eyes anymore… but Cas’s…

“Cas,” Dean called out, this time with his mind. He tried to hide the terror in his voice. He barely heard a reply, just a grunt from the angel.

“Cas, are you okay?! Where are you?!”

Cas never answered, instead he slowly lifted his head until their vision raised and looked toward the door of the room. It took Dean a moment to see it because of the blond that was yelling and moving in and out of their line of sight with an angel blade in their face. There was a second angel in the room too, just watching. Then he saw it. A small plaque that read Cell D – Prison Ward.

Just as soon as he saw it, Cas’s gaze dropped back to his lap.

The blond was suddenly dragging the angel blade along Cas’s collar bone making both men cry out in agony. A white line appeared trailing behind the metal showing Castiel’s grace spilling out of his vessel. Dean was screaming, No! No! Stop doing this to him!

There was a loud snap and everything went black as the connection broke.

Who knows how much time passed before Dean awoke on the floor. His body trembling hard like he was freezing cold and he couldn’t get warm. His body was completely numb aside from the sweat he was covered in. He searched his mind for Cas but couldn’t hear him.

Had their Bond broken?

Dean’s heart started pounding so fast that he couldn’t move. He could only feel the pain of his heart working so hard. He was curled up in the fetal position panicking and trembling like a child.

He couldn’t feel Cas, he couldn’t feel Cas, HE COULDN’T FEEL CAS!

He didn’t even know when he truly started to feel that connection with the angel but now he couldn’t anymore and he couldn’t stop shaking. He couldn’t move! He just kept calling out to the angel in his mind. He needed to feel _something._

He forced movement. Shoving himself up from the floor. He had to get to Cas. He felt like he was shattered glass that had been poorly glued together and about to fall apart.

He wobbled to the door and put his fingers on the seam again, trying to get it open, trying to fight back the sob that was trying to burst out of him. He couldn’t be dead. Cas was not dead…

He was baring his teeth and pulling against the door as hard as he could but it would not budge. He switched sides, tugging harder. He could see a stream of light that was not the same as the brightness in this white void. It was blueish, and he was so close.

His brain was screaming about Cas, his fingers ached and strained white as he pulled. He grimaced, his eyes crinkling as he pulled as hard as he could. Then, a shift. A click. He side-stepped, pulling harder and the door gave way. Swinging open.

Dean spilled out into the hallway, rushing out so fast that he collided with the wall on the opposite end with a loud ‘ _oof!_ ’

He was gasping as he watched the door to the white room slowly slide back shut.

Dean had never been so happy to see a difference between walls and the ceiling before in his life. It was still bright, with lots of white, but this felt more like a hospital hallway than an endless void.

His shaky legs started carrying him in a direction that just kind of felt right. He was grasping at straws not hearing anything from Cas after that intense moment of connection or whatever the hell they just had.

Dean stumbled out into a clearing that connected three different hallways. He didn’t know which way to go. He didn’t even know where he was… He caught sight of a group of angel’s headed his way and quickly darted back the way he came until they passed. They didn’t seem to notice him… word must not have gotten around that he was out of his holding cell yet.

* * *

 

A sign caught his attention. Holding Ward G. If he was in Holding then where was the Prison Ward?

Dean was getting closer. Following instincts and the strangely hospital-like signs through Heaven, he had finally made it to the Prison Ward.

He couldn’t quite wrap his brain around the fact that he was running around in Heaven. There were no clouds, no “pearly gates” or “golden streets.” No God-like figures walking around glowing with light and smiling. No robes, no halos, no wings, no harps… It was nothing like Dean had thought and he didn’t like that.

He also didn’t like the way he felt. He felt like he was drunk, stumbling about and breathing heavily. Finding Cas was all he could think about.

He was so close he could almost feel Cas in the air around him.  He hadn’t heard or felt Cas since their connection had suddenly stopped. His chest was aching, fingers tingling, he needed to see Cas… he needed him right now.

He couldn’t think about anything else.

He’d been stumbling through Ward C for what felt like ages. Somehow he kept looping around to Wards A or B…

This was like a bad dream. Being so close but never able to reach the end goal.  When he came to a hallway he was sure he’d gone down before he tried going the other way. His feet ached from walking.

Then, finally, he saw it. A sign hanging from the ceiling. Ward D.

Cas was here. He was close!

Dean licked his lips and pushed himself forward. He squeezed his fingers into fists while he sped down several hallways, avoiding angels the best he could. He came to a hard stop when he caught a group of angels in front of a door.

“He’s still passed out,” one reported. Dean’s heart rate started picking up right away.

“Well wake him up! Make him pay for these forbidden acts.” The angel who was speaking looked utterly disgusted. “Mating with a human… a Winchester! How vile. Castiel needs to pay! He has betrayed Heaven!”

The angel who he was yelling at looked uncomfortable but the one beside them was nodding in agreement. It was the blond from his shared vision before.

“What is to become of him… after the torture,” the one beside the female asked.  He was another, smaller male that Dean had seen in the room during the vision.

The angel who seemed to be in charge thought for a moment. “A cell… beside Gadreel.”

The angel’s gasped.

“Now go,” the one in charge snapped. The angels turned and headed back into the room. That must have been where Cas was being held. Dean hands formed into fists but he quickly realized that he had to come up with a new plan. The angel who had directed the others was headed right for him.

He needed a weapon, he couldn’t just storm in on Cas’s torture session without a way to protect himself. Dean flattened himself against the wall and held his breath while the angel made his way toward him. The angel walked passed before coming to a sudden stop like he realized he might have just walked past something. As he turned his head Dean jumped on his back with an iron-like grip around the angel’s neck.

The angel flailed, completely caught off guard as he tried to fight. Dean held him and kept him off balance until his angel blade finally came into sight. He was a lot stronger than this angel so he was able to yank him backward into an arch; then he reached forward and plucked the angel blade right from his hands.

He let go of the angel so he could get his footing and stab the winged asshole right in the heart but the angel was fast and body slammed Dean into the wall behind him. Dean made a loud sound of pain upon impact and slid down the wall a bit.

“Winchester,” the angel spat when he finally got a good look at his attacker.

Dean lunged forward to stab the angel again but he was left stumbling forward in an off-balance wave of panic when the impact of the angel never happened. The angel had flown away.

“Fuck,” Dean cursed. Now all of Heaven would know he was here in a matter of minutes. But the good news was that he still had the asshole’s angel blade.

Figuring he didn’t have much time he raced back to where he knew Cas was being held and hoped that Cas would know how to get out of here.

He made it to the doorway and burst inside. The female angel was leaning over Cas.

 _God, Cas…_ He could see his shoulder and his body and already he was aching to touch him.

There was an angel near the doorway who immediately started yelling and Dean lunged forward and buried the angel blade into the blonde. She screamed and erupted with white light before crumbling to the floor. The second angel jumped on Dean’s back similarly to how Dean had jumped the asshole angel just moments ago. Dean raised his elbow and slammed it into the angel hanging from his neck.

A sound of pain burst from the angel’s mouth and Dean turned around and shoved the knife into his chest. The angel looked him right in the eyes as white light began to glow through him, spilling out his open mouth. He crumpled to the floor in a heap.

Heart pounding, Dean turned and rushed over to Castiel. He looked awful, his clothes were destroyed and covered in blood. He was covered in long cuts that Dean imagined were from them dragging the angel blade against his skin.

He swallowed thickly and reached forward to grip his face and search him for signs of life.

There was a rush of bliss that flooded Dean’s senses just from touching him and it mixed with the adrenaline rushing through his veins making Dean feel high.

“Cas! Cas,” Dean was saying over and over. Cas’s cheeks were rough with stubble against Dean’s fingers and he was so happy to be touching him. His joy was quickly being replaced with worry because alarms started sounding from the ceiling and Cas wasn’t waking up.

Perhaps his only way of escape was to try to heave Cas up and carry him out? Dean leaned over Cas’s shoulders ready to lift, then noticed a single pair of cuffs around his wrists. There was a sigil Dean had never seen before carved into the metal.

Sirens were screaming and Dean’s heart was throbbing but the hunter in him knew this might be a vital piece of information. This sigil could benefit him and Sam on future hunts. He committed it to memory, tracing the lines carved into the cuffs several times as he worked with a loose screw laying on a table to undo the cuffs.

As soon as the cuffs left his skin Cas grunted and lifted his head a bit.

“Dean,” Cas called out in a gruff voice.

Dean practically flew around the chair to look Cas in the eye.

“Hey, buddy,” Dean smiled. They shared a moment, looking into each other’s eyes. Overwhelmed that the other was alive and okay.

It wasn’t long before Cas squinted at the ceiling, confused about the sirens.

The bliss of being reunited was cut short. Dean looked Cas deep in the eyes, pulling the angel to get him to stand.

“We need to get out of here.”


	13. Chapter 13

Dean’s lungs were on fire. He and Cas had been running through Heaven for what felt like ages. His legs and abdomen felt tight, and he was sweating like crazy **.** Big drops were rolling down his chin and cheeks.

Cas had an iron-like grip on Dean’s hand as he pulled him through the endless white hallways. He was trying to keep up, really, he was. But it was difficult. Not to mention that it didn’t make sense to Dean how anyone could possibly know their way around this place. Everything looked the same. Endless hallways and doors, the same square lights over and over above their heads. Everything was white… bleak… And then Cas would suddenly yank Dean around a sharp turn. Dean pushed himself forward, forcing his legs to carry him.

When Dean had been sneaking around trying to find Cas, it had been quiet… Now? Well, now a siren screeched loudly in their ears. It was as if it was booming over some kind of sound system and bellowed out all over Heaven.

“Cas,” Dean called out, gasping air into his aching lungs. “How much further?”

Dean shot a quick look over his shoulder. There was a large band of angels chasing them through Heaven. They were screaming and shaking their fists. All they were missing were pitchforks… but it  _was_  Heaven after all.

Dean pressed forward. He may have been a hunter but he and Sam didn’t usually have to run long distances like this. Usually, when he hauled ass it was a short burst of running that was enough to let them get an edge to fight or to turn back and shoot. He felt like his legs were going to collapse.

The most frustrating thing was that Cas didn’t even look like he was struggling. He was breathing faster, sure, but nothing like Dean. He was like some kind of professional athlete. He looked like a movie star who could run for miles and not be out of breath or covered in sweat.

“We are close Dean,” Cas suddenly said. Dean felt a small bit of relief hearing that.

Each time they passed a hallway several more angels seemed to join the mob chasing them. Their shouting was getting louder and they were appearing in front of them more often too; Cas was able to get past them most of the time. There was lots of ducking, shoving, and fighting their way past groups of angels.

“Cas, why don’t you just fly us,” Dean shouted, he ducked under a punch from an angel that tried to get him from a doorway they passed.

Angels were such assholes.

“It will be easier for them to catch us if I am airborne… I was hoping that by running we could get a head start,” Cas gave Dean a quick look.

“Currently there is no gateway open between Heaven and Earth,” Cas said abruptly.

Dean wasn’t quite sure what that meant. He knew it must be somewhat important for Cas to bring it up. He just stared at Cas slightly ahead of him. Thankfully the angel kept talking.

“That means that we will have to jump.”

Jump. Okay, they were going to jump.

Wait…

JUMP?!

“Jump,” Dean gasped, open-mouthed, “Jump from what,” Dean shouted.

They were running past lots of doors now. Each one had a number on it and as they ran through the halls the numbers increased. Dean watched as door number 26 slid past him.

“We’ll have to jump down to Earth,” Cas said. Dean felt himself gasp a bit more.

“I’ll fly us the rest of the way.”

Oh, he had a very bad feeling about this. Dean licked the sweat from his lips.

Cas’s hand squeezed against his. “There is no need to fret, I won’t let anything happen.”

Dean’s eyes met Castiel’s and even though they were running down a hallway dodging angels along the way, Dean could see the sincerity in Cas’s eyes. That didn’t stop the fear pumping through his veins with his racing heart though.

“We’re close,” Cas suddenly said. The doors were nearing the 40’s now. “Don’t let go of me.”

Dean nodded. There was no way he would let go, and with Cas’s steel grip, he wasn’t even sure if he could.

Cas suddenly stopped at door number 42. It was so unexpected that Dean was yanked back when he didn’t stop running fast enough. It hurt his arm so much he worried it might have popped from the socket. Cas was struggling with the door handle and Dean was left staring at the approaching mob of angels.

“Uh Cas, no offense buddy, but you should probably hurry up.”

The door swung open and Cas jerked Dean into the room with him. He slammed and locked the door behind him. There was a brief moment of them catching their breath, but it was not nearly long enough for Dean to regain feeling in his feet.

When he lifted his eyes Dean became frozen with fear. Unlike the white room that the angels had locked Dean in before, this room was completely different.  The floor stretched out before them and then completely cut off. No railings or anything to stop a fall. Just this ledge and Earth waiting to meet you far, far below.

It looked like the typical picture of Earth you would find in a science book. It was unreal.

Dean wasn’t sure if not being able to tell if he would fall through the void of the room he was trapped in before was worse than seeing an undeniable edge in front of him or not.

Cas was suddenly beside Dean with his hands on Dean’s arms. He was tugging Dean toward the edge. Dean was gasping for air as if he was still running but his throat felt like it was closing up.

“Come on, Dean,” Cas said, he was standing in front of Dean looking between the hunter, the door that the angels were now banging against, and the jump. The door separating them was shaking violently against its frame.

It wasn’t normal for Dean to be frozen in fear, but he was. He couldn’t move. He could feel Cas pulling on him but it was like his feet were glued to the floor. His eyes were fixed on the ledge, he didn’t blink, didn’t even breathe.

“Cas...”

He hated flying, he couldn’t help it.

Cas was staring into Dean’s eyes, but Dean never met his gaze. Castiel was completely stunned, he had never quite seen Dean like this before. He was paralyzed. He leaned closer to him, trying to get Dean to meet his eyes.  No matter how close he leaned Dean’s gaze stayed locked on the ledge. Cas tried shaking him lightly.

“Dean,” Cas said with authority, this time Dean looked into his eyes. When his eyes met Castiel’s deep blues it zapped Dean all the way to his toes. Cas’s eyes were so intense, so overwhelming that Dean could almost feel the intensity vibrating between them. 

Cas watched Dean’s throat bob as he swallowed thickly. His eyes seemed to lighten a bit as looked at Castiel, like some of the fear within him had ebbed away. It was like he suddenly understood that this was the only way. His lips parted and he slowly nodded.

Cas grabbed Dean’s hand and the two of them moved forward quickly and stood along the edge. There was a hard breeze blowing, and Dean swayed on his feet. He looked to Cas, and they nodded one last time at each other before crouching and leaping over the edge.

* * *

 

At first, they were free falling, chest facing the ground with their knees and arms bent back as they fell toward the earth. They looked like typical Skydivers, minus any protective gear.

Dean gripped Castiel’s hand as tightly as he possibly could. He had to keep his eyes closed to keep from freaking out. It was hard to breathe with air forcefully rushing up his nose. It was like sticking your face out a car window when you’re a kid and forgetting how to breathe because the air against your face is suddenly so intense.

After a few seconds of free falling, Cas pulled Dean into him until he was hugging him. Cas was able to control more that way. He was facing Dean, and Dean clung to him. They were chest to chest, and Dean was so overwhelmed that he may or may not have buried his face in the angel’s neck. Cas’s scent filled his nose and the scruff of his face lightly rubbed against Dean’s. It helped him block out what was happening… It made Dean feel safe.

He didn’t like flying and he certainly didn’t like falling either.

While clinging to Cas, Dean imagined that Castiel’s giant wings were spread out behind him as they soared down towards the earth, but in actuality, Cas’s wings were bent back at a hard angle and he was tilting his head toward the ground so they would be more aerodynamic. They were picking up speed and Cas was just about to spread his wings to get them down to the Earth faster when something caught his wing.

Dean and Cas were jerked back hard and immediately went off balance. Cas let out a loud yell of pain causing Dean’s eyes to pop open. His arms tightened around Dean as he looked back over his shoulder to find one of his brothers gripping a hand full of his feathers. His angel blade was out and he was about to cut into Castiel’s wings.

“Dean, I have to let you go,” Cas yelled over the roaring wind. Dean felt all the blood leave his face. He tightened his grip around Cas.

“No!”

“Dean, I’m sorry, he has- ah! I have to fight him off!”

Dean’s eyes were giant saucers of green, he did not like this plan. “Cas!!”

“I’ll come right back,” Cas said and then he let go and forced Dean off of him.

It seemed to happen in slow motion for Dean. He watched Cas push him off as he turned back toward the angel behind him to fight. He saw them throwing punches at each other as they shrunk away.

He was falling.

His leather jacket, jeans, and even his boots were plastered to his back and the back of his legs. The flaps of his jacket that hung in front of him were flapping around like crazy. The leather made loud snaps as it whipped through the air. Dean caught a glance of his boots; one of the shoe laces was wiggling wildly as it had come untied.

Dean was swinging his arms and panicking. He looked over his shoulder and saw the Earth. Squares of various shades of green patches of land, the roofs of houses… he was racing right toward them with no parachute. The sound of the wind was so loud against his ears that he could barely hear himself screaming.

Out of nowhere, an angel grabbed him, it wasn’t Cas at all. It was the same asshole from before, the one that Dean had tried to get the jump on back in Heaven. His hand was around Dean’s throat, squeezing hard. Dean shoved against him as forcibly as he could until he got his arm back far enough to punch him in the face. They were spinning wildly, and Dean was not good at fighting while falling through the air.

He thought he might’ve felt the bone of his hand fracturing. It stung like hell, but he was used to it. He kneed the angel hard in the stomach causing a loud sound of pain to erupt from the asshole’s mouth. He saw the angel blade before it happened… But he wasn’t in his element.

Pain screamed through his body when it sliced through his side. Dean’s eyes grew wide. The angel was stabbing him. As he looked at the angel who had cut him, he saw a wide grin spread across his face.

Dean’s eyes were locked with the angel that had stabbed him. His sneer didn’t last long because Cas was back and punched him hard in the face. It knocked the air out of him and with a hard shove he was able to push his brother off of Dean.

Dean watched as his body flew upward, they were falling faster than him so it almost looked like he got sucked back up into the sky. He heard Cas speaking to him, and he looked into his familiar blue eyes. Dean could still see angels over Castiel’s shoulder. They were aiming at something Dean could not see… Castiel’s wings.

Dean could only watch as the asshole angel passionately sliced through the air above him. He heard Cas screaming bloody murder and knew that they had cut through his wing. He couldn’t speak, his hands were warm and wet with the blood that leaked from his side. He wasn’t sure if they would live through this.

“Hold on Dean, just hold on.”

Their hurdle toward the Earth became more erratic and out of control. They were spinning and Cas was screaming. Things were getting dark so fast. He couldn’t fight it off. He was blacking out. His blood was getting on Castiel’s coat… that wasn’t good. He looked up into Castiel’s eyes. He looked so worried that it made Dean feel confused. He was speaking to him again as they raced toward the ground. Dean tried to hear him over the roaring wind… then… He blacked out.


	14. Chapter 14

“Dean?”

He kept hearing the name repeated.

Dean, Dean, Dean…

It made him worry, was Dean alright; was he safe? When was the last time he even saw Dean?

He didn’t know…

He felt like he was drifting into consciousness, swirling downward toward his body.

Little thoughts popped into his head here and there as Cas regained feeling in random places. It was almost like floating along a stream on his back.

The peace did not last because the next thing to greet Castiel was pain. Crippling pain that shredded through his back and his wings.

His brow scrunched and his eyes fluttered open. His vision was blurry and even the light hitting his pupils was painful. It made his head ache as he squinted his eyes. He was laying on his back, on his aching wings. Bits of what had happened started flowing back into the angel’s mind.

Suddenly he felt his arms again, his chest… When had he stopped feeling them?

When had his eyes closed at all?

They had fallen toward Earth, him and Dean… Then he was grabbed by his own brother, and he shredded through his wing. And Dean… Dean was bleeding…

They had crashed into the Earth, and with the little bit of wing power, he had left he grabbed Dean and flew them to Sam. That’s when his eyes closed, and he faded out.

Cas was in agony; it was so overwhelming in his left wing that he had to force himself to roll off of it to ease the unbearable pressure.

Movement made his vessel’s stomach turn in what Cas had come to know as nausea. He closed his eyes again hoping to make the feeling subside.

His movement also alerted Sam.

He stopped saying Dean’s name and started saying his instead. Cas met his gaze, his eyes were big and worried and his hair hung around his face. Cas stared at Sam’s plaid shirt collar until it made sense to him what it was.

“Sam,” he spoke. Even hearing it himself, his voice sounded terrible. Gravelly and choked. He wouldn’t mind getting a drink of water to ease his vessel’s aching throat.

“Hey,” Sam said quietly, “I am so glad you’re awake. What is going on? Why did angels show up and kidnap you and Dean?”

Cas watched his mouth move but didn’t really process what Sam was saying.

“Is this room angel-proofed,” Cas asked instead.

It was clear that Sam was caught off guard by this question because his face was blank for a moment before he let out a long breath.

“Since you guys had been kidnapped by them I went ahead and proofed it. It doesn’t stop them from coming in,” He said nodding at Cas, “but it’s enough to keep us hidden.”

“We need to get out of here,” Cas said with a sudden urgency, “Hidden or not they will likely revisit the same place to find us again.” Cas struggled to sit up. Sam placed a hand on Cas’s back and helped him into a sitting position.

Then his hand slid up his back and hit his wing.

Cas burst out in pain, his face crinkling and his eyes screwing shut. When he tried to open his eyes his vision cut out and he swayed, tears even came to his vessel’s eyes. Sam jumped instantly letting go

“What happened,” Sam shouted. His eyes were wide as he searched Castiel’s back to see what it was that caused the sudden outburst.

“My wings,” Cas gasped out. “They’ve been damaged…”

Cas breathed out and was able to look Sam in the eye again.

“We need to get out of here. I cannot fly us… Getting Dean and I here… It took all I had.”

There was a sadness in Castiel’s eyes as he looked up at Sam, but instead of jumping into action, Sam returned Cas’s look with a troubled look on his face.

“We can’t leave quite yet… I can’t get Dean to wake up.”

Those words slapped Castiel in the face. “He was stabbed,” Cas blurted out. His eyes seemed glazed in fear for a moment. 

“I was able to figure that much out,” Sam said. “I’ve stitched him up and everything.  I’m afraid it might be too deep. He lost a lot of blood…”

Cas instantly found the spot on his trench coat that had a circle of Dean’s blood stained into it and experienced the same nausea as before. He forced himself to move towards Dean.

He was laying flat on his back, eyes closed and his stomach just barely rising with his breath. He looked a bit pale in the face and his nice green shirt was stained in blood. Cas’s whole body tensed up in fright, how could he let this happen?

Immediately the angel placed his hands on Dean’s chest and tried to heal him.

He felt the heat of his power leave his hands but it wasn’t much. It drained him completely, he could barely hold himself up. Sam was right beside him holding Cas steady.

“Whoa Cas, don’t overdo it.”

Cas leaned into Sam heavily, his head was on his shoulder. His mouth was a worried frown.

As Cas stared up at Sam he realized that he was a beautiful human, his soft hazel eyes, his round chin…  even his soul, tainted… but still so pure. Cas loved Sam, he was like a brother, a guardian in a strange way… It confused him for a moment just how different his love of Dean was from his love of Sam.

It was difficult to keep his eyes open, he could hear Sam talking to him but he couldn’t understand the words. He just heard the deep tones of Sam’s voice.

“Sam,” Cas finally choked out. He wasn’t even aware that he had cut him off mid-sentence.  “You need to get Dean and I out of here… my brethren… they will find us if you don’t.”

Then the black swallowed him up again.

* * *

 

Sam watched Cas slip out of consciousness in his arms. He tried shaking him and saying his name but he was gone. Sam felt shaken to his core. His brother and Castiel were now both unconscious and neither were showing signs of waking anytime soon.

One minute Cas was zapping Dean away saying that he “needed to borrow his brother,” then they finally return and a hoard of angels show up and knock him out. He woke up the next day on the floor with both Dean and Cas gone and neither answering any call he made.

While he was looking at Cas in his arms the words the angel’s had shouted seemed to float back to him.

Mating with a human…

What did that mean?

He and Dean had fooled around? Cas and Dean had sex?

Was this what they had been sneaking around about? Was this why they’d been getting progressively weirder around each other? Was this the “weird angel shit” Dean had talked about?

Sam wasn’t upset, honestly, it made sense…  Him and Cas. They’d been pining for each other for so long… and what his brother did… well, that was his business.

What did make him angry was the fact that Dean didn’t tell him. Now all of a Heaven was at their throats and they were both passed out looking like they could die any second.

He wasn’t quite sure what they were dealing with. The only thing he knew was that the angels were pissed and they had to get out of here. Sam gently laid Cas down on the floor and stood up.

He was going to need help with this, big time. If it was so forbidden for Dean and Cas to have a relationship… well, there had to be a big reason for it.

He was going to need Bobby.

Since Cas had insisted that Sam get them out of there he decided that Bobby’s house was going to have to do for now. He ran out to the Impala and pulled up a piece of loose fabric of the floor in the back. A small hard surface came into view that held a couple of other small sigils that had been written there over time.

Sam took a sharpie and added the cloaking sigil to keep them hidden from angels. It was still fresh in his mind since when he wasn’t freaking out about Cas and Dean being kidnapped by angel’s he was able to do a bit of research.  He’d stumbled upon the sigil and memorized it for good measure.

Once the cloaking sigil was added Sam started the hardest part - lifting and hauling both Dean and Cas into the Impala.

Dean got the back seat so he could lay down while he healed. Sam had to be extra careful not to rip the stitches he had just given Dean. It was a terrible thought, but carrying dead weight was easy for Sam because of all the bodies they had to bury over the years of hunting.

Cas was slightly easier than Dean, but not by much. Both men were massive and he wished he had his brother helping him instead of going it alone. He got Cas into the passenger side and even buckled him in.

They were still in Iowa, they never got to leave after ganking that nest of vampires. It was actually a good thing though because they were close to Bobby **.**

Sam quickly grabbed everything else and shoved the keys into the Impala. She had a full tank of gas and Sam wasted no time in hitting the road.

It took about a day to get there. Neither Cas or Dean woke during the ride but Dean seemed to be coming around a little bit. He would make sounds or Sam would catch his fingers twitching while he filled the Impala at a gas station and stared down at his resting brother through the window. He checked on Dean every couple of minutes to make sure he was still breathing.

Finally he was able to pull into that familiar gravel lot, filled with old rusting cars and scrap metal. It was early in the morning, just a bit before the sun had started to rise but Bobby’s head still peeked out the door as Sam pulled up. He was dressed in night clothes and a robe. When he recognized the car he came barreling down the stairs.

His eyes widened when Sam stepped out of the car instead of Dean.

“This can’t be good,” he muttered under his breath.

Sam smiled sheepishly at Bobby, “Hey Bobby,” he said in an exasperated sigh before he nodded to Dean and Cas passed out in the car.

“Well this ain’t right, something must be up if you’re driving that hunk of junk,” Bobby mused. “How much trouble have these two yahoos gotten themselves into this time?”

“I’ll explain everything to you, but before we move them inside we need to add an angel cloaking sigil to your house.”

“Oh boy… here we go,” Bobby said following Sam up the stairs into his house.

Just another day on the job.

“No shit,” Bobby said, his eyes blown wide in shock.

It was about three o’clock in the afternoon. They were able to angel-proof the house and get the guys inside. Since they had gotten there so early Sam was able to catch a few hours of sleep while Bobby monitored Dean and Cas.

Now Bobby was leaned over Dean and was cleaning up his wound with a first aid kit. He sanitized and wrapped the cut before turning to face Sam.

“Yeah,” Sam said. He tipped his head back and took a long drink of his beer.

He had just brought Bobby up to speed.

“I knew these two liked to be in each other’s bubble… but I never would’ve pegged them as… well, a couple I guess.”

Sam had had a couple of beers… well four actually, and he was working on number five. After all of the stress he needed a break and being drunk was sounding better and better as he drank. He was leaned back in his chair feeling good. Then in a sudden seriousness, Sam spoke, “I just wish he would’ve told me. I’ve been scared shitless ever since they got back from Heaven. They’re in bad shape…”

“Now, now, we’ve gotten Dean back from worse, don’t go planning his funeral.” Bobby sat up and made his way over to Sam who was seated at the small kitchen table. His eyebrows raised, “Don’t get tanked right away,” Bobby said nodding toward the empty bottles on the table. “We don’t know how bad this is and I need ya to be useful.”

Sam nodded and put all four legs of the chair down onto the ground. Bobby shoved a bag of chips at Sam and nodded, telling him to eat to sober him up a little.

That’s about the time that Castiel opened his eyes. He had been plopped into a recliner with the legs pulled up.

Bobby and Sam stopped talking when they noticed him suddenly sitting up a bit.

“Hey Cas, how are you feeling,” Sam asked.

Cas couldn’t answer until his eyes found Dean on the couch and saw that he was still alive. Relief surged through him when his eyes found him, “I’m fine. How is Dean?”

“Still out,” Sam said. “He hasn’t woken up.”

It took Cas a moment to figure out how the chair operated, but once he did he stood up and made his way to Dean. He crouched down beside him on the couch, examining his face.

His head was pounding, his vision was blurry and everything in his body felt sore, but once he laid his hands on Dean’s chest he felt more at ease. His life force was much stronger than when Cas had healed him the first time.

Cas mentally argued with himself about healing Dean. If he did he would likely pass out again, and he was no good to the team like that. He had to stay awake, he had to protect Dean.

“So Cas,” Sam said, interrupting his train of thought. “Why don’t you explain a few things to us.”

Cas raised his eyebrows, Sam seemed to be slightly inebriated. Still, Cas took his question seriously. He turned toward the hunter and stood up. It made him a little dizzy but he did not fall. Both Bobby and Sam looked like they were going to jump out of their chairs to catch him.

“I’m alright,” he assured them, “What would you like to know, Sam?”

Sam leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest. “Have you and Dean had sex together?” His words were a little slurred. Cas wasn’t aware, but once those words spilled out of Sam’s mouth the air became tight with anticipation.

Could it be true? Would they really go that far with each other?”

“Yes,” Cas answered. Not a shred of shame in his response. “Many times.”

Sam’s mouth fell open for a few seconds, then he cleared his throat and glanced at Bobby. He had to bite back a spell of laughter as he remembered finding Cas and Dean in bed together a while ago.

After that question was out of the way and the men regained their composure they could finally get down to business. Still, they needed more information.

“Why is it forbidden for angels and humans to… ya know, get together?”

Castiel looked down at his feet. It seemed that maybe now he was ashamed.

“Man is my Father’s creation… we are meant to love them… not pervert them. We’re two separate species… not meant to mix.”

He looked up at Sam through thick lashes… “It is my fault. I approached Dean when I was having a problem and asked him for assistance…  Since I am in heat and we continued seeing each other we have become Bonded.”

“Wait, what? Heat,” Sam asked.

“Yes, I have reached my sexual prime,” Castiel said without blinking.

Sam stared at him for a long time before Bobby finally cut in, “Why would angels go into heat anyway?”

Cas turned a bit to face Bobby, “In the beginning, God created a certain number of angels, then he gave us a desire to continue the line. We mated until there was an abundance.”

Cas paused for a moment. “Once God was happy with the amount of angels in existence, angel’s going into heat essentially stopped. It stopped for millions of years after that, and some speculated that it would never happen again. With all the fighting between humans and angel’s lately my brothers and sisters have been killed… Causing the number of angels to drop… creating a need to increase our numbers…”

“So now you’ve gone into heat,” Sam murmured to himself.

“What’s all this nonsense about Bonding,” Bobby asked.

“When an angel goes into heat they Bond with their partner of choice. Since Dean and I have been consistently sexually active with each other… we’ve become Bonded.”

Sam rubbed his face, this was a lot to take in. “What all do you know about Bonding, Cas?”

“I don’t know much, it’s something that I never witnessed… When I was created from two Bonded angels, it was nearing the end of the angel creation.” Cas shifted, moving back towards Dean.

“All I know is that it is very important to stay with the person you’re Bonding with because otherwise, the Bond could break. Breaking a Bond… it’s horrifically painful, most angels go insane or die from the pain. However, angel’s that stay together are considerably more powerful than others”

“Well, I guess you two knuckleheads are stuck together…”

“How long… does heat normally last,” Sam asked, rubbing the back of his head.

“The reason for us going into heat is to create more angels since I am with Dean and not contributing to the growth… it could take a while.”

“Well good,” Bobby spoke, “I’d lose my marbles if you ended up pregnant somehow.”

“As would I,” Cas said with a smile, “But angel creation is like human creation. It takes both sexes of angels…”

“I’ll start looking into all the lore that I can,” Sam said. “I’ll try to see if there are any ways to break the Bond so that it is not traumatic…”

When Sam briefly looked up at Cas he saw shock in his eyes. “…You don’t want to break the Bond?”

“N-no, I do not,” Cas stuttered out.

Sam’s eyebrows raised, “Okay, well… it’s still probably best that I do some serious research before they figure out that we are here.”

Cas shrunk down to the floor near Dean on the couch.

“Damn boy, you look like you’re on your last few drops of juice…”

Cas looked up at Bobby who was standing over him, “I put Dean in danger and now I am too weak to heal him… I don’t know how long it will take me to heal before I can.”

“Well fuck,” Bobby said with a loud huff, “I guess we’ll have to do what we did the last time you were like this.”

Cas looked up at him in squinted curiosity.

“It’s a shame because it was no picnic for me… but we need both you and Dean up and able to fight.”

Cas still wasn’t quite sure where Bobby was going with this.

“My soul _dangit_ , don’t you remember how touching my soul helped you recharge?”

Castiel’s eyes widened, Bobby was right! The soul was pure energy, touching it would help him gain enough strength to heal both him and Dean.

“Let’s get this over with,” Bobby said. Like last time, he took off his belt, folded it over and placed it in his mouth.

Sam watched intently while Cas made his way over to Bobby and placed one hand on his shoulder. He looked him in the eyes.

It was strangely intimate, but Cas wasted no time. He was anxious to get Dean back, and he was anxious to get himself back to normal too. He had to go slowly to keep Bobby from being harmed, but he began to force his way through the barrier of skin and bones in way of his soul.

When he found it, its heat was overwhelming…

He only touched it for a moment, it barely grazed against Castiel’s fingertips, but its power was electrifying and gave Cas enough to heal himself. He made quick work of doing so, leaving all but his wings in good condition.

He noticed that it weakened him a bit, so Cas brushed his fingers along Bobby’s soul once more. His power was recharged, and he was back at one hundred percent. He slowly retrieved his hand until it was safe.

Bobby’s eyes were clouded with tears of pain, and he rubbed his jaw from clenching so hard. Sam quickly passed him a hard whiskey to help ease any remaining pain.

“Thank you, Bobby,” Cas said. Bobby gave a rough nod in return.

Cas quickly turned and walked over to Dean. He placed his hands on the man and began to heal him. The cuts, the bruises, everything on Dean’s body that was damaged began to heal.

Heat spread through the two men as Cas’s hand pumped Dean full of positive healing energy when he knew that Dean was back in perfect health he allowed the heat to fade.

It only took a few seconds for Dean’s eyes to finally open.


	15. Chapter 15

Dean’s eyes … mossy green like the trees Castiel flew over in his youth. So bright and comforting. How long had it been since Cas had seen them?

The relief that washed over him when Dean’s eyes slid open was unbelievable. Like a weight had finally come off of his shoulders.

“Hey Cas,” Dean said with a smile. It made Castiel’s body tingle with warmth. He was okay.

“Hello, Dean.”

And then, just as quickly as those eyes met his, they looked away. Sam had made his way over and they were talking to each other. Cas sat on the middle cushion of the couch near Dean’s waist.

“What the hell happened,” Dean said. His voice, it felt like home.

Cas prepared to speak again but the words were stolen by Bobby as he walked into the room.

“Well hello there, Sleeping Beauty.” He handed Dean a cold bottle of sweet tea.

“What the hell is this,” Dean said with a smile as the bottle hit his hand.

“Well hell, you want your first drink to be piss water?”

Dean smirked, “Nothing wrong with a good beer.”

Still, he twisted the cap off the bottle and pressed it to his lips.

Cas couldn’t explain the feeling in his chest. He didn’t like that Dean wasn’t paying attention to him. It made him feel neglected.  The anger inside him, it was aimed right at Bobby and Sam for taking his time away from Dean. He knew he was being unreasonable, and yet it was like he couldn’t turn it off.

And strangely, there was a little hint of sweetness in his mouth. He kept trying to swallow it but it never went away. He just knew it was Dean’s tea he was tasting. He hadn’t longed for human food since he was hit with famine. But Dean just kept nursing that tea and Cas couldn’t handle it. He watched as Dean pulled the bottle away from his lips and let out a satisfied puff of air.

Cas leaned forward and caught Dean’s lips with his. He shoved his tongue between his lips and found the source of the sweetness within Dean’s mouth. Dean made a strange sound and pushed Cas away from him.

“Cas,” he hissed.

Sam cleared his throat and Bobby was a bit red in the face. Cas knew he had crossed a line…but he hadn’t meant to. It just happened. He stood up.

“I apologize, I lost control of myself.”

“No big deal,” Sam said.

Cas felt lost, feeling Dean push him away… it hurt. He excused himself downstairs and decided that he would wait for Dean in the small “fallout shelter” that Bobby had built.

* * *

Dean’s cheeks were still inflamed from embarrassment. Cas had suddenly kissed him with such force, it made him feel hot all over. Sam and Bobby were staring at him now. Waiting for something, but Dean didn’t know what to say.

“So I guess it’s all true,” Sam finally spoke.

Dean swallowed thickly, “Yeah.”

“I don’t want any gory details but… can you explain how this happened?”

How much time had passed since Cas had first approached him? It had all started out so… innocently. Dean really didn’t want to talk about this… especially with his brother… but he couldn’t run from the truth anymore.

So much for a dirty little secret… now they just had a big fucking problem.

“Cas was having… He…” God, how was he supposed to say this? Dean closed his eyes and sighed. “Cas came to me with a boner because he kept getting them and wanted to make them stop… I showed him how… to take care of it.”

Man, the air in the room was tight. They both looked curious and mildly disgusted as realization set in.

“It was supposed to be a one-time thing but,” Dean paused. “Well, it kept happening.”

Dean felt himself blushing as the two men kept staring at him. He couldn’t look at them.

It took a long time before either of them spoke.

Sam was the one to finally break the tension. “So… He’s in heat and you two are… Bonded now?”

“Yeah, and if we’re apart for too long… it’s fucking painful. Like… I need to be next to him or I’m in searing pain… because the connection is breaking. It’s some of the worst pain I’ve felt… it’s like being ripped apart”

Sam looked sympathetic and he waited a few moments before asking, “What happened when you were kidnapped?”

“They locked me in this… room? I don’t know. It was like this big empty void. It was so white that it didn’t feel like a room at all. It felt like I was just… floating. God, it was horrible.”

Bobby and Sam were both leaned forward and listening intently now. They sat in recliners near the couch Dean was spread out on.

“I had to walk around with my eyes closed… It was just sickening. Twice when I was in that room I had a sudden burst of pain. The second time… I shared a vision with Cas.”

“Shared a vision,” Sam asked. His eyebrows scrunched towards each other in concern.

“He was being tortured,” Dean said, he had to take a breath to stay calm. “It was like I was seeing through his eyes… He showed me the sign to the room he was in. It’s how I found him.”

“Wow… I’ve never heard anything like that,” Bobby said.

“I feel uncomfortable being away from him, even now,” Dean admitted.

“Even with him just downstairs?”

Dean felt a little ashamed, them knowing about this… it made him uneasy.

“Yeah.”

“Since the Bond is new… and since it was strained in heaven… maybe it’s best if you two stay close for a while. “

Dean nodded, he was fine with getting away from them both, especially with how awkward this was. Still, Dean needed to know a little more.

“What’s our game plan,” Dean asked.

Sam sighed and rubbed his hands on his jeans. “Bobby and I are going to figure out everything we can about Bonds. I think you and Cas should… spend some time together… make sure your Bond is okay?”

Dean stood up. He kept waiting for a stab of pain to hit him from his fall from heaven, but nothing came. He headed downstairs to meet Cas.

* * *

Cas sat motionless on the small bed in Bobby’s panic room. Dean entered slowly, “Hey Cas,” Dean said softly. He walked over and sat next to the angel. Just being next to him made Dean feel more at ease. He felt the urge to touch Cas but didn’t.

“Dean, I’m sorry.” Cas suddenly said.

“It was just a kiss, no big deal,” Dean said, he felt anxious and he could tell Cas was too.

“No,” Cas said solemnly, his eyes looked clouded. Like his thoughts were far away. “I’ve put you in danger. I let you get kidnapped, I let you freefall, I let you get stabbed… and I couldn’t heal you.”

Dean’s eyes widened and his shoulders seemed to sink as the weight of his words hit him.

“Cas, neither of us thought this would happen; it’s not your fault that we got ambushed.”

“I couldn’t heal you Dean,” he repeated. “You could have died.”

The pain, it was so overwhelming. It was like he could feel Castiel’s sorrow as his own. Dean took Castiel’s hand in his.

“Hey,” he said soothingly. “I’m still here and you _did_ heal me, I’m fine.”

Cas stayed quiet, deep in thought. “Sam thinks we should break the Bond.”

Dean flinched a little. He honestly wasn’t sure how he felt about them being Bonded, but he also wasn’t sure that he wanted to break it either.

“Whether we are Bonded or not, we will still be together.”

Cas stared at Dean for a long time without speaking. He looked so hurt, so exposed. It was driving Dean insane. 

“I don’t think I can handle losing you, Dean,” Cas said with finality.  “I love Sam… he is like a brother to me.” Dean’s eyebrows raised, “But it’s different for you, Dean, I don’t understand it. I… I love you differently than I do him.”

Dean’s whole body felt tense, warning bells were going off in his head. These were the kinds of things that he ran from.

“Okay, buddy,” he said to Cas. He pulled his hand away from Cas’s. “We’ll figure this out, okay?”

Dean stood from the bed, he didn’t see the expression on Castiel’s face, but he felt the pain in his chest just as Cas did.

He was aware that he had just told him, but he felt like Dean still didn’t know how much he was hurting. Castiel stared at Dean’s back as he spoke, “I can’t lose you.”

“Cas, I’m not going anywhere,” Dean said as he spun back around to meet his gaze.

He wasn’t, but it almost felt as if Cas was crying and Dean was comforting him. He wasn’t sure what to do or what to say.  Emotional stuff… that was the monster Dean hated most.

Cas was staring down at his lap, looking utterly depressed. Dean wanted to lighten the situation. He sat down next to the angel again.

Cas leaned his head on Dean’s shoulder. He was breathing a bit heavily, and Dean noticed he was too. It was hot down in this panic room.

“Dean,” Cas said, his voice was deep and gruff. It made Dean shiver.

They shouldn’t. They couldn’t. Bobby and Sam were right upstairs. If they heard them… Dean tried to think of something to distract them from the heat rising between them.

Dean cleared his throat, “After that fall from Heaven… are you okay?”

“No,” Cas responded.  Dean was actually a bit surprised.  He figured Cas had healed himself when he had healed him.

As if Cas was reading his thoughts he said, “I healed myself from most of the damage, but we cannot use our grace to heal our wings. Our wings… they are our responsibility. If they get damaged… they must heal naturally.”

Cas looked at Dean, there was a neediness in his eyes that made Dean feel a little uncomfortable.

“My wing is still shredded from our fall. My brother did a lot of damage to it. Do you think you could help repair them?”

Dean was confused for a moment, “Cas I’d love to stitch you up but… I can’t see your wings…”

Cas nodded, “Yes, but there is a way that you can see them.”

Dean went a little red in the face. All he could think of was Castiel’s wings spread out across the room while he vibrated with need for release.  It made blood rush right to his groin.

“I can share my vision with you. Allow you to see as if you were looking through my eyes.”

“Oh,” Dean said with a nervous laugh, then he thought for a moment. “Will this be like when I saw through your eyes when you were being tortured in Heaven?”

“I allowed you to see through my vessel’s eyes, but this time you will be looking through my angel eyes.”

“Okay,” Dean said. He moved to grab a first aid kit from a shelf. As he walked back toward the angel he thought of another question to ask. “Are we only able to do this… because of the Bond?”

 “Yes,” Cas said. “Our Bond is still new and as it becomes stronger we will be able to do more things. Like sharing thoughts and visions. Allowing you to see through my true eyes…. That does take a bit of grace on my part.”

Dean didn’t like the way he felt. He was scared… actually, he was scared shitless. The longest he’d ever been with anyone was Lisa… and even though he loved her it didn’t end well.

Everyone... Everything he got close to… died. And Cas… Cas wasn’t just someone that he loved… he was his friend, his ally… he could always count on Cas.

Being Bonded… it all felt so permanent. And Dean… he wasn’t strong enough to live without Sam and he wasn’t sure if he could live without Cas either.

“You seem troubled,” Castiel observed.  Dean had zoned out clutching the first aid kit.

“I’m… worried. This Bond feels so permanent…”

“Do you not wish to be Bonded,” Castiel said. His head was tilted as he squinted up at Dean in curiosity.

That struck Dean through the heart, “Honestly, I don’t know…”

Cas looked a bit hurt and Dean took a seat beside him. “What if I… if _we_ become Bonded… if I… if _we_ get too attached… then I won’t be strong enough.”

Castiel turned toward Dean in confusion.

“I’m not strong enough to lose Sam… and I’m not strong enough to lose you either…”

Cas’s eyes grew in surprise, his lips were parted in their usual pout… Dean was saying what he had been saying just a few seconds ago.

“If something were to happen…  I don’t think I could handle it. I’m not sure I want to put us in jeopardy like that.”

“I’ll keep you, safe Dean, I always have…”

“I know… but things happen…”

“Dean,” Cas spoke roughly.  “You are worrying about nothing.”

Dean nodded absently. Maybe he was worrying about nothing but it didn’t stop the fear.

“It’s not nothing.”

Castiel looked Dean in the eyes, “It is fair to say that we are both scared, and we don’t know what is coming next, but I will not leave you, Dean. I will protect you.”

Dean laughed a little, “I know that,” he said, “I’ll protect you too.”

Dean squared his shoulders and felt a little bit better, “Alright, let’s take care of those wings.”


	16. Chapter 16

Dean’s heart thudded loudly in his ears as Castiel slid out of his white button up shirt.

Had Cas mentioned that he was going to be stripping for this? Surely Dean would have remembered him saying something like that. He watched, transfixed, as Cas’s muscles moved beneath his skin. He placed his discarded trench coat on the bed in Bobby’s panic room. 

Dean’s blood pumped hot in his veins and his fingers felt dry and heavy. The only thing he could think of was touching Cas. He just wanted to lay his hands on his skin, like maybe if he just touched him it would be enough to ease the flames scorching through his body.

He was only shirtless and it was for a purely medical reason, but it was enough to get his body humming to life. Dean rubbed the back of his neck and tried not to stare at Cas’s newly exposed skin. It took being in heat to remind him how happy he was to be over puberty. He absolutely hated feeling like a desperate, horny teenager.

Castiel sat on the bed in the panic room facing away from Dean. His trench coat and other clothes were neatly folded and he seemed to be patiently waiting. Dean took a deep, steadying breath and grabbed the first aid kit before approaching him.

He tried to focus on laying out the things he would need to get Cas all stitched up but his heart was still drumming away in his chest. Cas must have known because he asked, “Are you feeling nervous?”

More like horny… or at least that’s what Dean wanted to say. His body was on fire! Still, he had to be reasonable. Cas seriously needed his wings tended to and Bobby and Sam were right upstairs! So Dean bit his tongue and said.  “I’m fine, let’s get you taken care of.”

Dean ducked his head when he noticed Cas squinting over his shoulder at him.

“Now Cas… this is going to hurt. The wound has been open since we fell, right?”

He watched the back of Cas’s head as he nodded and marveled briefly about how dark his hair was.

“I’ll try to numb it… but this isn’t a hospital.”

Cas looked up over his shoulder at Dean and gave him a tired smile. “Thank you for your concern. I am prepared. I’m hoping this eases more pain than it causes.”

“Maybe not at first, but overall it should help.”

Dean began to prepare the needle with a thick, dark thread. He was guessing this was a big slash… so he chose the bulkier string for stitching him from the rusty first aid kit.

“Dean,” Cas called out. Dean grunted in response. “Normally I wouldn’t need to undress but… where my wing meets my back… It hurts.”

“I’ll check it out for you,” Dean assured. He filled a syringe with numbing medicine stolen long ago from a hospital. 

“Okay Cas,” Dean said once everything was prepared, “I’m ready.”

Cas stood up and spun to face Dean. His eyes were deep and intense and he had an air of confident power about him. He reached forward and pressed his thumb into the center of Dean’s forehead. Dean closed his eyes and tried to relax but after a moment Cas’s thumb began to heat up against his skin.

Dean sucked air in through his teeth at the sudden jump in temperature but Cas did not pull away, instead the heat only seemed to increase. It seared against his skin to the point that Dean was convinced that he’d have a mark burned into his forehead. He squeezed his eyes against the pain. It got so hot that he was about to knock Cas’s hand away when the heat suddenly burst through his skull, spilling down his entire body.

It flooded down his torso and limbs in a rush and his skin felt like it tightened around his bones. There was a tremble within him, a vibration of power flowing through him. It zapped through his body, lighting him up with strength and he recognized this power. It was the same power he’d felt surge through him that first time he saw him in that old barn and he just knew… It was Cas. 

Cas pulled his hand away and Dean’s ears were ringing like the first time he heard Castiel’s true voice. His body seemed to relax into the heat and he felt like he could sense everything. Where things were, where Cas stood, even Bobby and Sam upstairs. It was like he could feel their energy.

Slowly Dean opened his eyes. At first, everything was a blinding blue and it made his eyes ache just looking at it. He tried squinting against it but it made no difference.  It took until his eyes adjusted for the blue to fade away and when he could finally see everything was different…

The first thing Dean saw was Castiel and within that moment he was hooked. His mouth fell open in shock and he couldn’t bring himself to look away. To say the least, Cas was glowing. His features were there, but it was hard to focus on them when he looked like a being of light. He was gleaming with colors dancing and swirling within. They swayed and reflected off of him as if he was a prism. The colors were so bright and vivid like suddenly Dean was looking at the world in HD for the first time.

Then, there were Castiel’s eyes. It didn’t seem possible, but somehow his eyes seemed to be even bluer than before. They glowed with his angelic grace, but not in the sense of a threat in battle or spilling over in sex, instead, it was just there, gleaming lazily with the other colors surrounding him.

Dean was _completely_ captivated by Castiel, there were colors swirling within him that Dean had never even seen before, he couldn’t even describe them because he could barely comprehend them but God, _they were so beautiful._   Cas… was so beautiful. And then there was the energy… it was pouring off of him in waves and vibrating around him. It seemed like at any moment Cas would burst from his vessel because it was too small to contain him.

Dean just kept looking him up and down in disbelief. There was no way this was real, it just… it couldn’t be. He reached forward, unable to help himself, and placed a hand on Castiel’s chest. Electricity shot through him, sending a pleasant shock through his body and he gasped at the feeling. Cas was so warm and he stared at Dean with a quiet curiosity. He had the smallest smile on his lips.

“Dean?”

“Is this… Is this your true form,” Dean suddenly stuttered out and Cas’s smile grew into a full blown grin. It only made him look more God-like to Dean.

“I cannot show you my true form,” Cas answered. “It would blind you.”

That was right, he remembered the first time he’d heard about Castiel. He remembered sitting next to Pamela when she demanded Cas show himself to her and how it burned her eyes from the inside out. All he could think was that there was more… There was so much more to the picture that Dean couldn’t even fathom.

“You are seeing traces of my grace.”

Dean watched as Cas turned and walked back to the bed. Every time he moved the colors within him danced and hummed with energy. It took all of Dean’s concentration just to follow Cas to where he had seated himself on the bed.

With his back facing Dean once more and without so much as a glance, Castiel’s wings seemingly came out of nowhere. The tips of the arches of his wings seemed to materialize against his shoulder blades pushing their way up and out until reaching their natural stopping point. Then with a gust of wind, his wings spread out, stretching across the entire room. His wingspan was incredible, even with one wing struggling to stretch anywhere as much as the other.

In this moment, Dean was too mesmerized to notice the damaged wing and could only see the beauty. They were huge, thick and black like charcoal.  Dean gasped just looking at them and had to remind himself to breathe. This was just so incredible. Two wings that he had only seen the shadows of… and they were so much more than he ever imagined. 

“They’re black,” Dean whispered.  He hadn’t meant to say it out loud but his senses were so overwhelmed that the words just spilled out of his mouth without consent. Unable to help himself Dean reached forward, hesitating briefly before pushing his fingers deep into the feathers. He took in a stuttered breath, they were softer than anything he had ever touched before. Despite the softness of them they still had incredible strength to them. They didn’t bend under his touch, instead, they pushed back against him. Castiel’s feathers were long and perfect, each one in line with the one before it. Dean couldn’t keep himself from touching them. He was completely in awe watching them bristle and spread from his touch as he ran his fingers through them.

“I can’t believe these have been here all along and I couldn’t even see them,” Dean said in a daze before turning his attention to the other wing. That’s when Dean saw it. The terrible gash ripping through Cas’s wing. The feathers were ripped away and any that were left were bent unnaturally.  The wound hung open, the skin flayed back like drapery. Dean’s throat dried up just looking at it. It was horrific to look at in contrast to the fantastical world around him and it reminded Dean exactly why he was looking through these eyes in the first place. He needed to focus.

Since this was Cas’s first time being stitched up, Dean felt like he needed to walk him through the process.

“Okay,” Dean spoke, his voice sobered from all its previous wonderment, “I’m going to sterilize it… It’s gonna burn like hell.”

Castiel nodded as Dean lifted the bottle of rubbing alcohol from the small rusted first aid kit. Dean quickly unscrewed the lid and splashed the clear liquid onto a rag. He hesitated for a moment before gently pressing the rag into Castiel’s wound.

Cas winced and sucked air through his teeth, creating a loud hiss of pain. Dean watched his wing jerk and he froze for a second before continuing. He dabbed the rag slowly along the cut, pulling away some of the caked on blood and dirt from the time the wound had been left open and untreated. Poor Cas was making all kinds of little grunts of pain while the hunter moved silently against his wound. Sterilizing was always the worst part.

Dean was doing everything he could to work quickly and end Cas’s pain. Once Dean was satisfied he threaded the needle. With vibrant colors swirling past his eyes, and things vibrating with intense energy, it made the usually simple task a bit more frustrating.

“Okay, Cas… I’m going to numb you and then stitch you closed. You’ll feel the prick of the shot but it should be pretty painless from here on out.”

Cas nodded. He sat rigidly and his hands were clenched into the bed near his knees. He was leaned forward and his head was bowed between his shoulders. Dean injected him quickly, working his way around the wound and pumping the numbing medicine around the skin. Castiel seemed to relax a bit so Dean figured the medicine was doing its job. He asked a few times and poked a few spots to make sure that Cas was completely numb before going to work on stitching the skin. He’d been doing this for so long that his hands moved like a skilled surgeon. It may not have been hospital protocol, but it was definitely the next best thing.  It wasn’t long before he was able to tie off the last stitch.

“Okay,” Dean said. “I’m done, now all we need to do is bandage up your wing so that you don’t rip the stitches.”

Dean placed his hand on Castiel’s wing, “I need you to pull your wing closed.”

Cas nodded and grimaced in pain as he slowly withdrew his wing until it was against his back. Dean took a long clean bandage and wrapped the wing until it was snuggly bound shut. It would take some serious effort for Cas to outstretch his wing now.

Dean checked the other wing again just to ensure that it was not damaged and then remembered that Cas had requested that he check where his wing met his back as well. Dean placed his hand on the angel’s back. He leaned close, examining the area. Castiel’s body seemed to tense up but Dean just ignored it. Without thinking, Dean ran one of his fingertips along the skin there.

Cas gasped quietly and his back arched just slightly. Dean could feel the faintest tingle of pleasure in his back, but he was frozen. Hearing the angel make a sudden noise had him fearing that he had hurt Cas.

“You okay,” Dean asked.

Suddenly Cas’s face seemed very red. “The… the skin is just really sensitive there. It causes me pleasure when you touch it.”

How could he have forgotten?

Dean felt his own face going red with embarrassment. He rubbed his neck and looked at the ground. “It -uh, I think your muscle just got strained when he grabbed you. You’re feeling the pain of him jerking you backward. That’s why it’s hurting.”

Castiel stood up and made his way to stand in front of Dean. “Thank you for your assistance.”

His eyes burned like blue flames, swirling with power and colors, mesmerizing Dean once again. Then Cas reached forward and placed his thumb in the center of Dean’s forehead. It seemed to happen so quickly… the colors, the vibrations, the light within Castiel… It all faded away.

When everything went back to normal Dean felt dizzy. So much so that he stumbled a little. He had to blink and stand still for several minutes before he could really see again. The world seemed so bleak and empty without the vivid colors and vibrating energy. It was as if he was Dorothy waking up to the normal black and white world instead of the wondrous colors of Oz. It was a lot easier for him to concentrate though and he was happy knowing that Cas’s wing was taken care of.

Still, the angel had a very sad expression on his face.

* * *

 

Castiel stood in front of Dean, staring at him in curiosity. He was showing him just a glance into his world, the bare minimum of what he could see at any time, but Dean still seemed completely blown away. His mouth hung open and his eyes were transfixed, staring hard at Cas’s chest. It was an incredibly strange feeling for Cas because Dean had never looked at him like this before.

It made Cas smile lightly to himself until suddenly Dean was touching him. He was slowly sliding his palm over Cas’s chest and trailing his fingers up to his collarbone. It made Castiel swallow thickly. Dean never really touched him with such fondness… such intimacy… and suddenly the need for more of it was burning in his chest.

As much as he longed to continue he had to have his wing cared for first. It ached constantly and he was to the point where Cas wasn’t able to handle it anymore. He spun around and walked to the little bed in the room. Thankfully Dean followed him and once he was close enough Cas finally spread his wings.

Dean was gasping again, louder this time.  He looked like he been struck by them, like just seeing them knocked the wind out of them. He was moving forward, diving his fingers into their feathers without a second thought. It was Castiel’s turn to gasp as Dean’s fingertips pushed their way deeper, rubbing over his feathers and into his skin. He hummed at the feeling, no one had ever touched him this way, no one had ever touched his wings.

The feeling of it made his head rush and he couldn’t help but spread his feathers even more to get as much of Dean’s touch as possible. Dean didn’t seem to notice though, he was too mesmerized to hear Castiel’s little sounds of pleasure, he didn’t notice Cas’s eyes sealed in peaceful bliss.

“They’re black,” Dean whispered, almost as if he was in shock and Cas couldn’t help but look back at him. The wonder on his face was almost child-like but when his head turned to look at his other wing it rapidly dissolved away. Suddenly he had a look of pure horror.

Cas felt his shoulders slump just seeing the joy leave Dean’s face, he reached forward like he might touch the wound but froze. His eyes were wide and green and petrified. He swallowed slowly, making his throat bob before reaching for the rag he’d set out previously. His eyes met Castiel’s and he nodded, the fun was over and it was all business now.

“Okay, I’m going to sterilize it,” Dean said. “It’s gonna burn like hell.”

Castiel nodded and turned away as Dean splashed a liquid onto a rag. He didn’t want to watch this, he knew it was going to hurt so he hoped averting his gaze would make it more bearable. The smell of the liquid Dean was using spread through the room quickly assaulting Castiel’s nose and the next thing he knew Dean was suddenly touching his wing.

Pain erupted through his wing and straight up his back. He arched forward and sucked air in through his teeth at the sensation. The burn of the sterilization spread slowly as well and Cas hated it. It felt like his skin was on fire. He pressed the back of his hand to his lips to keep from moaning out too loudly in pain but it was hard for him to keep it all back.

Dean worked quickly and Castiel was thankful for that, but he certainly never wanted to feel pain like this ever again in his life. He would do whatever he could to avoid it. The sting ebbed away slowly but his newly cleaned skin ached as it was exposed to the air. Castiel felt frayed and overwhelmed. His muscles were clenched hard in an attempt to fight off the assault of pain hitting him.

“Okay, Cas… I’m going to numb you and then stitch you closed. You’ll feel the prick of the shot but it should be pretty painless from here on out.”

Painless, that sounded heavenly. He nodded, encouraging Dean to continue. It was a strange sensation when the medicine spread through him. The pain dissolved, but it almost seemed replaced with a weight where it once was. Cas wasn’t sure if he liked feeling numb, but he definitely preferred it to feeling pain.

Things seemed to go a bit quicker from there. Occasionally Cas would look over his shoulder to watch Dean as he worked on his wing. He wore the same concentration he’d seen on the man as when he would work on his car. He didn’t mean to stare at him but he couldn’t help it, it made him jump when Dean suddenly straightened up and met his gaze.

“Okay, I’m done,” Dean said. Cas felt his body relax a little. “Now all we need to do is bandage up your wing so that you don’t rip the stitches.”

Castiel nodded. Dean gently wrapped his hand around the end of his wing, “I need you to pull your wing closed.”

Cas did just that, he slowly withdrew his wing until it was flush against his body like normal. It hurt so badly having to move it, but Dean slowly guided him through the process. Once it was closed he wrapped it with a large, long bandage to keep it closed.

Finally, they were done. Cas slowly withdrew his wings completely. He didn’t need them and definitely wouldn’t be flying anytime soon, so putting them away for good was probably the best idea for now. He was back to being his normal, human-looking self. He stood up and made his way over to Dean, so he could end the connection.

Cas placed his thumb back in the center of Dean’s forehead and focused for a minute before withdrawing his grace and ending Dean’s ability to see through his eyes. Dean stumbled once the connection broke and it took him a minute to get his bearings but within minutes he was okay.

Cas stared at the hunter intensely, longing for him. It wasn’t sexual it was just… human. He was emotionally and physically drained. When Dean had been touching his skin and his wings it had felt so incredible. Just having the hunter’s rough hands on his body, just feeling them on his skin. It made things seem easier, it made him feel like everything was going to be alright despite the obvious threat looming in the air around him.

With Dean, he wasn’t sure how to ask for these things. Sex was different, it was easier for Dean than intimacy was. It was a task and once completed they could go back to pretending that they weren’t in heat and they weren’t Bonded. That’s just how Dean worked.

He stared at Dean with a look of want and a furrowed brow, not realizing that Dean had noticed him.

“What is it Cas, are you still in pain,” Dean asked and it made Cas blink back into reality. Dean’s green eyes were staring right back at him with the same level of intensity like he was trying to figure out what it was that Cas needed just by looking at him.

Cas stepped forward awkwardly until he was just a few inches in front of Dean before reaching up a little. His movements were jerky and forced but he didn’t know what else to do. Dean’s eyebrows shot up in shock but Cas stuck to his guns and held his arms open, silently asking for a hug.

“Aw cmon man, what the hell…” Dean muttered angrily under his breath. He blushed deeply and Cas tried not to look him in the eye because he figured it would be easier for Dean if he didn’t. Cas was about to give up and drop his arms back to his sides when Dean closed the remaining space between them and wrapped his arms around Cas.

His movements were awkward too but that didn’t matter. Dean’s body was firm and Cas couldn’t help but just let himself sink into the other man. Dean ran his hands up Cas’s back and squeezed him closer. Cas let his eyes fall closed as he breathed in Dean’s scent. He could feel himself relaxing into Dean’s touch. Cas hoped that Dean didn’t mind, he was aware that the hunter’s heart rate had increased. Dean nuzzled against Cas’s neck just beneath his ear, it sent pleasant tingles up Cas’s spine.

“You’re being such a girl,” Dean huffed but Cas doubted that there was any truth to his complaint. Still, he figured he’d play along.

“I’m sorry, Dean.”

After a few more seconds Dean pulled away, rubbing the back of his neck and walking over to sit on the small bed in the center of Bobby’s panic room. Cas followed him and sat down next to him.

“Being separated in Heaven really fucked up our Bond, didn’t it,” Dean suddenly asked.

The question surprised Cas but once he really thought about it… he knew Dean was right. It wasn’t just the physical abuse either, being separated and unable to get back to each other really put a strain on their connection. It felt weaker like it had been pulled too far apart. Cas was both surprised and relieved that Dean had felt it too.

“What can we do to fix it,” Dean asked.

Cas looked up from his lap to find Dean staring at him intently. With how things had been progressing for them Cas figured that Dean would be more likely to want to break it than to try and fix it. Dean seemed to recognize Cas’s surprise.

“It hurts and I don’t like the way I feel,” Dean said. “When our Bond is at full health it makes us stronger.”

It was a funny way of saying it but Cas understood what Dean meant.

“So, how do we strengthen it,” Dean asked again.

Cas shifted. He wasn’t really the expert on the subject, he grew up during the end of the original angel breeding process. He never needed to learn about it. Still, there were basic things about it that he’d learned over the years of hearing other angel’s talk about it.

“Being with the person you’re Bonded with makes it stronger, just being together will heal it over time.”

Dean nodded and looked away, “So there’s no quick fix?”

“Bonds are based on intimacy and mating, having sex helps to strengthen them after traumatic events.”

Dean suddenly stood from the bed, Cas could see his ears flushing but the hunter would not look at him.

“We can’t do that,” Dean reasoned, “S-Sam and Bobby are right upstairs. They’d hear us.”

Humans were strange to Cas, sex was a natural part of life. Why were they so ashamed about it? Cas wasn’t sure what to say so he kept himself quiet, instead, he just squinted at the hunter until he turned around and looked at him. His face was red and he didn’t hold eye contact very long before looking to the floor.

Dean wanted this, he wanted to have sex.

Castiel stood up and strode over to him, grabbing Dean’s face and pulling him into a kiss. Dean sucked in a surprised breath through his nose and pressed his lips heatedly into Cas’s before abruptly pulling away. He breathed for a second before turning to look at Cas. “We can’t,” he said.

“Dean.”

“Cas, we can’t,” He tried to say with a little more authority.

Cas stared at him with squinted eyes for a long time before dropping his gaze, he pressed his lips together and didn’t say anything. His vessel’s heart was thudding lightly in his chest and he could feel the edge of that overwhelming heat wave but he didn’t argue.

“It doesn’t have to be full blown sex, Dean,” Cas said as he walked back toward the bed. He had decided that he would put his shirt and coat back on. “Any intimacy will do.”

That must have been the only thing Dean needed to hear because within seconds he was stomping over toward him. He grabbed Cas’s shoulders before yanking him into a kiss. It made the air evaporate from Cas’s lungs in a rush. Dean’s lips moved roughly and hungrily against his. He reached his hand up and cupped Cas’s head in his hands. His fingers slid into his hair and cradled behind his ear. Dean led Cas to tilt his head to the side, angling him so that he could deepen the kiss.

His tongue ghosted over Cas’s bottom lip and Cas readily opened his mouth. Their tongues met and Dean pulled his body closer. One of Dean’s hands rubbed up Cas’s back, ghosting over one of his shoulder blades. It made Cas’s body squeeze in anticipation. He gasped, breaking the kiss. Dean pressed his forehead lightly against Cas’s while he caught his breath.

Then Dean stood up straighter, pulling Cas’s body flush with his. He looked down at Cas with lustful eyes before he pressed against that spot on his back again. Pleasure raced through Cas’s body again and this time it was much stronger. He moaned at the touch and pressed his hips forward into Dean’s.

“Shh,” Dean whispered in his ear as he continued to rub the spot. It made Cas’s whole body shiver, “They’ll hear you.”

Cas nodded and tried to keep himself quiet but Dean just kept pressing his fingers into his skin. He rubbed up and down until Cas was flushed and whimpering lightly into Dean’s ear. Cas felt like he was on fire, like he was literally enflamed. His skin danced with tightness and his heart pounded with rising heat. He couldn’t hear everything that Dean was thinking, but he was getting flashes and it was enough to fuel his rising desires. He definitely wanted sex and it lit the fire inside of Castiel.

“Dean…”

The angel was whimpering and he wrapped his arms up around Dean’s neck. Dean’s lips returned to his in a hot rush. His hands were on Cas’s hips, pulling at him almost desperately.

“We should slow down,” Dean whispered against Cas’s neck before pulling his earlobe into his mouth and sucking on it. Cas couldn’t help but gasp at the sensation of it. It raced right to his dick which was painfully pinned against his thigh and pressed into Dean in front of him.

“Yeah,” Cas breathed although he’d do anything to keep Dean going like this forever. Dean’s fingers were pushing Cas back just enough for him to get his hands on his belt buckle. He hastily pulled it open. His button was pulled undone and his zipper was pulled undone and at the rate Dean was going Cas didn’t know what would happen.

They kissed each other frantically, like they didn’t know when they’d get another chance too and with how things were in Heaven, who knows when they would.

Dean pulled back to breathe, holding Cas’s face in his hands while he swallowed and tried to calm himself.

“Lay down,” He said, nodding toward the bed.

Cas turned and went back to the cot while Dean walked over to the door in the panic room before pulling it closed. He walked back over to Cas, crawling over him and bringing their lips together again. The bed squeaked under their combined weight and Dean hated the sound of it, but he was having a hard time concentrating on anything that didn’t involve Cas right now.

Cas’s breath hitched when Dean’s hand suddenly rubbed over his erection. It made his body rush with desire and pleasure. He moaned lightly at the feeling of it, he wanted more.

“Cas, we shouldn’t do this,” Dean whispered in his ear. Cas shuddered and clung to Dean’s shoulders. He pulled Cas’s pants down just far enough to free his dick and was slowly starting to stroke it. Cas’s nerve endings were lighting up in pleasure. It was only the beginning, but it was already getting difficult to form words.

“Dean,” Cas murmured, pulling Dean closer to his body. He wants to feel his weight on top of him, he wants… he wants…

“Dean, please… inside…”

Dean gasps lightly and his hands are already grabbing at Cas’s pants and yanking them off completely. Dean is still completely dressed but they don’t have time for that right now, instead, Dean is pulling Cas up a little, lining up his hips before sliding his fingers up to Cas’s mouth.

He has a lustful look in his eye when he lightly presses against Cas’s bottom lip and whispers, “Suck.”

Cas opens his mouth, taking Dean’s fingers into his mouth and rubbing his tongue over them. Dean’s eyes flutter closed and his hips rut forward as Cas begins to suck on them, coating them with saliva. Dean pulls lightly and Cas lets him retrieve his fingers. The hungry look in the hunter’s eyes is overwhelming. His pupils are blown wide and he’s breathing through an open mouth.

He slides his fingers down to Cas’s entrance and pushes a finger inside. Cas was squirming and panting beneath Dean, looking up at him with a desperate look.

“Dean, I can use my grace... You don’t have to,” Castiel huffed out. His face was flushed as Dean began to finger him. It wasn’t that Cas didn’t like this part, it was just that he didn’t want to wait.

“Cas,” Dean whispered. He began working his finger faster before quickly slipping in a second. “You can’t use your grace for that, it’s… _unholy_.”

He whispered the last word directly into the angel’s ear, making Cas shudder deeply.

Once his fingers were slipping easily he them within Cas, searching for that bundle of nerves. He spread his fingers, trying to open him up.

“You can’t use your angel mojo for something so… _filthy_.”

Castiel shuddered again, moaning low and deep. It was so intense that it made Dean throb and moan too.

“Dean, inside… please,” Castiel begged. Cas is jutting his hips and clawing at his arms and Dean wonders if maybe Cas likes the dirty talk a little.

Dean swallowed and withdrew his fingers. He made quick work of coating his dick with his own spit before grabbing Cas’s hips and lining up his erection to Cas’s entrance.

“Stay quiet,” Dean says. The bed squeaks under his weight but he’s too far gone to not do this now. Within seconds he’s pushing into that tight ring of muscles.

Cas is moaning so deliciously that Dean has to cup his hand over his mouth just to block out the sound. He can still feel the angel’s mouth vibrating against his hand as he slips into Cas’s tight heat. It’s all encompassing and Dean is melting into the pleasure of it.

When he bottoms out within Cas, he’s overwhelmed. Cas is panting and squeezing his muscles so hard around him.

“Shh,” , he tries to sooth him. “Just relax.”

Cas is staring up at the ceiling with wide eyes and he’s panting heavily but Dean’s words must work because within minutes Cas is relaxing and Dean is able to start moving. Slowly he’s pushing the angel with each thrust, making the damn bed whine lightly as he moves.

He starts out slowly with no intention of speeding up. He wants to take his time, he wants to feel this. He wants to heal the tears in their Bond. They’re chest to chest and just holding each other while Dean pumps gentle, even thrusts into Cas, brushing against his prostate each time.

Cas tries begging Dean to go faster but the hunter just won’t do it. Dean lifts Cas’s legs to get a better angle and pushes into him with more force without ever picking up his pace. Cas is practically crying each time Dean hits that spot within him. It’s agonizingly blissful and it’s filling him to the brim. Cas can feel it building within him, zapping all throughout his body to the point of every nerve-ending feeling like it might burst.

“Dean,” Cas is whispering. It’s hard to understand everything that he says because Dean is sure it’s not all in English and the angel is mumbling in such a quiet blissed-out tone, “Ah-amazing. I-I love you, I love you,” he keeps murmuring into Dean’s shoulder and the cot is squeaking gently beneath him. Dean’s heart is slamming against his chest and even if Cas is only saying it because he’s strung out on pleasure, it’s enough.

“Shh,” He has to whisper again. Just hearing Cas says that makes him feel like his chest might burst. He’s keeping that steady pace and nuzzling into Cas’s neck and ear. “I know,” He says because he feels like he has to say something but he can’t say _that,_ “I know.”

Cas is writhing in pleasure beneath him, arching and clawing at Dean’s back. Dean is still dressed and the t-shirt he’s wearing is rubbing against Cas’s dick and it’s driving him crazy. The rough feel of it against the head of his cock is practically making him see stars. His eyes are sealed shut and he’s mewling with each connecting thrust. Words are slipping out of his mouth in Enochian and English and it’s all nonsense to Dean but he can’t get enough.

It’s so hot and the pleasure feels like it’s resting right against the brim of spilling over. Like any second either of them could slide over the line. Cas gasps for air and drops one of his arms to the mattress. Within minutes Dean’s hand finds his and they interlock their fingers.

“Dean,” Cas groans. He’s never felt as close to the hunter as he does in this moment. Their bodies are tightly meshed together and neither can get enough of the other. Each movement effects the other. Every press, every touch.

“Dean, I-”

When he hears Cas’s warning, Dean slows his hips to a stop pressing himself deep within Castiel. He’s leaning forward heavily, continuously applying direct pressure to Cas’s prostate.

The angel is quickly tensing more and more beneath him as Dean just focuses his weight into Cas.

It’s right there, it’s right on that spot. He was gonna snap at any second. The pleasure is just building within him, threatening to spill over with each second of growing intensity. Just as Dean steadily pressed into him, Cas is greedily pressing back.

Cas’s breath just gets faster and faster as Dean presses within, his dick twitching within the angel because he’s not sliding anymore but Jesus it feels amazing with how tightly Cas is squeezing against him.

Cas is sobbing and begging for more of whatever this is. Dean’s never done it like this before and his body is overloaded with bliss. All he can do is keep his mouth open in a continuous, “Ahh!” and Dean has to keep his hand over his mouth in an attempt to shush him.

Dean pulls back just slightly before nudging back forward against Cas’s prostate and with a loud cry and a hard shot the angel is cumming and quaking and squeezing all his muscles up and down Dean’s shaft. Dean moans at the feeling of it as Cas’s insides squeeze around him so desperately. He eases himself out of the angel and with a few quick tugs he’s sliding into his own orgasm, moaning into Cas’s skin as he finishes.

It took a few moments to get them both comfortably situated on the small bed, but finally, the two were able to relax. Cas had his head against Dean’s chest and Dean had an arm wrapped around Cas’s shoulders. As they caught their breath Cas finally felt like he could relax. He could already tell that their Bond was doing better, they were safe and they were together. Cas looked up at Dean’s face, he was covered in sweat with heavy eyelids but he had a sleepy smile on his face.

“Dean, thank you.”

Dean chuckled a little, “You don’t have to thank me every time.”

Cas nodded and Dean exhaled another breath before closing his eyes. He pressed himself more into Cas, allowing his muscles to go slack. He didn’t really want to sleep, he just wanted to relax for a minute. To stay here and hold Cas and just forget about all the chaos that their lives had become.

Dean wouldn’t be so lucky though because he heard someone clear their throat before knocking on the door.

“Uh… Dean?”


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Plot twist, the asshole gets a name! It's pronounced Zah-Car-Ee-El (Zachariel)

Dean bolted upright and all his previous relaxation evaporated. Shit! He knew the voice was Sam’s and he was right outside the door! Had he heard them? Did he know? Dean’s heart raced as he looked at Cas.

“Zap your clothes on,” Dean whispered. “Clean us both up.”

Cas nodded and did just that. Dean jumped out of the bed and scrambled toward the door, tugging on his clothes to get them situated as he went. He looked back over his shoulder to ensure that Cas was dressed.

“Be cool,” he whispered over his shoulder. Then he yanked open the door. Sam’s hair moved with the gust of wind the door produced.

“Hey,” Dean said casually, slipping right into the part of ‘cool older brother.’ He leaned against the doorway and crossed his arms.

“Hey,” Sam replied. His brow was furrowed and he wore a frown on his face. “I didn’t want to barge in on anything… I’ve learned my lesson.”

Sam was referring to when he busted into Dean’s motel room to find him naked and curled around Cas. Sam was just dying to investigate the strange angel occurrence he’d heard and wouldn’t take no for an answer, little did he know the “angel occurrence” had actually just been him and Cas having sex for the first time. Dean swallowed and tried not to react to the memory.  It’s a wonder his brother believed that they weren’t together back then.

“Come on Sammy, be real,” Dean lied. He looked like he was appalled by the idea. “We wouldn’t do something like that here. Bobby would probably kill me.”

Dean looked back at Cas and gave him a quick wink. It fascinated the angel to no end that Dean could lie so easily to his brother. Sam had a knowing look on his face but that didn’t stop him from happily accepting his brother’s lie.

“Bobby and I found some information you guys might want to hear,” Sam said, “It could be the answer we’re looking for.”

Dean and Cas shared a quick glance at each other before Dean nodded. With that, the three of them were headed up the stairs.

Cas stared at his feet as they stomped up the steps. He could feel an excitement that wasn’t his dancing in his chest leaving him to assume that it was coming from Dean.

Sam and Dean were having a conversation and Cas tried to focus on what was happening in front of him but he kept hearing murmurs.

It was coming from what Dean called his “angel radio” and it was difficult to hear what they were saying. It was as if this really was a radio and his connection was too weak. Cas was so focused on hearing what the angels were saying that he tuned out of the boy's conversation completely.

When the trio finally made it upstairs Bobby sat waiting for them at a small wooden table. Books were piled on top of each other, some open and some closed, papers of every sort were strewn across the table as well. Sam’s laptop was also on the table, looking completely out of place. The three quickly took a seat joining Bobby.

“Okay,” Sam spoke, kicking the team into action. “Here’s what we’ve got so far. I wasn’t able to find anything online about Bonding; that just led me to advice about bonding with your pet and what not.”

Dean was leaned back in his chair with his arms crossed, he snorted in laughter at Sam’s comment. 

“Yeah,” Sam agreed, nodding at his brother. “Then I tried “Angel-Human relationships.” At first, it was a lot of strange religious blogs that discussed the topic but never really confirmed or denied if it was possible. However, the more I dug the more I found.”

Dean’s eyebrows raised in curiosity. Sam pointed to a large Bible on the table.

“In Genesis chapter 6, verses 1 and 2, it reads: “Now it came about, when men began to multiply on the face of the land, and daughters were born to them, that the sons of God saw that the daughters of men were beautiful; and they took wives for themselves, whomever they chose.”

Sam leaned forward and licked his lips. Dean could tell he was going full geek mode on this.

“So basically what it’s saying is that as man populated the earth the “sons of God” or angels, as we call them, began to marry the humans,” Sam paused for a moment to look at his notes before continuing. Dean was thankful that his brother was breaking it down into English he could understand.

“In the same chapter of Genesis, verse 4, it mentions that angels and women began to have children. Then in verses 5 through 7, it reads, **“** And God saw that the wickedness of man was great in the Earth and that every imagination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually.And it repented the Lord that he had made man on the earth, and it grieved him at his heart.And the Lord said I will destroy man whom I have created from the face of the Earth...”

Sam paused for a moment to let it sink in, “That’s why he destroyed the Earth with water.”

“Destroyed the Earth with water,” Dean repeated, “like the big flood with the Ark or whatever?”

“Yeah and I read somewhere else that the reason for the flood was because Noah and his family were the only pure humans left. Everyone else had angels in their heritage.”

“Starting to seem that this whole angel-human stuff ain’t good business,” Bobby spoke gravely.

Dean was overcome with a sinking feeling. Maybe Bobby was right, humans and angels together seemed to equal massive floods or at least extreme water damage…

Cas, who had been lost in trying to decode what he was hearing, suddenly felt Dean’s wave of despair. He wasn’t sure what he’d missed… He looked to Dean’s face for answers, but Dean had his mask on, blocking out his emotions like a professional actor. His jaw was set and his eyes seemed shadowed… No matter how long he looked at him Dean never met his gaze.

Sam was quiet for a moment following Bobby’s comment, but then he broke the silence by saying, “Get this, Bobby found something too.”

Bobby turned the book that was in front of him to face Dean. Dean had looked at this book in the past maybe a dozen times or more, and yet Bobby was about to show him something he’d never seen within its pages. Dean leaned forward in his chair, resting his elbows on the table. Bobby pointed toward a sentence at the bottom of the page.

“This book mentions angels and how they mate for life,” Bobby stated. He lifted his hat to scratch his forehead. Dean skimmed over the text while Bobby spoke, “Angels were known to be very strict about how couples mated. They were expected to mate within their rank.”

“Rank,” Dean questioned.

“Choir, actually,” Cas suddenly spoke up. “There are nine choirs of angels.”

“Exactly, thanks, Cas,” Sam said, nodding toward the angel. “That’s why Archangels have more power than just a regular angel. They are a higher choir.”

Dean nodded in understanding. He wondered idly what choir Cas was from but couldn’t hold the thought for too long because Sam was still talking.

“So if a Seraphim wanted to mate with a Virtue, it would be a problem.”

Dean was briefly confused, weren’t virtues qualities a person was supposed to have like… patience? He figured that Sam would know what he was talking about so he ignored his confusion and tried to listen.

“The pair would either be forced to break up or… they would have to face the trials.”

“Trials,” Dean asked. His eyebrows tilted up toward one another, this was all starting to sound a little bit crazy.

“Yeah, these trials are designed to test both members of the Bond. If they can pass them and prove that their Bond is strong despite their differences then the other angels would honor their Bond and let them live in peace.”

Dean’s eyes went wide and his mind started buzzing with possibilities. Maybe this was how they could get the angels off their backs and go back to a somewhat normal life?

“Passing the trials would permanently seal your Bond. Spells, rituals… nothing would be able to break it.”

Sam stared at Dean intently, his eyes bore into Dean’s. Dean wasn’t sure what he wanted from him so he just stared back blankly. Finally, he shrugged.

Sam sighed, “There’s no way you could survive the trials, Dean… and God destroyed the Earth because of man and angels mating,” Sam trailed off looking expectantly at Dean.

Dean felt like the air had been knocked out of his lungs but he was too paralyzed to gasp more in. His body tightened with an intense wave of anger. It shot through his entire being, but it didn’t belong to him. It was Castiel’s anger Dean was feeling.

“Are you suggesting that we break the Bond,” Cas asked. His tone was dark, but the anger was well hidden. Sam didn’t seem to notice, he sat back in his chair with a heavy sigh.

“Honestly, yes.”

 _Oooh_ , there it was again, that dangerous anger burning through him. It made Dean’s skin feel hot, he looked to Cas but Cas was already speaking.

“We cannot break the Bond,” Cas burst out. It shocked the entire group, including Dean, who was feeling the anger himself. “Dean could die.”

“Cas,” Dean said.

Castiel ignored him. Dean kept trying to catch Cas’s eye if he could just meet his gaze maybe he could calm the angel down. Instead, Cas just sat fuming at his brother.

“I understand the possible outcome,” Sam said. “Maybe… maybe it would be easier if we were with him. If we stayed by his side while the Bond broke…”

Somehow the anger within him was growing. Dean was finding it hard to breathe.

“Cas…”

“If worse came to worse and Dean died… we’d find a way to get him back.”

Dean took a deep breath in, trying to ease the anger bursting through his chest. Dean shifted, staring at Cas’s face but he continued to ignore him. He was about to reach for him but Bobby suddenly spoke.

"Sam,” he said, his voice was rough and angry, like he was scolding him. “You two jumping over one another to sell your souls or trying to find some rabbit hole into the afterlife ain’t helping nobody. You can only play a trick so many times before it fails.”

“It’s not even a guarantee that Dean would die; it’s all hypothetical. Maybe it’s not as bad as the lore suggests. It could be easier since Dean is a human. Maybe we could find a spell-”

In that moment, all Dean could see was red. The anger was so strong that he couldn’t move. While he was frozen to his chair in secondhand fury Castiel was standing. He slammed his hands down on the small table so hard that it crumbled to the floor, kicking up dust and splintering the wood.

“Are you suggesting that we just let Dean die,” Castiel was screaming. His energy was pouring off of him in thick, cold waves. Both Sam and Bobby were staring up at him completely dumbfounded, their mouths hung open in shock while Cas continued.

“Maybe Dean could survive the Bond breaking, but he could still lose his mind! Breaking a Bond is like having your soul ripped out while you’re wide awake! He would be nothing but a shell of himself!”

Castiel was waving his arms and lights were bursting and all of this was so out of character for him. Dean finally came out of his paralysis and was on his feet in an instant. He collided with Cas’s chest and grabbed at his arms before shoving him toward the kitchen. He was repeatedly saying his name, trying to get Cas to stop fighting against him until finally, Cas allowed Dean to push him out of the room.

“Cas, what the hell,” Dean scolded. He held onto both of Cas’s arms and stared him in the eyes. They both were panting hard from the emotional tidal wave they’d just surfed. “What’s gotten into you? You need to calm the fuck down”

“Sam was being insensitive,” Cas spoke. He broke out of Dean’s hold and turned away from Dean in anger.

Dean was feeling his own wave of anger rising and shaking in his chest. He really didn’t like Cas shoving him off like that so he grabbed his shoulder and spun him around to face him.

“Sam has our best interest in mind, he’s not being insensitive, he’s looking at this from all sides,” Dean bit out.

Cas looked away again. His jaw was set in a hard line and he swallowed thickly. It wasn’t like Cas to act like this and Dean knew it was the effects of the Bond messing with him. His emotions had been haywire too but he couldn’t let himself fly off the handle like that.

“What is it Cas, what’s wrong?”

Cas finally met his gaze. He had a hard look on his face like he was fighting letting what he was really feeling show through. Dean could see it though, in his eyes. His throat bobbed and he wavered just slightly.

“It’s my fault we’re Bonded.”

Dean felt the pain of his words flood through his body. It wasn’t just his pain, it was Castiel’s too.

“If I had been more responsible… If I had never asked for your help again after the first time… like you originally asked me to…,” Cas trailed off.

Dean sucked in a breath as Cas looked away and swallowed thickly. Cas’s cheeks flexed as he collected himself. _Fuck_. Dean had originally said not to mention it to anyone and he tried to convince both himself and the angel that it was a one-time thing.

“If we break the Bond and it ruins your mind, you’d never be a hunter again. If we break the Bond and you die…”

Dean’s throat felt like it was closing up. Castiel’s pain was harder and harder to swallow down, he could taste it. He felt heat rolling down his cheeks and wanted to punch himself in the face for crying. He needed to be strong. He quickly wiped them away.

“You are too important to this world Dean. You are too important to me. I want to keep the Bond for your safety. I can’t be responsible for putting you through that much pain, I…I love you too much…”

Castiel said the words so easily and it scared Dean to death. His heart was slamming against his chest and he moved forward to pull Cas into a hug. He held the back of his head with his hand and rested his chin on Cas’s shoulder. Cas gave in easily, quickly wrapping his arms around Dean and holding him tightly.

“Shh, I know you do. I…,” Dean faltered. His throat dried up and he couldn’t force the word no matter how much he tried. He wanted to say it but he couldn’t. He just couldn’t. “It’s okay.”

Everything was at stake here and Dean didn’t know which option was better. He’d felt first-hand how bad it was to just feel the Bond ripping. It was some of the worst pain he’d ever felt. If they lived through something that traumatic they’d probably never want to see each other again. He couldn’t lose Cas forever…

Dean pulled back to look Cas in the eyes. He needed him in his life, Castiel was his foundation. Always there since the day he pulled him out of Hell. Dean leaned forward and pressed his lips to Castiel’s.  He was terrified of being in love and he couldn’t say it out loud whether he was or not, but he hoped Cas understood. After a few moments he pulled away from the angel.

“Come on,” he said as he walked back into the other room. Cas hovered in the doorway awkwardly while Dean helped pick up the rest of the books.

“I apologize for my outburst,” Cas said quietly. He snapped his fingers and everything that had been previously destroyed returned to how it was before he had broken it.

After the surprise of the table being magically fixed wore off, Sam spoke, “I didn’t mean to upset you Cas. I just think that breaking the Bond is what’s best. It’s risky, I know… but do you and Dean really think that you can survive the trials?”

Dean felt a small wave of anger flow through him but he glanced at Cas and the angel nodded.

“This isn’t just about Dean, Sam,” Bobby said. “Cas could lose his mind or die just as easily… Would it be worth it to lose them both?”

“We’re not breaking the Bond,” Dean finally spoke. All eyes shifted to look at him and Castiel’s heart soared.  “When we were in Heaven they purposefully kept us apart and the strain on our Bond was some of the worst pain I’ve ever felt.”

Sam stared at his brother with an open mouth. “Dean, you can’t be serious,” he said.

“I am.”

“Oh and what? Now it’s suddenly decided? The trials are designed for _angels_ , you’re a human being!”

“I know that, Sammy.”

“Then why do you think that you can handle the trials? You might be physically unable to do a task. At least if we broke the Bond here we’d be in more control.”

“Look, Sam, Cas doesn’t want to break the Bond,” he trailed off for a moment before taking a deep breath. “And neither do I. The pain is not something we can stop. It’s there but you can’t actually touch it. It’s like you’re being ripped from the inside out. I don’t think a spell could stop that.”

Sam stared at him completely flabbergasted. 

“We can use the Bond to our advantage, having Cas around makes us a stronger team.”

Sam blinked a few times like he was trying to calm himself down before he went off on an ignorant fool ranting about something he didn’t understand.

“But what about all those times when Cas isn’t around? When he’s pulled away by work from Heaven or who knows what else? Then what? It’s easy to promise you’ll always be together but what if you can’t get to each other? Then what? You go into shock while we’re on a case? You start screaming in invisible pain in the middle of a hunt?”

Dean clenched his jaw, his brother was making a lot of good points.

“I will always choose Dean over Heaven,” Cas stated in a matter-of-fact tone. Sam shot him an angry look but Cas did not flinch.

“Okay, so you two are always together, but I doubt Heaven would be thrilled with you two being Bonded. They might never back down. Them hunting us could become ten times as bad! You two being Bonded puts a target on both of your backs.”

“Sam, let it go. The decision is made.”

Sam stared at his brother in shock. He gave a humorless chuckle before standing up. “You know what, fine. I’m done trying to help you.”

With that, he left the kitchen and stormed upstairs. Dean sighed heavily and pressed his fingers into his eye sockets in hopes of easing the headache in his skull.

“What do you think Bobby?”

“It’s a tough corner you got yourselves in, but I’d rather have you two knuckleheads together than insane or dead.”

Dean smiled to himself, having Bobby of all people approve of him and Cas… it meant a lot. Dean was about to say something when a loud bang radiated through the house. The sudden loud sound caused the men to jump in fright. At first, Dean thought it was Sam throwing even more of a tantrum but then glass shattered in another room. Dean watched a brick slide across the floor.

What the hell? Were some kid outside throwing shit?

There was wind suddenly picking up, blowing hard against Bobby’s house and making it creak. It howled and it was so strong that it sent items flying in the room where the window had just broken.

Sam quickly came hammering back down the steps. He had a deer-in-the-headlights kind of look on his face.

“We’ve got company.”

Dean made it to a window and looked outside. Angels stood about one hundred yards away surrounding the entire house in a perfect circle.

“Come out,” One of them shouted.

“You can’t run anymore!”

“This ends now!”

Dean looked to Sam with frantic eyes. Now, what were they going to do? They were surrounded with no way out.

“Damnit,” Sam cursed, “I thought we’d have more time than this.” Sam had to shout to be heard over the wind whipping wildly outside.

“They know you boys are close to me… we should’a moved when we had the chance,” Bobby said.

More and more objects were thrown against the house, and the shouting outside was only getting louder.

“I guess this is it, we have to request the trials,” Dean said to Cas.

“We don’t even know if that will work! If God destroyed the Earth with water for angels mating with humans,” Sam argued, trailing off toward the end.

“Look, man, God left. This is the best chance we got.”

Another window shattered and loose papers flew across the house, hitting Dean and the others in the process. As much as he didn’t want to, Sam nodded. They had to try something and staying inside and letting the wind rip Bobby’s house apart, was not it. They barreled towards the door and fought to yank it open against the wind.

When it finally opened the four were able to approach the angels surrounding them. There were some familiar faces in the crowd. Gabriel… Balthazar… even Hannah. It was strange for Cas to see his brothers standing so blatantly against him.

Cas eyes met with his brother Gabriel, he had put then through so much with his relentless tricks but Cas still felt closer to him than some other faces in the crowd. Gabriel gave him a classic smile.

“Hey bro,” he said. “I guess I just wanted to see if it was true.”

Cas looked at Dean for a moment before meeting Gabriel’s gaze again. “It’s true.”

Gabriel’s expression changed, he pushed his lips together hard before nodding… then he shook his head as if conflicted. “Why?”

The question hit Cas right in the chest before he could speak the leader of this whole ordeal started shouting.

Dean immediately recognized him as the same asshole that had stabbed him as he and Castiel fell toward the Earth. His hands automatically clenched into fists just seeing his face.

“This is the end, Dean Winchester,” he said with a nasty grin. “Either break this disgusting Bond… or face death.”

A hand slapped against Dean’s shoulder and yanked him backward. It was Cas, he quickly stepped in front of Dean protectively.

“Castiel, stand down,” Someone shouted from the side.

The cloaking sigils that Sam had put up upon his arrival made it so the angels couldn’t step any closer. It was like a force field in a perfect circle around Bobby’s house.

“Castiel, you traitor!”

“Enough,” The asshole angel said, throwing a hand in the air. “What is your choice, Dean?”

Cas glanced over his shoulder at Dean and then he briefly met both Sam and Bobby’s eyes. Dean’s heart thudded loudly in his chest. He was really about to do this, this was really about to happen.

There was no turning back now…

Dean nodded at Cas and took a deep breath.

“Cas and I… Well, we decided we aren’t breaking the Bond.”

Several of the angels gasped and began shouting their dissatisfaction loudly. The asshole raised a hand again, when the crowd fell silent he was laughing. It was a chilling, humorless sound.

“Then you choose death,” he stated.

Dean smiled, “No. We choose the trials.”


	18. Chapter 18

Shock spread through the angels like a wave. They all seemed to be blinking slowly with open mouths. For the first time, all was silent, even the wind had slowed to a stop. It was like watching the words visibly sink into their brains.

“How dare you request the trials,” an angel burst out and just like that a new wave spread through the crowd, this time it was anger. The voices of the angels grew to the point of being unintelligible as they all shouted at once.

Cas looked at the crowd with a sinking feeling. These were his brothers and sisters… his eyes locked with Gabriel. He had a petrified look on his face and he was shaking his head no frantically. He couldn’t hear his voice, but he could tell that he was shouting “Cas, no! No!” The sinking feeling in Cas’s stomach turned to dread.

Through all the yelling and screaming, Cas picked up on something out of place. It was laughter. It was Zachariel, he was the one who Dean referred to as “asshole.”

“Enough,” he shouted, once again silencing the crowd. His laughter had stopped but he still wore a sick smile.

“The Trials of the Nine Choirs are for angels, you are aware that you’re a human being… right?”

Ooh, this guy was a great big bag of dicks.

“The Trials are for two different types of beings who want to prove they can handle their Bond,” Dean countered.

“You’ll die in the trials,” Zachariel seethed. His smile was long gone. “If you both are so desperate to die then…” Zachariel stopped mid-sentence and suddenly that wicked smile was sliding back onto his face. “Then why not make it interesting,” he mused. He seemed like he was talking more to himself than anyone else. He chuckled in a sick glee. “Fine,” he spoke, “You two will be faced with the trials.”

Dean wasn’t sure if he should be relieved or scared shitless.

The angels seemed to have split reactions. Some seemed to like the idea of Dean and Cas being put through the Trials while others seemed infuriated by the idea.

“It has been decided,” Zachariel shouted, somehow his voice boomed louder than the rest. “I hope you two are ready,” he sneered. “The trials will take place in Heaven.”

He pressed the tips of his fingers together, “Remove the blocking sigil so we can begin.”

Begin?! Right now?!

Dean’s hands clenched into fists. He wanted to do the trials but not right this second. He had hoped they’d have a day to mentally prepare.

Sam suddenly grabbed Dean and turned him to face him. “Dean,” he said, “You don’t have to do this.”

Sam had a desperate look in his eye.

“I have to,” Dean said. “We’ve got no other choice.”

"No, Dean, please… Maybe we can find a spell and break the Bond painlessly.”

“Remove the sigil, boys,” Zachariel practically sang

“Dean, you two can stay together! We just need to break the Bond,” his brother kept trying.

“No Sam, you’ve heard them. Bonded or not, humans and angels aren’t allowed to… mate. They won’t stop.”

“I’m not going to wait all day,” Zachariel was saying. He glared at Dean as he spoke, “Make a decision!”

“Sam, break the sigil,” Dean said, he looked his brother dead in the eye.

“Dean, please, don’t do this,” Sam pleaded.

“Thirty seconds,” Zachariel called out. Man, he was really living up to his asshole title.

“Sam, break the sigil,” Dean yelled roughly.

“Dean!”

“Sam! Do it,” Dean finally demanded.

Sam started at his brother for a split-second looking shocked and defeated. Dean would not change his mind, he couldn’t. Sam finally turned and ran toward Bobby’s house, his long legs carrying him quickly across the lawn.

He disappeared into the housed for a few seconds. The moment Sam’s head popped out of the doorframe the angels ambushed them. Instinctively Dean fought back but so many angels had grabbed him at once that he could hardly move. He looked to the side to see that Cas, his brother, and Bobby were all swarmed with angels as well.

He opened his mouth to call out to Cas or his brother, but two fingers pressed against his head and everything went dark.

* * *

Castiel slowly ebbed into consciousness. His body was being shaken side to side like an earthquake and he kept hearing a sound.

“Cas… Cas…”

Oh, that was his name. The voice was calling to him. Everything was crashing down on him at once. Feelings, sounds, he could even see the light of the room behind his eyelids.

“Cas, wake up,” That wasn’t a voice he had expected. It sounded like…

Castiel’s eyes popped open, it took them a few moments but when they focused he realized he was looking at his brother Gabriel.

“Gabriel,” Cas spoke. His mind seemed to be catching up with him. Once it did, he realized just how strange it was for him to be looking up at Gabriel. He squinted in confusion. Before he could ask what was going on Gabriel spoke.

“Cas, come with me.”

“Dean,” was all Cas could say. He needed to make sure he was okay.

Gabriel stepped backward and Cas leaned up into a sitting position. He followed Gabriel’s outstretched hand to find Dean laying on a nearby bed.

“He’s here, he’s fine, come on,” Gabriel insisted.

Cas stood up and checked Dean for himself. Once he was satisfied that he was okay he followed his brother out into the hallway. Gabriel seemed to look around a bit before finally turning to face Castiel.

“Cas,” he said, “You have to stop this.”

Cas squinted at his brother and tilted his head in confusion.

“This has gone too far, you can’t enter the trials.”

“Why not,” Cas questioned.

“Are you insane? Don’t you remember what happened to Jophiel? You don’t need to come out of the Trials mangled and babbling incoherently.”

“His mate was killed,” Cas said. He was going to say more. Explain that he’d protect Dean no matter what, but Gabriel spoke first.

“What makes you think the same thing won’t happen to you?”

This struck Cas. Had he been naïve in thinking that it would be different for him and Dean? That they were… invincible? Dean was only a human…

“I get that you will protect him but… who’s going to protect you?”

Cas felt a jolt of anger. Dean would protect him, just like he would protect Dean. And how was he to know if this wasn’t a trial right now. Maybe they had sent Gabriel to try to make him give up.

“We will not break the Bond. Our relationship will never be accepted, but Dean and I will face the trials and fight to keep our Bond intact.”

Gabriel stared at Cas for a long time. His eyes seemed like they were trying to decode something.

“You really love him don’t you,” Gabriel asked.

Why was this such a strange concept for everyone to wrap their minds around? Cas had loved Dean for as long as he remembered, from the moment he laid a hand on him in Hell.

“Yes.”

Gabriel swayed a little on his feet before stepping a little closer to Cas. “These trials are designed to be absolutely brutal Cas, you and Dean are going to be tested in ways you never even thought possible.  Whatever you do… don’t forfeit.” Cas listened carefully as his brother spoke.

“Tell Dean the same thing. Zachariel will not go easy on you, but no matter how much pain they put you through, forfeiting will be worse.” Castiel nodded. His body was tensing up, this all was becoming so real so quickly.

Castiel looked to the door of the room he had woken up in. Dean was in there, resting blissfully unaware of the dangers to come.

“You’re going to have to help Dean whenever you can, he’s not an angel so he’s already at a huge disadvantage.”

Gabriel smiled at his brother a little. “This is going to be hard, but you can do this Cas.”

“Thank you, Gabriel,” Cas said. He returned his brother's smile. It meant a lot to Cas that Gabriel wasn’t so against him after all.

“Don’t tell anyone I talked to you, I’d probably be executed at this point,” Gabriel said. Castiel doubted it but he wasn’t totally sure. Gabriel turned as if he were going to leave before spinning back around.

“Oh and one more thing, “ he said before laying a hand on his brother's arm. Warmth suddenly spread throughout Castiel’s body. He felt his wings spreading out and the bandages falling away. The stitches that Dean had worked so hard on melted into new skin, healing his wound completely. 

Castiel gasped when he was able to move his wings again without pain. He was healed.

“If you’re really going to do this…. You need to be at full power.”

Gabriel turned away again, this time truly walking away. “I think you’re stupid… but I’m rooting for you.” With that Gabriel flew away.

Cas walked back toward the room where Dean was resting. His thoughts were plaguing him with Gabriel’s words. _No matter how much pain you’re in… don’t forfeit… it’ll be worse._

What if doing the trials wasn’t the right choice at all? Maybe it would be more of a risk to go through them. Maybe that’s what Sam was trying to tell them all along.

Cas was a few steps away from the door when it suddenly flew open. “Cas,” Dean said in relief. “I was worried we were separated buddy, I’m so glad-” Dean stopped mid-sentence when Cas gently collided into his chest. The angel made no move to actually hug him, it was more like he was leaning against Dean for support.

Dean blinked a few times in confusion before wrapping his arms around Cas, “What happened,” he asked.

“Gabriel came to see me, warning me…” Cas said. He leaned against Dean for a long time before stepping away and breaking the hug. “Everyone seems to think we are making the wrong choice.”

Dean could feel Castiel’s sadness weighing on his chest. Dean stepped out of the doorway and allowed Cas to enter their shared room once more. Cas went straight for one of the beds and sat down.

“What if this is the wrong choice, what if by doing this… I’m putting you in more danger than us just breaking the Bond?”

Dean sat down beside Cas. “Cas this isn’t just your choice.  We decided together that we would do the trials. It’s not gonna be easy…. But we can get through it.”

Dean bumped his shoulder against Cas’s, trying to lighten the mood. “If we don’t make it at least we can say we died trying.”

Cas’s mood didn’t seem to lift.

“Do you have any idea what some of the trials could be,” Dean asked after a bit of silence.

Cas just shook his head. “I remember viewing the trials, but I was so young at the time. I don’t remember much about them.”

Dean hummed lightly as he nodded.

“Gabriel healed my wings,” Cas suddenly blurted out. He felt like it was a fact Dean should know. Then he turned to meet the hunter's green eyes.

“That’s awesome, but… how,” Dean asked.

“He is an Archangel,” Cas said. “We can’t heal our own wings and technically we’re not supposed to heal others but… in certain situations an angel from a higher choir can heal your wings for you.”

The men fell into silence again, but Cas never looked away from Dean. He wanted to say something… anything that might make this a little better. He wanted to touch Dean and be touched by Dean.  He wanted to forget for a little while. Dean’s face turned toward him and Cas realized how hard he was leaning against Dean. Dean breathed slowly and didn’t seem to mind the angel leaning on him. He didn’t say a word, but he still felt desire taking flame between them.

Before either of them could do anything angels burst through the doorway grabbing both of them and yanking them to their feet.

“Hope you two are ready,” one of the angels sneered. He grabbed Dean’s arm and shoved it back behind him so hard that Dean actually made a sound of pain. With a shove, the two were forced out of their room and dragged down a long hallway. It felt like they were being dragged for miles, and all the hallways looked the same. White and endless…

This was really happening.

They finally came to a set of large doors. They seemed to reach up towards the skies, and it was hard to tell if they ended or just went on forever. Then the gigantic doors began to open and Dean and Cas were thrown into the room like trash into a dumpster. 

Using his wings, Cas was able to catch Dean before he hit the ground. Cas leaned into him to ask Dean if he was alright when an enormous image of Zachariel appeared above them.

As both men looked up they realized that they were in a giant stadium. It looked like something right out of Rome, except everything was a crisp white. Everything except the endless amounts of angels that were filling the seats.

“Welcome to the Trials of the Nine Choirs,” Zachariel’s voiced boomed so loudly that Dean had to cover his ears. The crowd cheered.

“This will be the first time in thousands of years that the trials have been held.”

Cas had to place a hand on Dean’s shoulder. He used his angel grace to create a shield for Dean’s ears so that the volume of Zachariel’s voice didn’t burst his eardrums.

“The Trials of the Nine Choirs are designed to test those who wish to be Bonded despite their differences in choir, or… in this case, species.”

Dean’s heart was pounding in his neck, making it difficult to swallow. This was all about to start and he really didn’t have any idea what he was about to get himself into. Dean swallowed a bit of his pride and reached out to take Cas’s hand in his. The angel looked at him but Dean did not return his gaze, instead, he squeezed lightly.

Just having Cas’s hand in his made him feel stronger, calmer…. He held his head up high.

“Castiel and Dean Winchester have decided to take on the challenge. They will be faced with nine different trials designed to push them to their limits. In order to succeed, they must rely on their Bond.”

He paused for a moment, “In some trials, if they fail they will be forced to restart the task from the beginning. In others, failure could mean death. They will continue the trials until they win, die or… until they forfeit.”

Dean and Cas shared a quick glance. Dean didn’t even know forfeiting was an option.

“Forfeiting will result in their Bond breaking instantly.”

And just like that forfeiting was no longer an option.

“Lastly, this year will be a little different than the past trials, this year if I decide to interfere or change a rule… Well, I will.”

Dean’s mouth dropped open at that. The angels were cheering the asshole on. That bastard! He was going to sabotage them just because he could.

“Our first trial is brought to us by the Principalities. As you all know they specialize in politics and military matters. They will be using this special skill set for their task,” Zachariel turned his attention away from the crowd and looked down toward Cas and Dean. “In this trial, you will be challenged to see what the other is feeling.”

Dean and Cas shared another look, that didn’t sound too hard. Dean could usually look at Cas and tell what he was feeling. It went beyond that too, especially with how things had been recently. Dean knew Castiel’s outburst was coming when he knocked the table to the ground at Bobby’s and when he explained how the Bond was his fault afterward, Castiel’s pain in his chest was so overwhelming that it brought Dean to tears.

“The task… will now begin.”

The crowd burst out into cheers and for a moment everything went black. Castiel’s hand in his suddenly disappeared.

“Cas,” Dean automatically called out, he turned but he could not see anything in this thick darkness. There was no response. Dean tried moving again, but this time he found that he couldn’t.

The light came back on and Cas was nowhere to be seen. Dean found that he was strapped into a chair. His legs, arms and even his head were tightly held in place. He had thick, leather straps bound tightly around his limbs, he couldn’t even move his head from side to side! All he could do was move his eyes. He felt like a psychotic patient in a mental hospital.

That wasn’t all, everything looked completely different. The stadium was gone and now he was just in a room. He strained hard against the chair but no matter how much he tried he couldn’t move.

The door to the room slid open and an angel stepped inside carrying a clipboard. She was petite with blonde hair that was pulled back into a neat ponytail. She wore a tight top and matching pencil skirt and she even had on a pair of thick glasses. She looked like a stereotype come to life.

“What’s going on,” Dean demanded as soon as he saw her. He tried to sound tough, but how tough could he be when he couldn’t move? “Let me out of this damn chair!”

The blonde completely ignored him and sat down in a nearby seat.

“Castiel is being tested in another room. Explain to me what he is feeling, once you feel it.”

Her voice was completely deadpan.  Dean stared at her like she had three heads. How was he supposed to know what Cas was feeling when he wasn’t even in the same room as him and how was he supposed to know that this wasn’t some kind of trick?

As much as he tried asking, the angel did not answer any of his questions, she just kept repeating what she had originally said over and over. Despite what the angel was telling him Dean decided that he had to find a way out of this chair and get to Cas.

* * *

“The task… will now begin.”

Zachariel’s voice echoed throughout the stadium before a wave of applause broke out. Dean’s hand squeezed against Castiel’s. Cas couldn’t believe that the trials were going to start so suddenly, he was almost sure that they should’ve been given time to prepare.  Maybe not though, he couldn’t actually remember any past trials.

Everything suddenly went dark and Cas wasn’t sure how, but somehow he lost Dean’s hand. One second Dean was squeezing him lightly, lacing their fingers together and the next he was just… gone. Castiel immediately panicked and started reaching out for Dean in the dark.

The next thing he knew, Cas was grabbed by a brute force. His trench coat and dress coat were yanked off of him, leaving him in just his button up and slacks. Cas fought against the force holding him but nothing seemed to work, instead it shoved him to the ground. Shortly after a cool metal tightened against each wrist. Handcuffs…

The force let up but Castiel couldn’t really move. It felt like every ounce of his strength was suddenly draining away. That sigil from before… when they tortured him in Heaven.  It must have been the same thing.

When the lights snapped back on Castiel found Zachariel and two other angels in the room. It made Cas’s stomach drop, this was becoming more and more like when he was held captive in Heaven not too long ago.

Zachariel had a wicked smile on his face. He flicked his fingers toward Cas and the two angels on either side of him moved forward, grabbed Cas and hauled him to his feet. Castiel couldn’t even fight against them; he was like a rag doll being tossed about.

There was a hook that hung from the ceiling above Castiel’s head. The angels lifted Cas’s wrists and hung the handcuffs from it. Cas couldn’t use his muscles, he was only upright because of the hook, but thankfully his feet were on the floor beneath him.

After he was hooked upright Zachariel spoke to the two angels. “Thank you for your assistance, you may leave.” The two angels nodded and began to walk out the door. Before the second angel could step through the threshold Zachariel spoke again, “Oh,” he said. “And send him in.” With another nod, the angel ducked out of the room.  Zachariel chuckled to himself lightly and began to pace back and forth in front of Castiel. All Cas could do was glare at him, following his pace with his blue eyes. “Let’s see just how well you and Dean are connected.”

Cas felt his heart rate increasing. He had a feeling that this would not be enjoyable, but he was more worried about how his pain would affect Dean. Whatever it was, he could handle it. Just as Cas was going to say something to Zachariel the door to the room opened. Dean stood in the doorway.

Castiel’s heart rose at the sight of him, maybe this wouldn’t be so bad after all. Dean looked to Zachariel with a confused look on his face. Zachariel nodded and said, “Go ahead.”

Dean stepped into the room and made his way closer to Cas, placing his hands on his hips. Zachariel was watching them closely and Dean was looking over his shoulder at the Archangel. “Like you mean it, Dean,” Zachariel instructed. Cas squinted up at Dean in front of him.

What was going on? This was all so strange. 

“Dean,” Cas questioned. Dean met his gaze and gave him a gentle smile. It made Cas feel calmer but something was still off. Something just wasn’t right but Cas couldn’t figure out what it was. He opened his mouth to speak, to ask Dean what was happening but he was cut off when Dean suddenly leaned forward and lightly pressed his lips to Cas’s. 

He felt different than normal. Like his lips moved in a different way than Cas was used to. Castiel gasped and pulled back as much as he could with the sigil restraining him. He looked at Zachariel who was smiling at him before looking up at Dean.

“What are you doing,” Cas finally asked. Dean stepped more in front of Cas, leaning him back and making it impossible for him to see Zachariel. “This is all part of the trial, just ignore him,” Dean said. Cas looked up at him with open-mouthed confusion but he trusted Dean. Within moments Dean was pulling Cas close and kissing him deeply like he meant it. Cas strained against the hook his cuffs were attached to. He wanted to wrap his arms around Dean, he wanted more of his touch.

Dean’s body was pressed right against his and he seemed to be getting more and more into it and Cas’s heart thumped against his chest. His head was rushing and he liked the way Dean’s lips felt on his, but there was something missing in his kiss. Maybe he was holding back because of Zachariel?

Dean pulled back a little and smirked down at Cas. He slid his hand down and started to rub against Castiel’s groin. Tingles shot down his spine making his dick awaken and Cas shivered but he still felt cold. The heat that normally burned through his body whenever Dean touched him wasn’t there.

Cas closed his eyes as Dean started to nip against his neck. How was this a trial and why didn’t it feel good to have Dean touch him like it normally did? Had Zachariel done something to their Bond? Was the trial to see how Cas reacted to having his connection with Dean removed? That didn’t make sense, that didn’t have anything to do with what they had said when they were still in the stadium.

* * *

Over and over again the angel would ask him, “What Is Castiel experiencing,” and Dean had no idea what to say. He couldn’t feel anything! Was he supposed to be or was she trying to trick him?

Dean couldn’t help but be annoyed. He felt like he was failing the trial, just sitting here waiting for something to happen. He was starting to feel a little out of breath and he shifted in his seat. Then Dean seemed to realize it. Pleasure, very faint, dancing along his skin.

He gasped a lightly because… they wouldn’t! This had to be a trick for sure, but the feelings were growing. Dean’s spine straightened and he felt like something was just lightly rubbing over his dick. It was barely there, but still undeniable. Dean’s eyes widened, unsure of what he was feeling. Despite how hard he strained against the chair or squeezed his eyes shut he couldn’t block the feeling.

“What are you doing to him,” Dean demanded through clenched teeth, breathing a bit heavier than normal.  He felt furious, this wasn’t his pleasure, it was Cas’s. Somewhere, someone was touching Cas and exciting him, making pleasure fill his body. Dean’s hands balled into fists.

“What is Castiel experiencing,” The blonde asked again. She leaned forward to watch Dean closely.

Dean didn’t want to answer. He was getting excited from something he couldn’t even see, it was humiliating! He hated the idea that someone else was touching Castiel like this, it was disgusting. The longer he waited the more he felt. He needed to make this stop.

“What is Castiel experiencing,” The blonde repeated one again and Dean wanted to rip her face off. She tapped her pen against her clipboard.

“Pleasure,” Dean said through clenched teeth. “Now stop, stop touching him like that.”

The angel scribbled something down on her clipboard.

Dean was so relieved when the pleasure stopped, he let out a heavy breath. Then it washed over him. It was so strong… betrayal. It was vile and hard to swallow. Dean’s eyes widened. He heard Cas call his name, it echoed in his mind.

“Cas,” Dean called out.

The blonde angel watched Dean closely and just as she was about to ask him the same question as before pain erupted through Dean’s body. He went rigid, and his body jerked like he’d been shot. He screamed.

* * *

Dean pulled back from Cas and smiled at him. It took a moment for Cas to come to his senses but when he did he just felt confused. He looked up at Dean in front of him.

“What’s the matter Castiel, don’t you like it,” Dean asked. Castiel took a step backward. Castiel? He had said Castiel.  Dean hardly ever called Castiel by his full name, it was almost always Cas. This person in front of him… this was not Dean.

“You’re not Dean,” Cas said with certainty.

“Ha,” The man in front of him laughed, “Took you long enough to notice. Some Bond you two must have.”

“Who are you?”

Dean’s face seemed to melt away, leaving a random angel in his place. He looked nothing like Dean! Castiel felt disgusted with himself, he had just made out with someone else and he really believed that it was Dean, he’d wanted it to be Dean so badly…

The angel who he had kissed looked over his shoulder and Cas caught sight of Zachariel nodding... With that, the angel spun around with a wicked smile and sank a knife into Cas’s side.

Cas gasped out at the feeling, before looking down at the knife sticking out of him. Red was growing around the blade, staining his shirt and seeping down his leg. After the initial shock wore off that’s when Castiel got slammed with the pain. It knocked the air right out of him.

Castiel bared his teeth and glared at the angel before him. The angel stepped close to him, his hand wrapped around the handle of the knife. He leaned close to Cas’s face.

“Want another kiss?”

“Bite me,” Cas replied with a grimace.

It was difficult to breathe because the natural movement of his stomach rising and falling caused so much pain. The sigil kept his energy zapped, he could do nothing to protect himself. So when the angel reached forward and a shoved the knife deeper, Cas couldn’t stop him. He twisted the blade and Cas began to yell out against the pain. He wanted to beg. Plead for the angel to stop… but he wouldn’t allow the angel and Zachariel that pleasure.  Zachariel stepped closer to the angel stabbing Cas.

“I don’t think he’s had enough,” he said with a nasty grin. He placed his hand on Cas’s chest and within seconds Castiel’s body was convulsing with electric shocks. They rolled through his body and he shook violently as they pulsed through him. He couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe. All he could do was feel the pain tearing through his body. His senses were completely overwhelmed, he had to get out of this!

The pain grew to the point of being too much and Castiel’s vision went black.

* * *

Dean could hear the angel asking him that question over and over with her deadpan voice but he could not respond. His body was trembling like he was the one receiving the electrocution directly. His jaw was locked and he was sure that he would not live through this. It was just too much for his body to handle. The pain just kept growing until Dean couldn’t take anymore and he passed out.

It was only for a split second though because as soon as he did the electric shocks stopped. He opened his eyes but everything was blurry, like he was seeing through a haze. He couldn’t feel anything… Things didn’t make sense anymore. Things seemed to move on their own and his arms were up above his head and he was looking down at Cas’s shoes.

_Cas’s shoes._

Dean lifted his head to look at the angels who were talking to him. They were calling him Castiel and laughing at his pain. Their faces seemed to swirl around the room. If Dean didn’t feel like he was on the brink of death he’d think this was a hell of a drug he was on.

Dean dropped his head back down and looked down at his side where a constant twinge of pain was filling him. Sure enough, a knife was nestled into his skin. He was wearing a blood stained button up and black dress pants.

 _‘I’m in Cas’s body…’_ Dean thought. It had to be similar as to when he looked through Cas’s eyes in Heaven the first time but somehow he seemed to have control over Cas’s body this time. He had no idea how he just knew.

He was gaining strength in his legs and was able to stand more than he was hanging from the hook above. The pain in his side was almost unbearable, but Dean’s body was running more on adrenaline than anything else. He got more and more feeling back and started to try to focus. 

“I guess since you’re awake you’re ready for some more,” An angel that Dean didn’t recognize asked. He stepped closer, reaching for the handle of the blade, but Dean was faster. He moved backward and when the angel was off balance in front of him he lifted his leg and kicked him as hard as he could.

He doubled over in pain and cried out. Dean smiled at him before he looked up at Zachariel whose dull green eyes grew to the size of dinner plates. Then everything went black.

* * *

Cas knew that he had passed out, but to him, it seemed that his eyes opened right away. He found himself strapped down to a chair and it was so confusing to him that it had him questioning how long he’d actually been passed out? An angel was standing very close to him, examining him.

“What is going on,” Cas asked, but he did not hear his own voice. Instead, he heard Dean. His eyes widened in surprise.  He looked down at his lap. He saw a plaid button up and dark jeans….

These straps were nothing for Castiel’s strength. Suddenly anger burned through his entire being, he needed to hunt Zachariel down and find Dean. He was so heated that his eyes began to glow. As he stood up the restraints snapped like twigs. The angel who had been in front of him scrambled backward and fell. She stared up at him in disbelief. 

The brighter that Castiel’s anger burned the stronger he felt and he spread his wings out behind him ready to fight.

“Where is Dean,” he demanded. His voice boomed throughout the room, reverberating off the walls.

He took a step toward the blonde angel staring up at him in fear but before he could do anything the lights went out.

* * *

“What the hell just happened,” Zachariel demanded as he landed.

He had flown himself to the control room where the angels who were in charge of the trials all sat. They were all sitting in a large circle with computers and holograms that were showing the trials as they happened.

“We aren’t sure, sir,” one angel said, spinning to face Zachariel. “Something appeared to happen when both of them passed out. Take a look,” The angel said. He pulled up two videos, one of Cas and one of Dean. He played them side by side and Zachariel watched over the angel's shoulder.

“Zach,” another angel said, making her way over to him. “Zach, I think I know what happened.”

Zachariel spun around in an instant and slapped the brown-headed angel speaking to him. He hit her so hard that she fell to the floor, cupping her cheek in shock.

“Don’t shorten my name you insulant fool. You will show me respect and use my full name.”

Zachariel stepped back to the angel who was replaying recordings of the events.

“There’s no way that Castiel should have been able to kick Simiel like that. The sigil was still intact.”

Then the angel pointed to a separate screen where it played an image of Dean, they watched it together before their mouths dropped in shock.

There was Dean Winchester, standing up from his restraints like it was nothing and glowing a bright white with two wings spread out behind him. His eyes glowed a fierce, fiery green and his light was almost blinding.

“How can this be?! He is but a mere human,” Zachariel shouted in surprise.

The girl who had been smacked down spoke up once again, “Zachariel,” She said, making sure to say his full name with emphasis on each syllable, “I believe that Dean Winchester and Castiel somehow switched bodies.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Geez, got enough line breaks?


	19. Chapter 19

Zachariel stared at the brunette in unfocused horror. His eyes were wide and his mouth was open but he did not speak. _‘_ _I believe that Dean Winchester and Castiel somehow switched bodies.’_ That’s what she had said, but how could it be true?  All the angels in the room stared at Zachariel waiting for the Archangel to speak. 

“That’s… that’s not possible,” Zachariel muttered to himself. “They aren’t meant to switch bodies until the 5th and 6th trials… How could they… on their own?”

His eyebrows scrunched together as he began to run through the possibilities in his head. His eyes darted around wildly like he was reading invisible text in the air.

“That seems like the only explanation,” An angel spoke up. It was the same angel that had shown Zachariel the recordings from the trials just a few seconds ago.

There was a long, heavy silence. It was like Zachariel was frozen in time, he couldn’t figure this one out and it was like his brain was shutting down. Everyone was staring at him, everyone was expecting him to know how to fix this. Instead, Zachariel just stared at the floor.

“So, what do we do, sir? How do we proceed,” Another angel finally asked, their words finally broke the growing tension.

Zachariel seemed to snap out of it a little. “This should not have happened," Zachariel said to himself before looking up at the angels around him. His expression was rapidly changing from completely lost to furious. "Look into this, I want answers,” He snapped. Some of the angels nodded. “If you find out that they’re cheating somehow… tell me immediately.”

“And the trials,” the brunette asked.   
    
Zachariel looked a little lost at that one, “For now, we’ll stall for judging. That will give you all some time to research what happened.”   
  
“What if… we can’t find an answer?”   
    
Zachariel spun around to face the direction that the angel spoke to him from. “You _will_ find an answer,” he shouted before flying away.

* * *

 

The crowd was restless and looking at one another for answers that the other could not give. How was it that Dean suddenly broke free of his restraints? Why did he glow like an angel with wings spread behind him when he most certainly was not an angel of the Lord? How did Castiel suddenly regain strength and kick Simiel down? How had he suddenly become unfazed by the energy draining sigil? The handcuffs and the sigil were intact… It didn’t help that Dean and Cas hadn’t been seen since the trial ended. Were they even alive anymore? Were they even still in Heaven? It was all so bizarre, rumors were spreading like a bad disease. Maybe this was all a prank?   
    
Zachariel’s face suddenly appeared on the large screen in the center of the stadium. Silence instantly fell over the crowd as they awaited any kind of answer. For a long time he stared down at the ground with his mouth mashed into a hard line. It seemed to take hours for Zachariel to finally speak.   
    
“As you all know, the events of the previous trial were quite… unexpected," Zachariel spoke. The audience was practically holding its breath for more. Even in his frustration Zachariel had an air about him that kept the crowd hanging on his every word. "We will be taking a small recess to investigate and judge the two on their performances. Thank you for your patience. For now, you are all dismissed.”   
    
Then just as quickly as he had appeared on the screen, Zachariel was gone. The crowd burst out in boos and shouts of anger, but no matter how loudly they chided no further explanations would be given. 

* * *

Dean’s eyes slid open. The room was spinning violently and he felt like he had a hangover without all the fun of actually drinking the night before. He was laying on his back on the floor trying not to get sick. That’s when he realized that even though there were two empty beds in the room, whoever brought them back didn’t even bother to put them in a bed.   
  
It was probably Zachariel, that asshole…  
    
Dean slowly looked to his left and found Cas lying beside him. He appeared to be asleep. Luckily the violent spinning had stopped and Dean was able to sit up. Once he was up in a sitting position, images from the trials seemed to flash through his head and worry shot down Dean’s spine. His hands were at his side in an instant, patting against it to make sure it was okay. Not too long ago he was looking down at it only to find a blade buried deep.   
But that wasn’t his side that it was buried in… That was when he was Cas... Once the connection was made Dean practically

But that wasn’t his side that it was buried in… That was when he was Cas... Once the connection was made Dean practically leapt at the resting angel. He yanked his coat open and pulled his shirt untucked, pulling his shirt up until he could see skin. No wound.   
    
Dean sighed out in relief. The angels must have healed them after the trial. At least they could be bothered to do that since they couldn’t manage placing them in their beds.   
    
Castiel’s eyes fluttered open. “Dean,” he asked. His voice was a little raspy. He was squinting heavily and Dean wondered if he was going through the same spinning sensation as he did when he awoke.   
    
“Hey, buddy” Dean spoke, he nodded to Castiel’s clothes, “Sorry, I wanted to make sure you weren’t hurt.”   
    
Castiel sat up and examined himself as well. Then he looked up at Dean, “Are you injured?”   
    
“No,” Dean smiled, “I’m fine.”   
  
Cas stared at Dean in silence for a long time. Both men seemed to be thinking about the same thing… the last trial. Things had gone so strangely, it wasn’t anything like Dean had expected. And then, at the end…

"I think... I became you," Cas said. His eyebrows were knitted down in confusion. "Did we... Switch bodies," Cas asked.   
  
“I… think so. I remember seeing the knife in my side… but, it was your side… not mine.”

“How do you think this happened, Dean?”  
  
They ended up staring at each other for a long moment as if trying to figure it out.  
  
"Do you remember when you were tortured and I was walking all over Heaven trying to find you?"   
  
Castiel nodded.   
  
"You showed me where you were...  I saw through your eyes..."  
  
Castiel looked at Dean intently. It was hard for him to remember it though, he had been strung out on pain and on the brink of passing out when all of a sudden he felt like he was sharing his brain with Dean. At that point, he honestly thought he was hallucinating. Maybe he’d never know if he shared that vision with Dean on purpose or not.

"Do you think this was the same kind of thing," Dean asked.   
  
Castiel pressed his lips together.  He was about to answer when the door to their room burst open.  Both men jumped, their heads snapping to look at what caused the noise. Zachariel stepped inside their room and flicked his hand toward Dean and Cas. Both men were thrown backward and slammed against the back wall of their room. Dean’s vision blacked out for a second because his head slammed backward. His feet weren’t even on the ground anymore. Both he and Cas were plastered to the wall unable to move.   
    
“Alright, you two, how did you do it,” Zachariel demanded.  
  
Neither of them said anything, the shock of being thrown across the room into a wall hadn’t quite worn off yet. Instead, they struggled against the suffocating force that was pinning them to the wall.  
    
“Some kind of spell? Huh?!”

Zachariel stepped closer, looking up at the two men he had glued to the wall. His eyes were wide and bloodshot and he had a frantic, crazy look about him. His movements were jerky too, he looked like he’d completely lost his mind.

“I’ll kill you both if I find out that you’re cheating.”

“We are not cheating,” Castiel said. He strained against the invisible hold on him.

Zachariel turned his attention to Dean, “How did you do it? How did you switch bodies?!”

Again neither of them answered. They didn’t know how it happened… so what was there to say?

“ANSWER ME,” Zachariel shouted. He looked like he was about to go on a murder spree or something. His voice was so loud and sharp that both Cas and Dean flinched at the sound.

“We don’t know,” Dean shouted back.

Just like that Zachariel let the men drop to the floor. It hurt like hell when their unprepared bodies suddenly fell to the ground. Before Dean had a chance to react Zachariel grabbed Dean by the neck and shoved him against the wall. Dean kicked his feet and tried to pry the angel’s hands from his neck but he was too strong.

“We will find out, you hear me?! I’ll make sure you die, Dean Winchester! I swear it,” Zachariel said. His voice was eerily cheerful and as Dean looked at him he could see that there was no sanity in his eyes. He tried to shove him or kick him off. Dean was having a bit of trouble breathing, and the fire in Zachariel’s eyes was so strong that it scorched him with fear.

Castiel stood up from the floor and shoved Zachariel as hard as he could. Being that Zachariel was an Archangel he didn’t go very far. He stumbled and then spun around swinging at Castiel. Cas was able to dodge him.

“Keep it up,” Zachariel yelled crazily. He shoved Castiel backward. “I’ll make sure both of you die in the trials! I’ll kill you both myself!”

Zachariel turned and stared at Dean for a moment, his gaze was relentless. “I’ll destroy you Dean. I’ll make you watch me kill your precious Castiel, and then I’ll tear you limb from limb.” Dean stepped backward, away from Zachariel as he laughed. “The torture you felt in Hell will be nothing compared to what I’ll do to you.”

With that, Zachariel flew off.

“God, what a giant _prick_ ,” Dean shouted, he slammed his foot into the wall in blind anger. Dean was fuming, he’d give anything to bury an angel blade deep into Zachariel’s chest.

It took a while and a lot of pacing for Dean to calm down and for the room to stop buzzing with what had just happened. Finally, Dean stopped and pinched the bridge of his nose, sighing as he did.

That's about when Cas just couldn’t take it anymore. “Dean… I have been… unfaithful.”

Dean felt like a jolt of lightning had just struck him head on. Did he just hear that right? He looked to Castiel with eyes wide in pure horror.

“What,” Dean asked dumbly but Castiel was sure that the hunter had heard what he’d said. He walked toward Cas with a strange feeling brewing in his chest. Cas had cheated? With who? When?? Why…?

“I… I have been unfaithful,” Castiel repeated.

The words seemed to sink into Dean’s skull and anger lit in his chest. Dean felt like he couldn’t breathe like his brain wasn’t working correctly. He immediately thought back to Sam telling him about how Cas had asked him to kiss him. Had Sam lied when he said he hadn’t done it? And if they did kiss… why would Cas wait so long to say something about it?

“When,” was all Dean could think to ask. Castiel looked utterly ashamed of himself and Dean fought hard to remain calm.

“During the trial,” Cas whispered.

Dean sighed in relief and his heart lifted. This was about them feeling him up so that Dean would feel pleasure through Cas.

“God Cas, you scared the shit out of me,” Dean sighed. Castiel squinted at him with his head tilted in confusion.

“I know they touched you during the trial,” Dean said. “I had to tell them I was feeling it. That wasn’t cheating, they forced it on you.”

“Dean,” Castiel said, he stepped toward the hunter. “He looked like you, I knew it wasn’t… he was just different… but I wanted it to be you so badly that… I gave in.”

Dean felt his eyes widen at that. “Now I’m tainted everywhere he touched me.”

Castiel’s brow was furrowed and he looked a bit scared. He was staring at Dean. “I’m sorry,” Cas finally said dropping his head. “I can feel him on me and I hate it,” he whispered. Dean stepped toward the angel, unsure what to do. Castiel looked up at him with confusion coloring his face. “I want to feel your touch… not his.”

Dean sucked in a breath, feeling a little light-headed. He remembered how angry he was when he felt the secondhand pleasure from them touching Cas, so now he had to make it right, “Where did he touch you?”

“My hips,” Cas said and Dean put his hands on the angel’s hips. He pulled him closer until they were standing just a few inches from each other.

“He kissed me,” Cas said quietly. Dean felt another jolt of anger, someone else had been touching his Cas and he did not like it. Castiel’s blue eyes looked up to meet his.

Dean leaned forward and kissed Castiel lightly before pulling away. Castiel’s brow furrowed and his eyes stayed closed.

“No, Dean, he… he kissed me deeply,” Castiel said.

Dean pressed their lips together again and this time he licked against Cas’s bottom lip. Cas willingly opened his mouth to Dean’s tongue and they began to kiss deeply. Castiel placed a hand on the back of Dean’s neck, pulling him closer and brushing his fingers through Dean’s short hair.

Then, Cas pulled away. He was breathing a bit faster and his eyes were heavily lidded with lust. “Dean,” Cas murmured, “He… he rubbed me,” he said and Dean let his hand find its way to Cas’s groin. He rubbed against the angel and found a small amount of hardness there.

The heat that the men had grown so accustomed to, started to spread through their bodies. The more they kissed and touched the hotter they became.  Dean had just pulled away, lightly biting and licking at Cas’s neck when the sound of knocking filled the room. Dean turned and glared at the door.

“Dean, It’s Sam,” his brother called out from behind the door. Dean sighed dramatically and reluctantly stepped away from Cas. He stomped toward the door, tugging his clothing back into place.

Dean opened to door to find both Sam and Bobby waiting outside. Dean remembered when the angel’s had ambushed him, he saw them grab Sam and Bobby but he wasn’t sure if they actually brought them to Heaven or not. Maybe they were just holding them to keep them from getting in the way? He didn’t know. Despite his previous thoughts about being interrupted, Dean smiled at his brother.

“So, you want to tell me how you two did the switching act,” Sam said as he stepped through the door. Dean sighed. He and Cas sat on one bed and Sam and Bobby took a seat on the other.

“We don’t know how it happened… it just did,” Dean said. He was already tired of having this conversation over and over again. Sam seemed to pick up on his brother’s irritation and backpedaled a little.

“Bobby and I, they kind of forced us to watch the trials. Seeing you go through that pain… it was horrible Dean.”

“Yeah,” Dean said as he let out a breath. “Try living it.”

“Have you and Cas… Ever switched like that before,” Sam asked. He had a thick look of concern on his face.

“The only thing like that was when we were trapped in Heaven and I saw through Cas’s eyes.”

Sam’s eyes shifted to Cas. “Did you do that… intentionally,” he asked. He looked like he was deep in thought.

Cas felt conflicted. “I don’t know… It just happened.”

Sam sat back, his long legs were stretched out in front of him and he rubbed his chin while he thought.

“That just don’t make a lick of sense,” Bobby muttered. “How can they be switching bodies if they ain’t even aware they’re doing it?”

“Hang on,” Sam said. His eyes lit up like he had an idea. “What if it’s some kind of… fail safe?"

“English, Sam,” Dean said, he crossed his arms over his chest.

“Well… how bad would you say the pain was during the trial,” Sam asked. He looked at both men like either could answer.

“It… was overwhelming,” Cas admitted. Dean nodded in agreement.

“It got so bad that I passed out,” Dean said. “When I opened my eyes… I was Cas, I don’t know how I was… but I just knew…”

“I’m thinking that you two made the switch as a last resort to fight off whatever was harming the other. You couldn’t beat the restraints and Cas couldn’t beat the sigil… but when you switched… those things didn’t affect you anymore.”

“It’s like ya switched to make it a fair fight,” Bobby mused.

“Exactly. In order to keep you both alive, the Bond switched you two.”

“That makes sense,” Cas said, “but now Zachariel thinks that Dean and I are cheating… He will likely make the trials even worse for us.”

There was a knock at the door and an angel stepped inside. Dean was so used to being barged in on by them that he was actually surprised.

“Castiel, Dean, it is time for your judging. After that, you will begin the next trial. Would you please come with me?”

Dean and Cas stood up a bit reluctantly. What choice did they have?

“Zachariel is very displeased with how the first trial went. This will be the last time you and Cas will be held in the same room… and from now on all of your doors will be locked.”

That stung, but it made sense. Dean was actually really surprised that they seemed to have as much free reign as they did.

“Sam and Bobby, you will be escorted by these two,” the soft-spoken angel gestured over her shoulder at two angels behind her.

Dean and Cas turned to look at Sam and Bobby in the hallway for a moment before nodding. Each group went separate ways down the long, white hallway towards the uncertainty of the next trial.


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! There are supposed to be 21 chapters to this story! I'm a silly goose and accidentally deleted it. You can read it over on fanficition.net and I will be reuploading it here once I upload chapter 22! (I just don't want previous readers to get their hopes up for a chapter that I previously posted) 
> 
> Sorry for the confusion and stayed tuned! I will be posting more soon! (July 2017)

Dean and Cas stepped into the huge stadium. The moment they stepped through the doors the crowd erupted. There was such an odd mixture of cheers and boos coming from the crowd that it mostly sounded like endless screaming and Dean wasn’t sure, but it seemed like there was more of an audience than last time.

Dean’s heart was hammering away in his chest.  They had been ripped away from their conversation with Sam and Bobby and now they were about to be judged for their performance in the last trial.

He had no idea if they had done well or not. With how abruptly the last trial had ended, Dean wasn’t sure what to expect. Did they pass? Did they fail? And if they did fail… what would happen?

His senses were ramped up on high, but not knowing what to expect seemed to make it worse. Even in his nervousness, Dean kept his face passive, his shoulders broad and his chin up. He wouldn’t give Zachariel the pleasure of seeing his fear.

Zachariel’s face flicked onto the screen in the center of the stadium.

“Welcome back brothers and sisters, thank you all for your patience after the first Trial.”

Zachariel smiled to the audience but it didn’t last long. He never seemed to be able to hold a smile for long and his face slowly began to look more and more infuriated. 

“In the previous trial, there was a very unexpected turn. Somehow Dean and Castiel switched bodies.”

Zachariel’s voice echoed throughout the stadium as the words sunk into the audience’s heads. Every face that Dean was close enough to see shifted into utter confusion. Zachariel nodded his head, agreeing with the shock of the crowd.

“Despite our investigations, we could not find any foul play. Apparently, the switch was because of their Bond.”

There was a stunned silence that hung in the air and it felt like every eye in the stadium was staring right at Dean. Dean rubbed the back of his neck to stop the hair from standing up.

“Since our last trial was designed by the Choir of Principalities we have asked our lead Principality to come and do the final judging.”

The crowd began to cheer as Zachariel stepped back and a beautiful woman stepped forward. One look at her and it was easy to tell that she wasn’t human. She had dark skin and full lips that rested in a natural smile. Despite her darker features, her eyes were a stunning blue. They instantly reminded Dean of Cas’s eyes.

“Thank you, Zachariel,” She said. Her voice was soothing and light, “Dean and Castiel were expected to report what it was that the other was feeling in the previous trial. Dean correctly answered one of the emotions Castiel was feeling.”

Not only was the crowd hanging on every word she said but so were Dean and Cas. He had no idea what she would say… it could turn sour at any moment.

“However,” she continued.  “When it came to the other being in pain, Dean was so overwhelmed by the effects of Castiel’s pain that he was unable to speak. Although he could not verbally tell us that Castiel was feeling pain, it was still very evident in his reactions.”

The woman seemed to smile down at Dean and he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Was she praising him? Was she impressed by his and Cas’s Bond? Dean would never have imagined this outcome.

“Lastly, I have been asked to weigh in on the two switching bodies.”

Dean’s eyes shifted to Zachariel’s face near the bottom of the screen. He had such a dirty smirk on his face that it made Dean’s stomach turn.

“I believe that the two showed a true connection to each other. The two went above and beyond to ensure the safety of their partner. Principalities are known for their military-like approach to war, but without teamwork and companionship, our forces would mean nothing. Working together is what makes us strong.”

The smile fell off of Zachariel’s face so fast that it was almost comedic. He stepped forward and practically shoved the other angel off of the stage.

“Thank you,” he said to her, although it was clear that he didn’t mean it. “Our next trial comes from the Seraphs, the highest choir of Angels. Typically both members are separated and set out to find each other using nothing more than their Bond as guidance.”

Zachariel took a few steps to the left, smiling at the ground. “Due to our little switch between Dean and Castiel in the last trial… Dean will be on his own to find Castiel. The angel will not be able to help him.”

The crowd burst out and Dean thought that they sounded angry. Maybe that was wishful thinking.

“The trial will continue until you locate Castiel. Good luck, Dean,” Zachariel said mockingly, “because the trial will now begin.”

* * *

 

Before he had time to move… Before he had time to think… Dean was opening his eyes to find himself somewhere else entirely. Just like in the first trial the stadium that he had been in had changed and now Dean was standing in the center of a crowd of people.

Hundreds of emotionless faces were pushing past him, bumping his shoulders and slipping by. It was like being in a crowded school hallway with tons of people forcing their way around him. Dean tried to make eye contact with the many faces that shuffled past but no one met his gaze. He even tried speaking to one but they still just slid past him.

Dean was lucky that he was tall, because he was able to see over quite a few of the people’s heads, but what he saw was almost more confusing. Where the group of people pushing past Dean seemed to end, roaring traffic began. It was moving so fast that it looked like blurs of color. It almost had a cliché sound of cars whooshing and honking like he’d hear in a cartoon.

He looked up and he saw skyscrapers reaching for the skies. Towers of reflective windows leading up to the clouds, buildings of every shape, color, and size. Flashing signs were everywhere, people were shouting and the smell of coffee was in the air.

Dean was completely lost.

Cities weren’t really his thing. Sure he’d been in and hunted in plenty of them, but he definitely preferred seeing land stretched out in front of him. Growing up in a place like Kansas and always being on the road was likely what did it. This concrete jungle was a complete mystery to him.

How was he ever going to get to Cas like this? Standing around wasn’t helping and his shoulders were actually starting to hurt from the amount of people bumping into him.

Dean wasn’t sure how, but he felt like he would have to walk against the current of people in order to reach Cas. Dean weaved and slid past people as well as he could, it was almost exactly like swimming against a strong current in a stream. He wasn’t sure if he was getting anywhere or not. The people just kept coming…

When he broke out of the crowd it was so sudden that Dean tripped and fell hard on his knee. It was like someone suddenly shut the resistance off and he was not ready. He cursed and quickly pushed himself back up onto his feet.

He looked around for a bit. All the buildings and streets looked the same. He had no idea where to go. On a whim, Dean picked a direction and began to jog that way. It took him a good minute to stop limping on the leg he’d just slammed into the ground, but he was able to push past it.

He was looking at buildings and alleyways and a dog with its head sticking out of a car window when he suddenly slammed into something. He fell backward, landing hard. Dean squinted in front of him but he didn’t see what it was he had hit.

His question was quickly answered when suddenly the neon words “Wrong Way” popped up in front of him. The invisible wall gave off a cartoonish snicker, sounding like a cheap Halloween decoration.

“Son of a bitch,” Dean mumbled to himself as he stood up. He placed his hands on the wall in front of him, giving it a good push. The words appeared again and the wall gave another cartoonish laugh.

_Wrong way._

How could this be right? He was almost sure that this was the direction Cas was in. Dean rolled his shoulders and decided to run back the way he came. Maybe ‘wrong way’ meant he was completely going the wrong direction?

He passed the dog panting from the car window and two other people decked out in proper jogging gear. He passed several odd, little newspaper holders with all different kinds of things to offer. His ears were buzzing with the sounds of traffic and sirens blaring somewhere far away. He swiped his hand across his brow to stop some of the sweat from getting in his eyes.

Then he heard it.

A deep, rumbling growl.

He looked over his shoulder and behind him, he saw a large, vicious dog snarling at him. His teeth were bared and foaming drool was dripping from its mouth. Dean stopped dead in his tracks.

This was like something out of a movie. The dog was growling and barking, his gaze dead set on Dean. He stepped forward, barking and making it clear that he was going to attack. Dean’s whole body tensed up and when the dog suddenly lunged forward Dean full out ran as hard as he could.

He dodged some trash cans and threw them down behind him in hopes of slowing down the dog, and nearly got taken down by a fire hydrant. Sidewalk after sidewalk, slipping past people, running down alleyways, but no matter what he did the dog would not give up.

Up ahead of him he could see an alleyway with a fire escape.

There was no way he could outrun a dog, but if he went up…

His lungs burned but his flight response was in full swing so Dean pushed himself forward. He had one chance at this. If he missed he was this dog’s dinner for sure. He focused as the fire escape got closer and closer. He was analyzing everything that he could in those moments. He may have been running like it was an Olympic sport but he had to concentrate. He had to make this jump count.

Dean braced himself and when he knew he was close enough he sprang forward grabbing the bottom of the ladder. 

This ladder, in particular, was designed to slide down so that it wasn’t such a leap to the ground for those using the fire escape. Dean swung his legs up so that the dog couldn’t grab him and the rusted metal whined against his weight. The cool metal burned against his hands.

Dean had no time to react. He literally watched it happen right before his eyes. The track that the ladder rested in had several screws and bolts holding it in place, but as he was about to pull himself up, those screws disappeared.

They just popped right out of existence.

Dean’s heart stopped and the metal slid freely, following the track until sliding past the stopping point. Dean was left gripping the bottom of the ladder as it and he fell to the ground. He slammed into the pavement, his skull screaming out in pain when he hit.

Then there was darkness.

…

Within moments Dean’s body jerked and when he opened his eyes he was standing in the middle of a crowd of people pushing their way past him.

* * *

 

Hours. Dean was sure he’d been at this for hours. It seemed like it didn’t matter which way he went; he could not find Cas. His body ached, he’d been through so much torture while trying to find the angel.

He’d been hit by a car when he raced out into the street without looking, beaten by a band of thugs for accidentally entering their gang territory, and even shot down by a cop who overreacted to Dean reaching into his pocket. Not to mention the obvious signs of Zachariel messing with him. Rain breaking out for no reason, extreme winds blowing him all over. There was even a time where he tried to run down a sidewalk and the cement became wet again as if it had just been laid.

Worst of all, no matter what happened to him, he always awoke in the middle of the crowd of emotionless faces. It wasn’t just the fear of being “killed” that Dean had to worry about though, there also seemed to be a time limit. He had no idea how much time he had because the angel’s had taken his watch and his phone.

The only way he knew his time was up was when a bell would begin to toll. He had no idea where this bell was in the sea of buildings, but no matter where he was or what he was doing he was teleported back to the crowd when it began to toll.

Dean broke free of the crowd once again. His legs were weak and he was panting hard, covered in sweat. This was so hard. So much harder than he ever could have imagined. He fell to his knees, breathing deeply to try and catch his breath. Dean watched spots appear on the sidewalk beneath him as sweat rolled off of his forehead and fell to the ground.

Maybe he couldn’t do this. The air was hot and reeked of car exhaust and Dean’s muscles ached like he’d been chasing a monster for hours. Maybe he wasn’t good enough to find Cas. He was just a human… How did he ever expect to make it through these trials?

A pair of legs appeared before him. For a second Dean wondered if someone in this city was worried about him. That pleasant little thought evaporated when he heard the person speak.

“Would you like to quit, Dean?”

Dean did his best to remain calm. He looked up to find the one person he did not want to see… Zachariel. His eyebrows were cocked and he had a smile tugging at the sides of his mouth.

Dean despised him.

Truthfully he did want to quit. He wanted a cold beer, a lazy chair and some kind of sport on in the background. He wanted to stuff his face with a fresh burger or a nice helping of apple pie. He wanted out of this mess but one thing kept him right where he was. Castiel. He couldn’t just give up on their Bond because he was tired and hungry.

Zachariel crouched down to get closer to Dean’s face. He smirked at him and that crazy spark was in his eye, “Are you going to forfeit?”

“No,” Dean growled out through clenched teeth. He turned away from Zachariel, just the sight of him made Dean want to explode in a hot rush of fury. If only he had the energy…

Zachariel stood back up and then promptly kicked Dean in the stomach. Dean released a loud sound of pain at the sudden attack and fell forward.

“At this rate you’ll never find him. You aren’t even using your Bond.” Dean ground his teeth and began to try to stand up. Zachariel slammed his foot into Dean once more. “You can stay stuck in here as long as you like.”

Dean heard Zachariel fly away but he didn’t try to stand up right away. He’d been away from Cas for so long that he was starting to feel panicky. He worried that the ripping sensation of them being separated would tear through him again like it did when the pair was separated in Heaven.

Stretching his muscles burned, but he had to keep moving. He forced himself up onto his feet and made it about as far as a streetlight.  He had to stop and lean against it for support.

“Dammit Cas,” he muttered to himself. “Where are you?”

Despite all the pain it typically took, Dean wished he could see through Cas’s eyes. He just needed a sign or something to show him where Cas was. He had no idea where to even begin.

_“You’re not even using your Bond.”_

That’s what Zachariel had said, but how was he supposed to use it if Cas wasn’t responding? Dean’s chest felt tight, and his hands were itchy in a way that only Cas could fix. He just needed to touch him…

Dean closed his eyes and took a deep breath. This nightmare wouldn’t end until he did. He couldn’t fail anymore. He tried to gather his focus.

 _‘Cas,’_ he thought. ‘ _Where are you?’_

Dean breathed slowly, willing himself to feel something…  Dean opened his eyes. Was that a little tug? Whether it was or not, Dean didn’t have much else to go by. He started in the direction he thought the tug came from. Every few steps or so he would stop and try to make sure that he was still going the right way.

He waited for some cars to whip by before crossing a street and heading up several concrete stairs. His heart was pounding. Was he getting close?

He started heading straight, past a few benches and getting closer to what looked like a park. He spotted a woman walking her dog nearby and he stopped. Was this still right?

He tried to clear his mind, breathing deeply. He felt the urge to go left. So he did. He followed the sidewalk away from the park toward a creepy looking church. The moment the church hit his vision, Dean knew.

Cas was in there.

He took off running up the hill, going as fast as he could. He was running so hard that he could barely breathe, but he wouldn’t stop. The hill was steep and made his muscles burn from trying to run so fast. He got to the church doors and tried to open them, but despite how he pushed or pulled against them, they would not open.

Dammit!

He ran around to the side of the building until he found a dusty window. He peeked inside and found Cas laying on the floor on his back in the center of the church. He looked like he was asleep. Dean started banging on the windows, calling Cas’s name but the angel would not wake.

_Dong._

Dean’s eyes widened. The bell was tolling. He was about to get reset. Dean ran around the back of the building.

_Dong._

No, no, no! There was no door back here either!

“CAS!”

_Dong!_

Within the next second, Dean opened his eyes to find that he was once again in that sea of emotionless faces pushing past him.

“DAMMIT!!!”

He had been right there! Cas had been right in front of his face! Frustration raced through his body. How could he slip away so quickly?!

In a hot rage Dean began to work his way through the crowd. This time he was shoving people out of his way. His chest was aching. To be so close only to get ripped away… It was killing him. Some of the people he was shoving seemed to come to life. Swinging at him and pushing back. It shocked Dean to see the emotionless faces come to life.

He made it out of the sea of people when the pain of separation ripped through him. Dean gripped his chest and cried out in pain. Dean no longer just wanted Cas, he needed him. His body ached like it was on fire.

He pushed through the pain and retraced his steps. People seemed to be coming out of nowhere, forcing him to have to swerve around them. Then a marching band came blaring down the street, pounding drums and blowing trumpets. The sea of students playing instruments was thick and so fucking long. Dean was starting to think he would never see the end of their trail. Finally, when he had had enough he jumped into the crowd and pushed people out of his way. It was satisfying to hear the instruments make strange sounds when the player was knocked off balance. He didn’t have time for this shit. He had a growing feeling that Zachariel was the one behind the growing number of distractions, but he focused on getting to Cas.

He raced across the street and nearly got mowed down by some people on bikes. Still, he carried on, passed a few buildings, around the block, across the street. Then, he was near the park. He was getting close! He darted left nearly falling into an open manhole as he got to the concrete stairs. Dean was sure that there were way more stairs this time than last, but he still took off, pushing himself up the steps. He was well on his way, he only had a little bit further until he would see the church.

Above him, he heard birds chirping loudly. At first, he didn’t think much of it but as he ran the birds began getting louder and louder. He looked up when a shadow passed over him and saw flocks of birds over him. Within a moment the birds began to swoop down from the sky, attacking him!

“Son of a bitch,” Dean shouted, covering his face. They pecked at him, flapping their wings and scratching at him with their feet. They swarmed around him in clusters leaving Dean in a blind panic, every which way that he turned another bird was swooping in. He did all that he could to bat them away and in that moment he forgot all about finding Cas.

He was shouting and crouching and full out swinging at the birds until he lost the path he was supposed to be following and tripped. His ankle twisted and he tumbled face first into a pond. Dean lifted his face from the water, gasping. He spat water out of his mouth and briefly thought that it tasted a little funny.

He pushed himself up, cursing as he stood. The birds were gone but now he was soaking wet and his ankle was screaming in agony under his weight. This was getting out of control.

“Zachariel you bastard,” Dean seethed under his breath. He pushed his wet hair up to keep it from sticking to his forehead and hobbled back up the hill he had fallen down. Dean looked around to get his bearings and then he saw it. The church. That wonderful, creepy, little church!

Working through the pain in his ankle Dean began to be able to put more and more pressure on it. It wasn’t long until he was able to walk almost normally up the steep hill. Attacked by birds, soaking wet, and aching muscles but Dean only had one thing in mind and that was getting to Cas. He was so close to the end that he could almost taste victory.

Because of his determination, Dean didn’t hear the squeal of tires right away, but once the car barreling down the hill swerved closer to the hunter, he froze. The car was headed straight for him! The horn blared as it got closer. For a moment this seemed so out of control that Dean thought it couldn’t be real. Finally, his senses seemed to kick back in and Dean dodged the car, rolling off to the side.

When Dean looked up from where he landed he saw that the car slammed into a fire hydrant. Water erupted from it like a glacier, raining down and coating him and the streets with water.  Dean pushed himself back onto his feet and continued his way up the hill. He had no other choice. No matter how bad it got, he had to get to Cas.

Zachariel must have become desperate at this point because things just kept getting more and more insane. Another car, _another fucking car,_ came out of nowhere and once again headed straight for Dean. He moved out of the way, but the car was stopped when it suddenly collided with a telephone pole.

Dean watched as the pole leaned before giving way and crashing into a nearby building. It sent glass flying everywhere. Luckily Dean’s leather jacket was able to protect him from taking any damage. A loud snapping sound filled the air and when Dean looked up he saw another pole falling over.

His heart stopped. His breath evaporated.

The pole was falling right towards the church!

Dean bolted forward, he could only watch as the telephone pole easily broke through the wooden structure of the church roof, causing dust of ruin to fill the air. Wood splintered in every direction and all Dean could think was that he needed to be right there right now, helping Cas. What if he was hurt?!

He gasped air into his lungs and realized something even worse. The phone wires were still live. He could see the sparks dancing and flying in every direction. Dean was hauling ass to get to Cas but as he ran he watched in horror as the old wood of the church quickly ignited.

It was unreal to watch how fast it spread. He could see Cas laying there peacefully with no idea of the dangers surrounding him. Finally Dean made it to the doors. Even though Cas wouldn’t wake he kept screaming his name. He lifted his leg and slammed it into the doors of the church, trying everything he could to kick them open.

The doors moved against his foot but the door never broke. Dean tried again and again until finally the doors burst open and Dean was able to run inside. He darted across the church and threw himself toward Castiel, blocking debris as it fell from the ceiling. The fire was burning so close to Cas, it made Dean start to sweat immediately. Dean grabbed handfuls of the angel’s trench coat and lifted him into more of a reclined sitting position.

“Cas,” he was screaming, “Cas, wake up!”

Dean was shaking Cas so hard it could be mistaken as violent but nothing seemed to work. Dean went deeper into his own panic. Wasn’t the trial supposed to end once they were reunited?!

All he could see was the orange and yellow flames spreading all around him, his heart was pounding in his chest and the wood was popping and hissing as it burned. He had to get Cas out. Dean shoved his arm under Cas’s legs and used the other to wrap around his back. He took a deep breath and forced himself to lift the angel up off the ground.

He was heavy, but Dean had gotten used to lifting dead weight from moving bodies and saving Sam’s ass. Plus with his heart pounding in full shock, lifting Cas almost seemed easy. Dean moved through the church ducking under falling wood and avoiding flames as best he could.

Smoke was burning in his lungs and his eyes watered but he did not stop. Debris was falling everywhere and the church was creaking loudly as the wood was engulfed in flames. Dean was so hot he couldn’t even sweat now. His skin felt tight like it might crack and peel off in clumps.

He moved forward, ducking under a large piece of wood that was hanging down from the ceiling. He coughed and looked down at Cas’s face. He was so close to getting them both to safety.

Dean stumbled out of the doorway and ran until he made it down the hill, several feet away. Once he was in the clear his muscles wouldn’t allow him to carry the angel any further. Dean’s legs trembled as he sank to the ground, gently laying Cas in front of him with his head in his lap.

Dean gasped heavily, filling his lungs with fresh air and coughing out the smoke. Cas’s face was covered in soot and part of his coat looked a little singed but he was safe. Dean looked back up at the church on the hill and watched it crumble into the flames.

The city that Dean had been trapped in for so long began to melt away. The sky transformed into piles and piles of angels shouting from the crowd. The buildings melted into the stadium walls. Angels upon angels were cheering for him.

Then Castiel opened his eyes. The blue of his eyes was the most wonderful thing Dean had seen all day. Relief surged through Dean’s body and his muscles relaxed a little. Just seeing him awake and okay was enough to finally calm Dean down a bit.

Cas was okay, everything… was okay.

“Cas,” Dean said with a smile.

The angel started up at him looking utterly confused. “Dean, what…?”

Before Cas could fully ask his question Dean was pulling him into a tight hug. Cas didn’t hug back right away due to his confusion but Dean didn’t care. He pressed his face into the angel’s skin. He smelled like smoke.

Zachariel’s voice boomed through the stadium, and it was so loud that it broke up Dean and Cas’s hug.

“After nearly seven hours of searching, Dean was able to find Castiel.”

The crowd erupted into cheers and Dean couldn’t believe it. They were cheering for him…  Actually cheering… for him.

“There will be no more trials until tomorrow. Until then, you are all dismissed.

Dean and Cas made it onto their feet. Smiling and waving at the approving crowd. For one moment everything seemed okay. Everything was at peace. Dean reached over and took Cas’s hand in his, before turning to the angel and giving him a smile.

No matter what Zachariel threw at them, no matter how hard it was… They would make it.


End file.
